mentanoia - ben gross

chapter thirteen;

Chapter thirteen;

Jogging after the small children who were jumping around with popcorn that must've weight more than themselves, Jane did her best to make sure they spilled as little as possible. Ben on the other hand, was walking a bit behind with just a big grin on his face.

"Here- Jane!" He yelled when they passed their section.

Quickly looking over her shoulder to see Ben waving, she ran the last few yard to her brothers and grabbed both of them by the collar carefully. "Come guys, Ben found our seats." She helped them turn on their heels and soon enough the two boys sprinted off again, now towards Ben.

Strategically planning out their seats, Ben tried to ignore the disappointment he felt when both of the young boys had to sit in-between him and Jane. Max, of course, gladfully took the seat next to Ben.

"I've never been to a game like this before."

Ben laughed and rolled his eyes. "I know you haven't. That's the fourth time you've told me."

Max jumped up and down in his seat. Ben quickly held onto the popcorn box in Max's hands, trying to somewhat steady it.

"I've watched it on tv a lot though." Max continued happily, "But I never get to see the whole game because of stupid bedtime."

Ben grinned, though he couldn't help and try to catch a glimpse of Jane. She was just chatting with Kevin, not noticing Ben's glance at all. He cleared his throat with a cough, "Ah, yes. Bedtime, the biggest party pooper." He didn't know what else to say.

~

After the fourth inning Max somehow started a conversation with an elder couple sitting on the other side of Jane. Of course it started off with him excitedly telling them how this was his first game, which made Ben chuckle out loud, but soon enough Max made Jane switch seats with him so that he 'didn't have to scream and disturb the game'.

Jane agreed to it, knowing that it'd be good for Max to talk to strangers as long as she could keep an eye on him, but it hit her emotionally. Max had never been the one to actually continue small talk with a stranger. He loved saying hi to people in his neighborhood but always quickly put his head back down.

Seeing the scene envelope before her, Jane got goosebumps.

Rubbing her elbows against the armrests, she didn't even notice rubbing her arms against Ben's. She couldn't look away from Max for even the smallest second.

"Are you okay?" A voice chirped from her left side. Ben looked up from their touching arms and glanced at her curiously with the widest set of eyes.

She nodded hesitantly, "Yeah. Yes, no everything's fine."

He scooched forward on his seat and followed Jane's gaze. Unlike her, he felt warm from the inside while watching Max with two elderly people. "They're not going to kidnap him or hurt him, don't worry, I got my eye on them."

Rolling her eyes, Jane nudged him mindlessly. His heart rate jumped up. "It's not that-" She paused, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment in a weak attempt to shut her thoughts off. Taking a breath to explain herself, she decided on the very last second to remain quiet.

"You can talk to me." Ben whispered beneath his breath, hating how insecure the words came out.

Her eyes became glazy, and stubbornly she kept her gaze on the game that continued in front of her. She shrugged her shoulders and coughed once. "I just want to make sure that I keep an eye on them is all."

~

But after 3 more innings and twenty minutes of unconscious arm-rubbing, Ben could see Jane hadn't been able to enjoy a single minute of the game. He eventually got frustrated enough that he just nudged her softly.

"Switch seats with me." He told her, which earned him a big frown from her. "I'll keep an eye on them for the last innings, come." He already stood up, motioning with his hand for them to switch places.

She, still seated, laid her hand softly on his right wrist. "You are a gem- They're my brothers and honestly you should not have to babysit them. I'm already glad enough that I'm here so that you can focus on the game." She let out a soft chuckle.

But Ben did the unexpected. When her hand rested on his wrist, he moved his hand slightly before wrapping his fingers around her wrist. Then quickly grabbing her other hand with his free hand, he pulled her up from her seat carefully.

He didn't know what had come over him that he was suddenly covered in some kind of confidence.

Blushing down as he held her hands just a second longer, Jane scooted into the other seat. She could see Ben staring at her soft smile until she was fully seated. He then quickly took his own seat and smiled satisfied.

Shaking himself awake from the warm feeling in his stomach, he turned in his seat just enough to be able to have both of the boys in his view without having to turn his neck all too much. He then pressed his back against the seat and started finding almost just as much entertainment in watching the boys respond to the game and one another as Ben had found in the ballgame itself.

~

After the game and a confusingly long bathroom break from Ben, the rich boy drove his much poorer friends home. They didn't talk much in the car as both kids had fallen asleep in the wink of an eye and somehow the silence between the teenagers had gotten comfortable. Now that Ben had learned Jane actually found joy in just his company and not even always his words he felt at ease, like he didn't have to impress anyone. Like he could take a break from screaming for attention, like he'd gotten used to at school.

Out of nowhere, Ben straightened his back. His relaxed smile turned into a frown. "Hold up, hold up." They were only a couple blocks away from Jane's house and yet he abruptly parked the car on the side of the street. Jumping out, he opened the trunk of the car.

Jane could only see his serious face and hear the sound of plastic bags, but eventually could see the muscles in his forehead relax through the rear mirror. He held up his wallet with a relieved smile. "Never mind!" He cheered, threw the trunk close and jumped back in the driver's seat again. He put the wallet down next to him and started the car again. "You know that feeling when you think you just lost something-"

But Jane cut him off. Her eyes were glued to the wallet. She carefully grabbed it and turned it around in her hands. Not once did she open it. "You got a new wallet?"

He sheepishly laughed. "Yeah, I lost mine a few weeks ago." He muttered, scratching the back of his neck as he kept his eyes on the road.

"Yeah." Jane replied, "I know. Did you throw the old one away?" She pouted confused.

Ben tilted his head. "No, no. I lost it. So I bought a new one."

Jane shook her face, disagreeing. "No, I found it." She replied sternly, "I gave it to Shira."

Only now his eyes ripped apart from the road. "What do you mean you found it? Gave it to Shira?"

She shook her face now even more confused, "I found it while weeding, you must've lost it when you came for dinner or something."

His nod was too extreme to come across as genuine. Dinner, sure. He came over for dinner when it happened. Not after Shira's party where he'd gotten way too drunk and had walked all over to Jane's- Especially not that time.

"When did you give it to Shira?" He stuttered, his hands kneading the stirring wheel.

Jane shrugged her shoulders, "I don't know- It was on a Monday. The week- It was the week I barely saw you. That's why I gave it to her. I went home straight after giving it to her."

He felt himself heat up. Every muscle tensed up and Ben could feel how his anger started to boil. Now driving into Jane's street, he knew he had to keep cool for a little longer. If only it'd be for the sake of the sleeping siblings in the backseats.

Jane held her breath just as much. She couldn't imagine the feelings that were going through Ben.

Ben eventually parked in front of Jane's house and let himself exhale. "She stole from me."