FINE LINE | HARRY STYLES

#13: malibu.

-in which things are tense between harry and soleil, so soleil decides to take action.

JANUARY, 2024.

This house is probably going to go up in flames one of these days.

Things have recently been sort of...chaotic. With Harry's album coming out in a month, he's been on edge trying to put his tour together. On top of that, he's also been in and out of the house a lot doing promo for the album since he's already dropped two songs within the past two months.

Which means I'm usually left home with the girls and Kiwi and having my own work to do. Sometimes we're able to tag along to whatever he's doing, but I can't just drop everything and go with him every time. I can tell it's getting pretty frustrating for him because he misses us when he's gone and that was something he didn't realize would come into play once he's on tour.

For a while he considered not even having a tour. He'd just drop the album, promote it a bit, and that was that. Apparently he just couldn't see himself gone for too long especially since MJ is growing immensely and he doesn't want to miss any milestones.

We've been also trying for a baby, but that wasn't our top priority. Every test so far has been negative and we think that when the baby finally does come, it'll be when the time is right. So we decided to just keep trying and hope they decide to show up when things are a little more settled. But Harry wants to try as much as we can at least before I lose him for almost a year.

My fashion line is supposed to drop this year and I've been trying to work it so that I don't interfere with anything Harry's been doing. So, the actual date I want to go through with it is still up in the air. As of right now, it's all put together I just need to decide when I want to green light it.

It may not sound like much, but with two growing kids, both now able to run around freely, and a dog that also needs care, we're practically running ourselves ragged.

And for the first time, Harry and I were in a rough patch. An actual, genuine rough patch. I know we've had moments like this before but it was way before we were even married, back when I was dating River and Harry was dating Grace. But that was different, we weren't married.

Lately, things have been tense between us. We haven't had time to connect, or even sit down and talk or watch a movie. And when we do, we always end up fighting or just making bitter comments before one walks away.

I know I joke about sleeping on the couch a lot, but for the first time I've actually been staying downstairs while Harry goes to bed. I'll watch TV until I'm tired and sleep it off on the couch. This upsets Harry, and he usually holds it against me but I just feel like I'm in the way.

He's just been so distant and irritable. I hate to sound so selfish, but he hasn't really made any time for me.

I understand he's busy and I understand his work is important and I'm proud of his talent and the album and I'm excited for him. But, he barely even looks at me anymore and he's always locked in his music room or with the girls doing their own thing. He hasn't smiled at me in weeks and that kills me.

I try to let him know I'm here for him though. I bring him snacks and leave them at the door or I slip notes of encouragement into his luggage when he goes. But still, nothing.

That's what I don't understand. Why is he being so cold? He's busy, I get that, but when he's busy he still makes sure I'm okay or he always shares his work with me. I mean, when he was writing the album, he was constantly showing me every lyric and every melody with such bubbling excitement.

Now that it's done, it's like he wants nothing to do with me.

Last night was the worst of it, in my opinion. I just wanted to talk about it. When I tried, he just blew up. I was honestly not expecting it at all.