if we survive

t e n

r o r y

I was at Colman's side and one of our medical assistants was beside me named Ethan frantically yelling at survivors to give him whatever medical supplies they had. We ended up with a lot of gauze, some alcohol that was meant for drinking but Ethan swore it was just as good as medical alcohol, and a few bandages. Nothing too great but it was good enough for now. Colman was groaning and trying her best to keep her painful screams to herself. I grabbed her hand and she dropped her head to the ground closing her eyes tight. Ethan was frantically looking through his supplies while Colman was frantically running her mouth trying to distract herself from the pain.

"I-Uh, you know I wanted to be an actress before this." She nodded and kept her eyes closed tightly. "I was only thirteen when this started but it was my dream. I remember being so sad about the outbreak and for some reason I hoped nothing bad would happen so I could still pursue my dreams, then I lost my little sister and I know bad things will always happen and my dreams are dead. Sorry, I'm blabbering." She cried out in pain when Ethan poured alcohol on her leg without warning.

"No, no, keep talking to me." I squeezed Colman's arm and she nodded painfully.

"I-I think it's funny that I know bad things will always happen so now I just always hope that the bad things will be funny somehow. They aren't very funny, and I don't think they ever will be." Colman kept her eyes closed during the entire process of Ethan tending to her leg. She went on and on about her dreams before the outbreak and then she talked about her sister. Most of the things she said didn't make sense in the slightest but as long as she was talking I was listening. Suddenly, Ethan cursed.

"There isn't an exit wound, the bullet is still in her leg. It looks like it was stopped by her bone, and her leg bone might be chipped." Ethan shot me a worried look then gave Colman a sincere gaze.

She shook her head and dropped it to the ground. "Just get it out!"

"I can't! I need very specific supplies and they're in the medical cabin." Ethan said. Colman grasped his arm and glared at him. "Get it out!" She screamed.

"I can't just use my hands it might get infected." Ethan looked at me. I didn't know what to do and I knew Ethan wanted me to tell him something. I was looking back and forth between Colman and Ethan trying to figure out what I was supposed to do. Colman was mumbling to herself talking non-stop about nonsense to keep her mind off of the wound in her leg.

"What would happen if you left the bullet in?" I asked and Ethan looked at me like I was insane.

"There are three options to that, it'll either give her lead poisoning and kill her, cause an infection that will likely kill her, or her body will push it out with time but her healing process will take months rather than weeks." Ethan said and held a piece of gauze against the bullet wound. "There's a seventy percent chance she'll die if this bullet stays inside her leg."

"I think I want the bullet removed." Colman mumbled. She sounded exhausted and her voice was scratchy from screaming.

"I don't know what to do." I mumbled to myself pinching the bridge of my nose. "Can you sanitize your hands with the alcohol?"

"Maybe? I'm not a professional, Holden, I could cause more harm to her by just hoping I can find the bullet." Ethan was visibly panicking but he was the closest person to a Doctor we had at the moment.

"Ethan, she needs you right now, the sooner that bullet is out the sooner she'll recover." I nodded at him encouragingly and he cringed. He sighed and poured the alcohol on both of his hands.

"It's going to hurt, she needs something to bite down on so she doesn't bite her tongue or break a tooth." Ethan closed his eyes and took a deep breath while I pulled off my belt and folded it.

"Here, bite down on this. It's going to hurt a lot." I said to her. Colman nodded and bit down on my belt. Ethan attempted to shake away her nerves and carefully used his pointer finger and thumb to dig into Colman wound. Colman screamed and tears fell down her cheeks. Her grip on my hand was nearly bone crushing. Ethan looked like he was going to cry himself.

"You can do this Ethan, come on I know you can." I encouraged him. He gritted his teeth and cringed while he carefully tried to find the bullet. Blood covered his hand and Colman's leg but soon, Ethan pulled out a small round bullet. He sighed in relief but immediately brought gauze to Colman's wound to slow the bleeding once again. I glanced at Colman, her eyes were closed and her face was emotionless. I moved to where I was sitting beside her head and quickly checked her pulse, she was alive. She'd passed out from the pain. Ethan successfully disinfected Colman's leg once again and wrapped it up. He dropped his head in head hands and took a shaky breath, Colman's blood was smeared on his face now but he didn't seem to care.

"I did it, she's alive." He mumbled.

"Yeah, you did it. You did amazing, Ethan." I placed a hand on his shoulder and he nodded.

"I hope I never have to do that again."