Stirring The Soul

Chapter 1

You wake up gingerly holding your head, keeping your eyes firmly shut, feeling particularly sensitive to the after-effects of last night. Your girlfriends had used their own interpretation of what "low-key celebration" when you instructed them on how you wanted to celebrate your 30th birthday.

You look around to check your surroundings, worried at the possibility of being somewhere you shouldn't be. Oh thank goodness, I'm in my own bed, you think. You look to see if both of your friends made it back with you. You vaguely recall Mia shamelessly allowing some guy to buy her drinks all night, whilst your other friend Layla was being seduced by a man who looked like he'd barely left puberty. You were glad to spend most of the night hidden in a corner, discreetly looking out for your girls, even with the blinking headpiece you were forced to wear that was attracting some unwanted attention.

The night scene in London bores you now. It was fine for when you were twenty-one and naïvely thought you could conquer the world after graduating from the Trinity College of Music (almost ten years ago!) You had imagined yourself meeting trendy artists in these kinds of places with whom you would tour the world. Sadly, the music world was saturated with newly graduated artists who had similar thoughts to yours.

The years passed by and your lofty dreams have almost dwindled into non-existence. And today you find yourself alone in a room with the only two people in the world who matter and who have stuck with you since the age of ten. Whilst they'd helped you to momentarily forget it, the familiar feeling of emptiness is starting to creep back.

Your last serious relationship had ended five years ago. You smile as you remember him. He had been the love of your life and you had looked forward to spending the rest of your lives together. He was your soul mate and best friend. He and you just fit together so well that others were envious of you. Had you known how quickly it would all end, you would have cherished those moments together even more. You wipe a solitary tear as you remember his last days. No matter how frail his body was, his smile could still light up the whole room. When he looked at you, you felt like you were the only one who mattered right there and then. Just when you had let your guard down, fate dealt its cruel cards and took him away from you. At the time, you never thought you'd ever recover from the loss of the love of your life, but somehow, you picked up the pieces of your broken life. In his last moments, he told you not to hold on to the past and let it hold you back. He always had faith in your talents and encouraged you to pursue your dreams. Without him in your life though, that had become difficult to do and simply existing was all you could do. You'd lost the one person who had given your life meaning. And with that loss went your passion and motivation to realise your dreams.

Not having parents or siblings, you are grateful for the two friends who never left your side and with their strength to help you, you even managed to find a job that you find fulfilling. Teaching music to children with special needs is highly rewarding and fills you with joy on a daily basis. If Mark had been there, he would have been proud of you no matter what you did.

You let out a sad sigh and slowly get out of bed. You decide to let the girls sleep while you head to the bathroom. A hearty breakfast will everyone feel better.

There are still a few days before the new term starts and you want to use this time to prepare for the new academic year. Your friends try in vain to persuade you to spend the last few days of the summer holidays hanging out with them with a care-free attitude.

"Come on Anna, you're starting a brand new decade! Don't you want to see what's out there before you get tied down with school work?" Layla asks in desperation. They are both lying around lazily on the living floor rug, making themselves very comfortable.

"Er, I caught a glimpse of what's out there last night and I have no interest in exploring any more, thank you very much. I'm happy to carry on as I have done for the last few years, being that epitome of an amazing human being whom I know you admire and very much aspire to be," you tease in reply. You all laugh at your attempt at self-lauding.

"Look, why don't we compromise? I'll spend the whole day today with you; we can Netflix, stay in our jammies, order take-out, gossip about what the guys we (you) met last night and enjoy doing nothing," you suggest.

"Only if we order pizza from that place with that cute delivery guy," Mia says excitedly.

The next 24 hours are much more to your liking and within your comfort zone. You're the introvert of your group and your home is your sanctuary. You love the girls' company, but you also like your time spent alone. You enjoy coming up with new ways to engage your students with your subject. Music is something that everyone can enjoy, regardless of ability. Whether it's simply listening to it, singing, playing an instrument, composing, or even keeping a rhythm, music always finds its way into your heart. Mark used to sing to you and his voice always stirred your soul as no-one else could. He didn't need any instruments or accompaniments; his voice was enough to enrapture its audience.

After staying the night, Mia and Layla both leave around midday the next day. Both of them work for the same advertising firm and took time off at the same time so you could all enjoy your birthday together. But celebrations were over now and you were happy to get back to your usual routine. Being twenty-nine and thirty didn't seem that all that different.