Feeling.

Around You

Win is only kind of freaking out. Just a little bit.

(That's a lie, he's totally panicking.)

It's just, when Bright came into parade, he immediately found him and sent him this toothy grin like they're best buds and it made his stomach jump and he just doesn't know how to handle this kind of situation. He made that pretty clear last night. He's not equipped for these kinds of things. And he's not even talking about dating Bright, because he can't do that. (Not that he doesn't think about it a lot.) But even these kinds of friendships are hard for him. With Gun, it's easy. The two talk about serious things, sure, but they do it over wine and they giggle and they say shit like fake it till you make it but with Bright, it's something so different. Opening up to him the other night… it was big for him. Win felt like he was baring his soul and now, in the light of day, he doesn't know if he should have. It's not that he doesn't trust him, because surprisingly, he does. It's just… why did he tell him all of that shit?

When he hears Best say his name, he's pulled from her running inner monologue. "And Metawin, you'll be riding with Chivaaree."

Of course.

he turns to the back of the room and sends him what he's hoping is his normal smile, although judging by the look that crosses his face, he's not pulling off nonchalance.

"Metawin," Bright greets breezily, same as always. Win nods at him and leads the way to the garage, because he's afraid his voice will betray him if he speaks.

They walk the way in silence, although when he sneaks glances at him, he seems perfectly at ease. Well rested, even. They're quiet in the car for awhile until Bright finally breaks it.

"You alright over there?" he asks, his eyes trained on the road.

Win shrugs. "Fine. I'm fine."

He laughs. "Really? Because I'm pretty sure this is quietest you've been ever since you proposed this little friendship."

"I don't always have to talk," he says, which is kind of a lie. Win gets bored easily, so he likes to fill the silence. There's nothing wrong with that. Bright teases him about it all the time but he's positive that he secretly likes it. The fact that he's pushing him right now is just proof of that.

"Right," he says, disbelief clear in his tone.

And the thing is, he wants to talk to Bright. he wants to tell him about how Off wore his uniform shirt inside out for the first twenty minutes of the morning until Tay came up and smacked the back of Bright head. he wants to tell him that this morning a cat was sitting on his windowsill and stared at him while he got dressed and he had no idea where the orange tabby came from but he wants to keep it. Most importantly, he wants to tell him how much he appreciates Bright giving him his ear last night. How nice it felt to just talk without the fear of judgment. But the thing is, he's a mess of nerves and it's like he's forgotten how to act normal around Bright. And this is why he can't open up to people. he never does, and now that he opened up to Bright, he's a jumble of emotions. It's just… he appreciates his friendship a lot, and he's so afraid of messing it up. Apparently, not only does he not know how to be in relationship, he also doesn't know how to be a good friend.

"Sorry, I'm just tired," he says. Pathetic excuse. he knows that Bright can see right through hum. And yet, he just sends him a half-hearted smile and nods. And that is what makes Bright the perfect friend. He knows not to push any further. He knows that when he's ready, if he's ever ready, he'll come to him. (That's also what scares him, if he's being honest. Because these are the things that make him really, really like Bright. Which… he can't do. Hasn't he been clear about how bad he is at all of this? Add to it that he's a cop…)