The years passed by and your lofty dreams have almost dwindled into non-existence.....the familiar feeling of emptiness is starting to creep back. Will this person who has suddenly been thrown into your life be the one to bring the light back into y...
You walk into your classroom, place your bags on the table, and take a few moments to appreciate the stillness. The start of a new half term usually looks like this; clean room, furniture neatly arranged, musical equipment stored away in their rightful place; all ready to use for the next eight weeks. You love the 'look' of a new term as it feels like a clean slate and fresh start. You sigh deeply, glad to have come out of the other side of an emotionally and physically draining last few days.
You involuntarily check your phone and then remember that you've muted and archived his messages. You couldn't bring yourself to delete all trace of him on your phone, but you didn't take any of his calls that day. When it kept ringing, you had to tell Layla to take your phone and keep it somewhere secret from you. You knew that you needed to break all communication with Jungkook and this was the only way to do it. It was the constant care and attention from Mia and Layla that finally helped you come through the deep and intense sorrow you felt. You felt like you were in mourning again and you missed him so much. You were hoping the memories would fade over time, but of course, they haven't.
The cull from communication is what has allowed you to stand in your classroom now, ready to get your students prepared for the Christmas recital. You know he left for Seoul a few days ago and maybe back in London now to collect the rest of his things, but you plan to keep yourself too busy to have any chance run-ins. You knew the risk when you allowed yourself to invite Jungkook into your heart, but you never foresaw how deep you'd fall. Nor did you realise the effect your relationship could have on his career or that of his hyungs. You hadn't planned to break up with Jungkook that fateful day, but Jimin meeting with you, on top of Jim's warning, was the catalyst to do the necessary. You couldn't prolong the hurt that Jungkook would feel. This break was the best decision for everyone, even if it meant you both endured unspeakable heartache.
You let out one more sigh before psyching yourself up for the new start. You're excited to meet the students and get ready for the recital.
The week passes by without event and you keep yourself so busy that thoughts of Jungkook never surface. You stay late after school to preoccupy yourself knowing there will be the inevitable burnout, but it's more manageable than thinking of Jungkook. Lunch is over and this afternoon signals the first of the weekly practice sessions in the main hall for the Christmas recital. The kids are excited today as it's their first rehearsal outside the classroom. You are busy instructing them on where to position themselves on stage. You know that you have to do this quickly before they lose interest. You get the eighteen students in their right place and stand back. You make some adjustments because of their height and then get ready to start. You have a strong instrumental group; one student at the piano, five students poised with their violins, a couple of flutists and clarinetists. The rest of the students make up the choir.
The instrumentalists starting to play random notes and the singers are getting restless. "Ms Murilo, when can we start?" "I think I need the loo." "Ugh I think I ate too many chips for lunch, my tummy hurts." "Miss, my reed has split." "Miss, I can't tune my violin."
You normally have a teaching assistant to help you, but today she's off sick, so you deal with the interruptions yourself. "Tom, you can go to the loo, but if you're not back in 5 minutes, I'm taking you out the choir and giving you a triangle instead. Shazia, drink some water, you'll be fine. Polly, grab another reed from the box on that table, Arif, please play the D major chord for Jake to tune to. And we will start as soon as Tom comes back," you say, looking at him as he dashes to the toilet. You check that everyone has scores to follow. Tom is back before his allotted time and you instruct everyone to get ready to start singing and playing on your count. You raise your arms and say, "1,2,3,4....," but you hear nothing except the piano. You immediately turn around wondering why Arif is playing something completely different to what's in front of him. You freeze when you see who has replaced Arif on the piano.
"JK," you whisper.
"Hi Noona," says Jungkook, sitting on the old piano stool as though he'd always been there. "I'm your assistant today, so just tell me what you need and I'll do it," he says casually.
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You become short of breath momentarily, then realising that all the students are watching your reaction, you recover quickly and say, "Mr Jeon, thank you for helping us today. Everyone, please say hello to Mr Jeon."
You quickly decide what to do while the kids chant their greeting in unison. You hear whispers of "omg he's so cute, he's so tall, I think he likes Mr Murilo, they would make such a cute couple, did he call her noona? Maybe cos it's after 12 o'clock now."
"Mr Jeon you can listen to the musicians and see if anyone needs support while I concentrate on the choir," you say, although how you will concentrate on anything, you don't know.
The students practise with new vigour, eager to please the new teaching assistant. After an hour or so, it's almost time for the bell to ring to signal the end of the school week. You tell the students to pack their things and line up against the door, ready to be dismissed. One student raises her hand, "Miss, will Mr Jeon be joining us every Friday?"
"No," you say, while Jungkook says, "Sure!"
You glance at him and quickly repeat, "No, Lisa, Mr Jeon sadly is only here for today as he needs to go back to South Korea soon. But we do appreciate all his help today, don't we?" The bell rings and the students pile out, thanking Jungkook as they leave. Once they've all left, you swiftly walk towards the stage, tidying things away, avoiding Jungkook since you can't bring yourself to say anything.
"Noona," he says after you, quietly. "Are you not going to talk to me?"
You just shake your head; there are tears pricking your eyes and you frantically wipe them away. You hear him coming next to you, but he doesn't touch you. You are in turmoil as part of you wants to hug him tight, while the other wants to curse him for turning up like this. You turn around suddenly and say, "Why are you here? I was just starting to move on. How could you be so selfish and come here like this? What gives you the right to come here uninvited?"
