Please || Ellie Williams x Reader || The Last Of Us

The Present ~ ♪

"(Y/n)!!"
Ellie yelled as she woke up in a cold sweat. She had been having sleepless nights lately, and when she did sleep, she would have endless nightmares about (y/n) leaving her over and over again..

Ellie sat up from her bed and slightly sweaty pillow. She lifted her knees towards her chest and stuffed her face in her hands. She sat there for what felt like hours— but in reality, it was only a couple minutes

She rested her legs back down and wiped the tears that had fallen on her hands on her bed sheets. The red haired girl peered at the clock next to her bed that showed the time was
'4:30' am

She last woke up at '4:17' meaning it had only been 13 minutes after her last nightmare and hysterical crying session. She understood that most people in her life would leave eventually, but it hurt so much more knowing that (y/n) had left without saying good bye— forever

Ellie had risen from her bed and switched on her lamp close to her. She settled down once again on her plush mattress and grabbed her guitar that was leant up against her bed side table

She strummed the instrument a couple times before leaning a bit to the side to tune the guitar.
She strummed a while before singing the lyrics Joel had once sung to her

"If I ever were to lose you"
"I'd surely lose myself"
"Everything I have found here"
"I've not found by myself"
"Try and sometimes you'll succeed"
"To made this man of me"
"All my stolen missing parts"
"I've no need for anymore"
"Cause I believe.."
"And I believe cause I can see "
"Our future days"
"Days of you and me"

She teared up as she softly sang the lyrics, the lyrics were true
"If I were to ever lose you"
"I'd surely lose myself"

She sighed in defeat and sadness, she rested her arm on the guitar and placed her chin above her arm

"How you doing, kiddo?" A low and gruff voice had spoken. Ellie looked up in slight shock to see Joel standing in the door way with a sad and concerned look upon his features. She had gotten so lost in her own misery and music, she must've missed Joel's sudden appearance

She sighed once again before planting the instrument beside her. She shrugged and shook her head
"I don't know.." she said lowly and confusion clear in her voice.
She sighed again very loudly and stood up suddenly, grasping at her red head of hair and paced back and forth
"I don't know!!" She repeated and raised her voice in anger and confusion

Joel has sighed, just like Ellie did and put the pieces together
Ellie singing the song Joel had sung to her after (y/n)'s death, Confused and clearly sad, distressed and angry..
Joel had dealt with these emotions from Ellie before, it resulted in Joel having to calm Ellie down by hugging her and telling her everything would be okay

It was stressful for Joel, but worth it. He cared so dearly for Ellie and he could definitely understand the feelings she was going through
It was exactly what he felt when he had to let Sarah go..

"Kiddo.."
he said in a very sad and quiet voice..
"Come 'ere.." He spoke gently before motioning towards his arms.
Ellie just stared at the ground before falling into his arms, hysterically crying into his chest and pleading answers to the questions she asked over and over again 'Why didn't I save her!' 'It's my fault' 'Why did she have to leave!?' She desperately gasped for air after every uncontrollable sob left her throat. The tears had completely soaked a large patch of Joel's shirt, he didn't care though, all he cared about was Ellie's well-being.

After roughly half 'n hour of very loud and heart breaking crying, questions that couldn't be answered and the occasional punch in the chest for leaving (y/n) without trying..
Ellie has fallen asleep, once again, in the arms of the man who she saw as a father. The only person who truly has always been there for her. Also known as the man who had left the love of her life to die without trying to save her.

This exact night process continued on ever since (y/n) had left her..
She was broken