Chapter 15: Escape

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Chapter 15: Escape 


His warmth enveloped the whole me. My anxious body earlier vanished with the embrace he gave me. It was too comforting. The heaviness in my heart went to nowhere. It was replaced by the satisfaction of having him touched again by me. I wish I could wipe all the pain off of his being.

"I missed you, Sumi..." he whispered as he touched my hair gently. My hot tears started to fall from my eyes. I hugged him tighter as I felt the guilt all over again. It was overwhelming. I missed him so much, too. I almost went crazy for being regretful for years. The years after his death were my everyday death, too. Those were the darkest years of my life. No one knew how much painful it was. That someone died because of my stupidity and immaturity. My wildest dream during those days was to turn back time and changed what I need to change just to stop the most horrible thing happened to him.

"I'm sorry... I really am..." I apologized for the ninth time. I know sorrys aren't enough. It will never be enough. But apologizing is the only thing I can do for the rest of my life. I couldn't even remember the speech I practiced. My mouth just kept on saying sorry and my mind wasn't functioning well.

"I'm sorry, Asahi... I was such a fool..." I said while still crying. He was just patting my back, as if I never did him wrong. I kept on sobbing until I got tired of crying. His shirt was already wet because of my tears.

"It was never your fault. It was my decision to celebrate your birthday, Sumi. Don't blame yourself. I don't want to hear anything from you. I will not accept your apology. You did nothing wrong. Please, don't let live your life full of regrets. It was my fate to die. It was never your fault," he said, gently scolding me for saying my apologies.

I remained quiet the whole time because I couldn't gather my thoughts properly. My tears kept on falling as if I have saved up an ocean of tears.

Almost an hour already passed before we let go of each other's arms. I almost forgot that Haru was with us the whole time. My eyes surveyed the surrounding and searched for Haru. He was sitting on a big rock, not so far from us. He was just looking at us without any hint of impatience and boredom on his face. I gave him a small smile as he did the same.

My sight went back to Asahi. His eyes were full of emotions I couldn't read. I was thinking about what I was going to say when he held the both of my hands and caressed them softly.

"I think it's already time, Sumi... I couldn't stay here for any longer. I just want you to know that I'm happy to meet you here in my remaining hours..." he suddenly said that made my eyes wide. The sadness engulfed me again. It's still early...

"But...W-Why...?" I asked him as I tightened my grip on his hands.

He sadly smiled and caressed again the back of my hands. "If only I can control myself here in this world, I would want to say for a bit longer and hang out with you... But I can't. I also think that it's about time to let go of my life in this dreamcatcher world. To tell you the truth, it was fun. But I don't want to be caged here and surrounded by evil spirits again... Those years were enough..." he said without any hint of anticipation.

I swallowed hard and tried to keep my tears from falling uncontrollably again. I looked straight into his eyes and waited for him to talk again.

"Everything happened for a reason, Natsumi. You may not know it now but I know someday you will. I'm glad that I met you. You're a grown-up now... I can see how my death scarred you but don't live with it. I hope you find the best only for yourself. Never blame yourself for something unfortunate you didn't ask to happen. Just be happy... and never give up easily on things that make you weak. I know you can surpass every battle. You are strong and you have to be strong for us. After this, leave all your regrets and sorrows here. Come back to your world with happiness... Start a new life... Move forward... with a smile," every word he said was absorbed in my heart and soul. It pains me more but it was so refreshing to hear that he isn't blaming me for his death. I will still stand by my view that I share a mistake on his death... I will not save myself because I was at fault. But now after hearing his motivating words for me, I felt contented and light-hearted.

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