Something To Fight For

Something Horrible

We walked around the upstairs where all the cells were. He showed me where we would be sleeping.

"I usually sleep on the bottom bunk but if you want it, you can have it," he said. I smiled slightly and shook my head.

"You can have it. You were here first." He smiled back and began to walk out of our cell. The next thing he showed me was the prison yard. Outside there were quite a few people. They were all gathered around sitting on buckets or on the ground. I looked over to see Rick quite a ways away. It looked like he was farming. I smiled at this. It was like they had had their own little community. Carl nudged me and introduced me to each person. The first person he introduced me to was this blonde headed girl who looked to be a little older than me. She held a baby on her hip and smiled warmly at me. Carl motioned towards me and began talking.

"Beth this is Lucy. Lucy, this is Beth." I smiled back at her and nodded.

"Nice to meet you Lucy. I have a feeling we're gonna be great friends." I smiled even bigger and waved goodbye to her as Carl ushered me to the next person.

"Who was the baby?" I asked him. He looked at me.

"That's my baby sister. Judith." I smiled and nodded.

"That's a beautiful name," I told him. He chuckled and scratched the back of his head.

"Yeah, I came up with it. Was the name of my third grade teacher. Reminds everyone of before." I nodded as we made it to the next person or rather, people. There was a woman who had short brown hair. She resembled Beth a little in the face. She was a little reluctant at first but soon smiled at me. Beside her, was a Korean man. He held her hand tightly.

"Lucy, this is Maggie and Glenn," Carl said. I smiled at the two of them and before I knew it we were on to the next person.

A woman, maybe in her mid-forties, sat drinking from a water bottle. She had gray, short hair that suited her very well. She looked severely tired and worn out. Her eyes had bags underneath them and were red from exhaustion.

"Carol," she said while extending out her hand for me to shake. I hesitated but shook it. Carl looked to me questioningly for hesitating to shake Carol's hand. It was just something about her that had reminded me of someone else. I was sure that he would ask me about it later.

"Lucy," I said smiling at her while shaking her hand back. After we shook hands I walked away and didn't look back at her, leaving Carl behind. When he finally reached me, he looked at me all confused and stopped me, pulling me off to the side away from everyone.

"You okay?" He asked worriedly. I decided if I should tell him the truth. It didn't seem like he was the type to tell anyone's secrets. But, then again, in this new world people could not very easily be trusted. Still, though, they did trust me enough to take me in.

"Carl there's some things you need to know..." He looked at me and scrunched his eyebrows together. I could tell he was thinking of all of the possible bad things I could say. He was studying me intently and I knew at that instant by the look in his eyes that he didn't want it to be bad. He wanted it to be good with everything that he was. Did I actually mean something to somebody? The thought melted my heart and I knew that if I told him what had happened to me, he wouldn't think of me the same. He'd think of me as disgusting or a horrific person. I knew he was looking me in the eyes waiting for me to answer. It looked as if he had looked into my soul, trying to dig the information out himself. What did he see in my eyes? Sadness? Guilt?

"Lucy just tell me. I-I..." He stopped to grab my hand before he continued,"I won't tell anyone." What did I think when he grabbed my hand? I felt wonder, love, understanding. But I was scared at the same time. Not of Carl because I knew he wouldn't hurt me. I was scared because of past experiences. Things that he was asking me to tell him. Things that I didn't know I was ready to talk about it even if could take about.

"Something happened to me..." I said looking off into a far away place. He kept hold of my hand.

"I won't judge you," he said. And I knew at that instant that he wouldn't judge me. And I did. I told him.

*flashback*
We walked into the back room of a log cabin in the middle of no where. It was me, my granddad, and our kidnappers. I was scared. I had no idea what to do. There was no where to go if we did escape because we left our camp. And even if we did escape, we'd have dodge walkers and run far enough away to lose these creeps. But my granddad probably couldn't get very far. Sure he was active and used to work on old tractors, garden, and build houses but he was getting old. When everyone was in the back room, they tied my granddad's hands together and made him kneel. Then, they came and started picking at my clothes, all except one guy who stood behind my granddad. My breathing started to quicken as I realized what they were about to do. My granddad looked down but the guy standing behind him grabbed his chin and forced his head back up. I don't know what was compelling them to be so cruel but it was just plain out wrong and horrible. They took off the rest of my clothes and then tied me up.

They raped me. They raped me with my granddad watching. They raped me until I bled and passed out. The last thing I heard was my granddad scream.

I woke up to the sound of crunching leaves. I looked around suddenly scared at the thought of what had happened. I looked down at myself. I was fully clothed again and I hurt like hell. I looked to my granddad who was carrying me and running as fast as he could.

"Granddad, granddad! I can walk now. I can walk." He stopped and set me down. I started walking but fell down from the painful overload. I looked to my granddad when I heard walker moans.

"Oh no they're gonna get us!" I said to my granddad. He helped me up and told me to run.

"No, I'm not leaving you. You're the only family I have left!" His eyes starting glazing over. He gently pushed me letting me know that his decision was final. I gave him a hug and told him I loved him. I started running when the walkers started to close in on him. He said one last thing.

"Don't look back!" He screamed. It was at that instant that I wondered how many times someone had to tell that to someone they loved. It was too late though. I looked back and I saw them tearing into him. He was looking at me. The whole time. I knelt down and cried while I pulled out a gun that had been on me. I took the safety off and fired. That was the only person I had ever killed. My granddad. The same granddad who used to take me to the imagination station. The same granddad that used to go to my dance recitals and bring me flowers. The same granddad that used to pick me up everyday from school and take me to get a coca cola from the walmart vending machine. The same granddad who watched me get violated. The same granddad who I had saved me. The same granddad who I had killed.