i love you

3/30

{edited}
♡ ♡ ♡

y/n's blood ran cold and all of the color left her face. she froze and for a moment, it seemed like everything was still and unaffected until it all came crashing down as she stood staring at her phone, not even paying attention to the chair that fell at her feet with a clang.

literally with the effects of y/n's quirk, telekinesis, a bunch of desks, clutter, and notebooks lifted into the air and ripped apart, broke down, and crashed down at her subconscious will.

recent news: villains attack u.a. highschool's class 1-a while on a joint rescue simulation with pro heroes thirteen, eraserhead, and all might.

she grasped her phone hard in her hand and she could feel the stares of her classmates, unaware of the news and unaware of her connection to the students. only confusion on their faces at their torn notes and school supplies, y/n as the perpetrator with a ghastly look on her face as she stared at her phone.

with tears streaming down her face, she ran out of her classroom, down the hall dialing katsuki's phone number.

she just had to check her phone in the middle of class. she had to check up on social media in the middle of class and she had to find that news article from 30 minutes ago.

her hands and arms trembled with every move as her legs fell below her, sitting knees on the school tile, not even able to feel the clash of her knees to the ground, neither the bite marks on her cheeks and lips.

ringing lord explosion murder <3...

"l/n-san, what's wrong-" a classmate came out behind her.

"i'm sorry, i'll be in class soon."

"but-"

"it's an emergency. tell sensei i'm sorry."  she spoke through sobs to her bewildered classmate.

call ended..forwarding to voice mail...

"shit!" she dialed again.

katsuki was in class 1-a, and so was izuku. what the hell happened to them? she knew being a hero was going to include death risks, but a couple days into the start of the school year? she thought she would be stronger the next time.

the last time katsuki was in a near-death situation it saved their relationship, but it devastated y/n for awhile until she knew he was okay. the slime monster was a big hurdle and step in their relationship but she didn't know if she could handle him actually dying.

y/n <3: katsuki answer the phone
y/n <3: tell me you're okay please
y/n <3: if you're dead i swear i'll never forgive you

she was hyperventilating at this point, sobbing thinking about all the possibilities. she'd almost lost him before, what if this time it was real?

y/n <3: you're number one remember
y/n <3: you won't let a bunch of deadbeat villains kick your ass
y/n <3: katsuki

she rang his number again, still no reply. another classmate came from the classroom to bring her back in, but seeing the state y/n was in, she went back in and told the teacher. seeing the usually playful and happy y/n l/n like this was something they would never forget. what the hell got her like this?

hyperventilating, sobbing, shaking, trying to call someone as she frantically muttered curse words and a name. y/n looked like she was dying.

y/n <3: answer goddamnit
y/n <3: i can't do this for real
y/n <3: the slime monster was enough you've gone through enough
y/n <3: i don't know what i'm going to do if you're dead
y/n <3: you're number one!!
y/n <3: so please
y/n <3: say something please
y/n <3: katsuki
y/n <3: i'm begging you, please

she called izuku, no reply. her heartbeat was getting faster and faster with every given moment, she couldn't stop the flooding thoughts of her best friend and the man she loved dying at the hands of nameless villains. she held her heart in hopes of making it stop so so she would stop feeling like she was dying. she couldn't get air into her lungs enough to breathe with every given inhale it wasn't enough. her vision was blurred and the pounding in her ears was so loud she couldn't stand it. she gripped her thigh so hard it started bleeding, but she couldn't feel it.

y/n <3: i'm coming to ua

she struggled to get up with the trembling in her legs as they begged to give out. even when her teacher came out and she was taken to the nurse's office she was absentminded. how could she get to him? was he safe? if when she got there he was only a corpse what would she do? she woke up with him in his bed that morning what went wrong? just last night she was holding him with that musky burnt sugar scent and warm hands. his lips that tasted like candy and his sweet nothings in her ear.

her teacher's words were like jello in her ears, she couldn't hear anything over her increasing heartbeat and struggles to keep breathing. she was given an oxygen mask and injected fast-acting sleeping medicine as she laid in the high-tech nurses' office.

the only words the nurse could make out of her gibberish as she spoke rapidly were

"i'll be better katsuki, i'm sorry."

♡ ♡ ♡

ah, i've never had a panic attack before so i tried my best?? idk sorry if i'm offending anyone who has or had panic attacks i rly dunno what i'm doing i tried researching??🥺
edit: i've had multiple since writing this and i don't think i did too awful 😸

i read a hc that katsuki smelled like caramel cos he sweats nitroglycerin but nitroglycerin rly just smells like nasty burnt sugar 😔
i used to buy a shit ton of carmel candies because i wanted to be reminded of him and my breath to smell like him lmao yike 😭😭