I Just Loved You (And I Still Do); Taegi/Taekook

❝not fair❞

Taehyung tugged at the neck of his shirt and looked up as Jeongguk spoke up:" How was your day?" The rice tasted bitter on his tongue as he swallowed. He'd been at Yoongi's flat while Jeongguk was at varsity. His own lecture was cancelled but he didn't tell him. He just went straight to Yoongi and told him that they would have the next few hours for themselves.

And even though Taehyung had felt like he owned Jeongguk so much after the first time it felt like it never had happened; a few hours later when he laid down next to him, Jeongguk's warm breath tickling his neck and his from exhaustion raspy voice against his ear. At that moment he didn't think about what he had done; what he and Yoongi had done. It didn't matter. At least not to him at that moment and Taehyung was almost completely sure it didn't matter to Yoongi either. They had met only a few days later again while Jeongguk and Jimin were at dance practice. Taehyung had come home early enough to take a shower - he refused to shower at Yoongi's because he was sure Jeongguk would notice the foreign scent of the body wash - and to linger over a few, messily written notes he'd made in his lectures. When he had heard the clinking of the keys outside the door and Jeongguk had started placing kisses all over his neck while he was leaning over the scraps everything seemed alright.

He had to respond like he always did; don't let the lie show. "Great", he said - no lie - and ate another spoonful of rice," Our lecturer was hilarious", he continued - not completely a lie. He looked into Jeongguk's face. He had heard that people that were lying had difficulties to look into the person's face they were lying to. Taehyung didn't have difficulties as he said:" He was speaking super fast and probably half of the auditorium was completely clueless until the end." And that would have been enough, but- "Moonbok wouldn't stop whispering and complaining about how little sense this made." Taehyung giggled and Jeongguk grinned widely. "Sounds better than my lecture nevertheless." And even though it had been easy - too easy - Taehyung was relieved that he started talking about himself. He smiled and wanted him to go on.

He chewed slowly and swallowed hardly but rather because he couldn't help it but think about today. Indeed it had been a great day. Jeongguk had fucked him in the morning before he left for varsity and Taehyung had been excited because he knew he would be away in the afternoon. He put on one of the low-cut shirts, loved the way Yoongi would nip at his collarbones, and rumpled his hair a bit so that his bangs would hover messily over his forehead. He and Yoongi hadn't talked much. Yoongi had stripped him out of his clothes and had eaten him out as if he'd never done something else. Taehyung knew that Yoongi knew that he still had sex with Jeongguk and he also knew that Yoongi didn't care, that he probably thought it was none of his business. And that was okay. At least that was what Taehyung tried to convince himself of.

Before he had left Yoongi told him that he still had to tidy up because Jimin would come over. Until then Taehyung had never realized how close they actually were. Of course, Jimin was talking a lot about Yoongi but less about how they were but more about how only Yoongi himself was so he was rather surprised. But maybe it was the way Yoongi's eyes softened and his jaw slackened that made him realize that Yoongi had a sweet spot for his best friend. And maybe there had been the beginning of a lump in his throat; something small and nasty that started growing and growing deep inside, waiting for the right moment to block all his airways and make Taehyung choke on all the bad he had done and the lies he had told. Back then he wasn't aware of it, dismissed it as a sore throat. He asked Yoongi whether he could help him but he just shook his head and told him that he looked good in those shirts until he saw him off.

Lying was easy at first. Because whenever he actually missed a lecture there were fellow students like Moonbok that had nothing to do with Yoongi or Jeongguk and that were willed to tell Taehyung about everything they had been told. And Taehyung only went to Yoongi when he knew that Jeongguk wasn't there.