Flowers From You

chapter nineteen

Amoret.

When it was already night, Payton quickly volunteered to drop me by my house. I was about to reject the offer, but I have no choice, he urged and insisted me to say yes. So I did.

On the way home, we passed by Hadyn's home and my eyes instantly lay on his room which was on the left side of the second floor of their house.

His room wasn't lit, and I, of course, as the dearest friend, I begin to worry about him. Though, I'm sure he's in his bed resting with his mother taking care of him. But I can't let it just be like that, I want to be certain and check on him!

Ugh, calm down and have peace, Amoret. You know he's fine, so don't worry!

A few seconds later, I noticed that we're getting near to my house. So I directed Payton to it, then the car halted on its front, which is why I came back to the reality again. I was about to, well, have a petty argument with my (what do you call that) other consciousness or subconscious or the inside voice in my head (whatever), which I always called bitch. I prefer to think that she's the other half of me.

I was about to exit the car but, Payton opened the car door for me, that's why I blabbed, "I can open car doors, you know", but he chuckled.

"It's better for you to have a gentlemen friend than not", he claimed before closing the door, then lean his side on it, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"Oh please, you won't offend me if you weren't", I assured.

He withdraw his eyes from me and hold his gaze on my house. "You live alone in yourself?", he started to ask.

I hesitate on which word to say. Is it a yes or a no? But I always feel like I'm alone in that house, and despite that my mother owns it, it feels like she's a visitor and I'm the owner. That's the result of her absence because of work or maybe other reasons.

Instead, I lifted my shoulder and gave him a half shrug while gazing at it. But the longer I look on it, the more I realize that it was less than a home. It's more like a house full of memories, like a stranger that I shared moments with.

Consequently, he drew his eyebrows together in confusion, his eyes pinned towards me.

"My mom works out of town, and comes every weekend. Sometimes she never returned", I explained, "That's why I can't... I kind of been a reluctant to answer the question".

"And that's why you visit parties and stuff?", I simply nod in what he said. Surely I can't deny that reason, and I do have other ones, but it might've took me hours to recount those and write those in the list 'Reasons Why I Go To Parties And Stuff'. Such a waste of time.

"I have an idea", he blurted, "Why don't I visit you here?".

I halted in his suggestion that made my forehead creased, "And why?".

"So that you won't feel alone", he replied.

I lick my lips while thinking. I'm evidently hesitating again, but it won't be bad to let him visit my house, right?

"Yeah, sure. But I don't do sleepovers, okay?", I beamed.

"Okay, got it", he agreed.

"Amoret?"

***

Hadyn.

After hours of wailing like a baby, I finally found myself standing up then walk towards home as the sky dusked.

I feel exceedingly tired like I exercised for hours. Even though I feel like this, I'm also been wakened up by these intrusive thoughts. They're hunting me, running to me, scaring me off. Then, I became cold and started to sweat as my mind transforms every fantasy inside my head into some kind of reality.

I see the hunter, every detail of him seems real. His red glowing eyes, his crooked nose, smirking lips, sharp cheekbones, tall figure and every feature of his.

My breaths quickened as I stare. I swiftly stepped backwards at the time that he paced closer. I moved even faster when he revealed his knife from behind and attempt to stab it on me.

But as I darted away, I accidentally stumble something that made me fall my butt on the ground. When I raise up, he's gone. Literally gone.

He must be out there.

No, it can't be. I don't want to die.

Go home already!

I-I c-can't... My mother...

You need the pills, or he'll be after you!

My body fidgeted and begin to tremble, so I ran, bolted away from that area. I don't care anymore whoever eyes lay on me or whoever I jostled along the way. All I know is to run away, run away from that thought.

I ran as much as I can and when my legs feel weary, I stopped. I rest my hands on my knees as I catch for air.

You need the pills.

I stand up straight and give myself a step on the sidewalk towards home.

You need the pills.

I walk, keeping myself concentrate and focus.

You need the pills.

I haste my steps.

You need the pills.

I gulped, then comes forth vile thoughts.

You need the pills.

Anxiety. Depression. Paranoia.

You need the pills.

I pulled my hair, clenched my teeth and heaved my chest.

YOU NEED THE PILLS!

I moaned, and was about to scream, until I hear a chatter nearby and I hear a hint of Amoret's voice. Is she there for me? Did she know I'm in great depression?

I released my hands from my hair, calmed myself until my breathing seems normal again.

I smiled, knowing that Amoret's there for me and continue to walk to her. But as her figure looms in my sight, the corner of my lips descends. Why didn't I noticed the black car? Who is that man she is with? And what did he do to make her smile?

Then it all crushed on me.

Several thoughts ravaged my mind, I can't bear to see him with another friend. Did she replaced me? Am I not enough?

"Amoret?"

to be continued...