*Trigger warning*
Tried to make things better for a gain,
Oh for how much, I longed a change.
Didn't know I was ths one, the universe turned against.
I stand here in the light of day, controlling the urge to hold the blade.
To feel something, maybe pain just once again.
Yearning to feel it's contact, metal to bare skin.
As it scratchs through the surface and tears open my skin.
And the scars which longed to heal, become wounds again.
Can't tell if the sight of blood oozing out, is pleasure or a stain.
Because all I wanna do is, cut again.
Maybe deeper this time, to reach the flesh and relish the pain.
A single tear drop leaves my eyes as the cut opens a portal to all I've lost and the things I couldn't obtain.
I wipe it off and smile through the pain and go back to pretending yet once again.
Fooling me into thinking it was over was just life's game,
And all my efforts just went in vain.
It's like sunshine after the rain,
You feel as if the pain has dried away, but it stays, waiting to break you apart without shame.
It's just a trick so don't fall for it.
But make the most of it while you still can,
Because you don't know how long you have before the cycles starts and depression strikes once again.
Maybe the next time when you call my name,
I won't be able to say "I'm here".
But It's not like you to care,
So don't cry when I can't be there.
But for now I'm gonna lock away the pain, before the mask falls off when the thunder strikes again.
YOU ARE READING
INSIGHT
Poetry"A glimpse inside will scare you away but the ones who really care will choose to stay" ~The words that once struggled to be said, The thoughts that longed to be put into words, The feelings that were tired of being pushed aside, And the emotion...
