𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐄. 𝙟𝙤𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙖

chapter five

olivia rodrigo

i awoke with josh next to me, we were cuddling. i smiled to myself, my head was on his chest.

"josh!" i screeched as he tickled me, "what?" he said, teasingly. "oh you-" but i cut myself off because my mom was in the room next to us.

"that's what i thought!" he said, letting go of me, but now he was on top of me. i breathed out, and our faces were centimeters away, our noses barely touching.

we were breathing in and out, and i tilted forward, our noses were completely touching and our breaths were mixing.

he enclosed the space, and we began kissing sort of like madmen. then it all slowed down, and we were now just making out.

i let josh take control, and our legs were tangled together. i put my hands through his hair, although it was curly it was soft and i was able to tangle my fingers through it.

his hands went to my lower back, and we disconnected for a split second only to be attached at the lips again.

a knock at my door, we jolted apart and pretended to watch the movie as my mom walked in.

my eyes were drooping, and josh shook me awake, "liv.." he said, running his fingers through my hair.

i brought myself to get up, and i looked at him the morning light hit his face and made his golden eyes shine, and i smiled.

"i need to take a shower." i said, "why not take one together? saves water." he said, and i laughed, "why not?" i said, biting my lip.

- again, no smut for you guys

i actually got a shower in, but the water was cold and we still took pictures for our picture collage.

it was just us from the collarbone up, though, for you dirty minded freaks. i put a towel around me, and joshuas around his waist.

we got ready, and josh looked at me through the mirror every now and then. i finished my light makeup (blush, mascara, and highlighter) lately i never wanted to wear makeup.

"you're prettyyyyy." josh said, in a baby voice, wrapping his strong arms around me. "no, you're prettttyyyyy." i said back, and he blushed.

we walked onto set, holding hands. everyone looked at each other, and clapped. i smiled but tim let out a sigh, rubbing his head.

"we have a new cast mate, sabrina carpenter." he said, and my face dropped, "along with ethan wracker..." he said, and joshs jaw clenched up.

"oh fuck no!" josh said, "tim, can't you do something about this? sabrina and i just broke up, and ethan..." he whispered the next parts but i knew what he said.

"well, i guess we can cancel their characters." tim said, and everyone seemed to let out a sigh of relief.

"YOU TALKED TO HIM!" ethan practically screeched at me, throwing a paper that i ducked, i felt so out of control.

"IT WAS FOR MY JOB ETHAN! IM DONE!" i screamed, grabbing my things and stomping out of his apartment.

josh was sitting down on my couch in my trailer, and he opened his arms, "come here." he said, and i was sitting in his lap.

my arms were by his lower back and his arms were the same, my head was in the crook of his neck, as i felt the tears well up.

i let my tears fall, josh rubbing my back, affirming me in every way he knew how. hearing ethans name gave me traumatic flashbacks.

i scrubbed my body for hours the night i left him, trying to get all traces of him out of my life, and i still shutter at the thought of his name.

i finally calmed down, and josh was running his fingers through my hair. i had cried so hard that i felt out of energy, but josh got me a coffee.

i smiled at him, and he sat next to me, rubbing my thigh with his thumb as i basically downed the coffee.

"i'm sorry." he said, and i recycled my coffee cup, "about what?" i said, as we walked out, "you know.. him." josh said, and i nodded.

i stopped him, looking up into his eyes, "it's not your fault joshua. i'm serious. please, don't say it is, i feel bad." i said, but my head dropped at the last few words.

he put his finger under my chin and made me forcefully look at him, "i feel responsible for everything concerning you." he said, kissing me.