Gangstress

May 1999 (1)

***Marshall's POV***

It had been almost a month since I broke up with Angel, and honestly it was one of the worst pains I had ever felt in my entire fucking life. Not even breaking up with Kim hurt this bad, because Kim had always done something that made me not give a fuck. But Angel never did anything except love me, and give me affection. 

Even though I was walking around heart broken as fuck, I couldn't let that shit show. Kim would have fuckin' bit my head off if she knew I was upset about it, so I just had to shove that shit down as deep as I could. 

Things with Kim had been alright, but not great. I don't think things were ever really 'great' with us, but they were tolerable. The only thing that really made this all worth it for me was having my family back. Even when me and Kim were having a bad day, it was still worth it to me to be a family again. Just me, her, and Hailie. All I had ever wanted. 

We had also been talking about seriously getting married, since things between us had been relatively good. She seemed pretty adamant about it, and told me that she didn't get back together with me just to continue being my girlfriend. I wasn't super into the idea of marrying Kim, but I agreed with her. If we were gonna be together again we should really be taking the next step. 

I also wanted to marry Kim for Hailie. I wanted her to have married parents, and not just parents constantly in and out of a relationship with one another. I figured if we were married, it would put more seriousness on the relationship as well, which I thought might be helpful to keep us more stable. 

Even though I agreed to marry Kim, I felt really guilty. She wanted to get married as soon as possible, but I knew that was just gonna crush Angel even more when she found out and I was honestly sick of hurting her. I had no idea how she had been handling it, but I didn't imagine it was well. I decided to just put those feelings aside, since Kim kept pestering me about getting married, so I just agreed to go down to the courthouse next month and marry her before I went on warped tour.

I had boughten a huge ass fuckin' house in Detroit, so we were finally trying to start to process of getting custody of Alaina and Nate. They had both been living with us since we moved in, which was exactly what I wanted, but we just needed the legal aspect of it so that my mom or Dawn couldn't try and take them back. 

I had also boughten an apartment in LA, since I had been going there so much and I fuckin' hated staying in hotels all the time. It had kinda turned into a place for us all to just get fucked up though, but I didn't mind. We could all do drugs and get high as shit there without worrying about the cops being called on us, so that's all I cared about. 

I was currently on my way to the airport to fly back to LA, but before we left, I got the driver to stop at my mailbox so I could grab my mail. I quickly grabbed the single envelope that was sitting in my box and hopped back in the car. 

I looked at it and I saw it was a letter from Angel. "What the fuck?" I mumbled to myself. I ripped the envelope open and it was just a cheque. The dollar amount was equivalent to what I had paid for the extra lawyer to help get Aidan out of jail. 

My eyes scanned the paper and I saw the memo line had something written in her handwriting that I always thought was so pretty. All it read was "It's blood money now, baby." I felt a shiver run down my spine and all of a sudden I was back to having a little 5'4, 120 pound girl intimidating me. "Is she gonna fuckin' kill me?" I mumbled again. 

I really didn't think she would go that far, but what the fuck could that mean? I felt so fuckin' nervous about what the hell she was gonna try and do. Was she gonna try and diss me? That seems more plausible, and if it happens, then it happens, and honestly I deserved it. But I still didn't know that for sure. 

We finally reached the plane and thankfully, all the boys were already there and waiting for me. I stuffed the cheque in my duffle bag and figured I'd ask their opinions. I especially wanted Denaun's. He's gotta know somethin', since he was still seein' Zoe. 

I walked on the plane and dapped them all up and found my seat. "Ayo, Porter! Y'know anythin' 'bout this?" I pulled the cheque outta my bag and handed it to him. 

"It's just a cheque from Angel? She's just payin' ya back. I imagine for the lawyers?" He started handing it back to me. 

"Nah! Look at the fuckin' memo line!" 

He brought it back and read it. I saw him laugh slightly. "Is she tryna fuckin' kill ya, bro?" 

"I don't know! You don't know anythin' 'bout it?!" 

"Nah, bro." He shook his head and Proof yanked the cheque outta Porter's hand. 

"What's goin' on?" He questioned. 

"The fuckin' memo line, bro." 

I saw his eyes widen. "Oh yeah. You's a dead man walkin'." He passed it to Biz, who passed it to Swifty, who passed it to Kuniva and they all agreed. 

"Ya'll don't think she'd actually do anything?" 

"We weren't the ones fuckin' her, dawg. You'd know better than anyone else." Swifty said. 

"Why ya always get involved with such crazy bitches?" Biz laughed. 

"I don't! She's not! I didn't think. Fuck, I don't know." I sighed. 

"Why don't ya just call her?" Porter suggested. 

I nodded. "Yeah, that's a good idea." I whipped out my cellphone and found her contact. Fuck, I ain't talked to her in so long. I had no idea if she was gonna answer. I mean I wouldn't. But aside from the cheque, I also just wanted to hear her voice. I got up and went to the back of the plane so I could have some privacy, in case we ended up actually talking. 

I pressed 'talk' on her contact and I immediately got an automated voice saying the user was no longer in service. I decided to try her house phone and see if I got through on that one, but it just gave me the same message. I felt my heart sink a little bit when I realized that meant she changed both of her numbers. Now, even if I wanted too, I couldn't talk to her at all. 

I sauntered back to my seat and slumped down in it. "She answer?" Proof questioned me. 

"She changed her fuckin' number, bro." I said sadly. 

"Did ya try her house?" He asked again. 

I nodded. "Yup. She changed 'em both." 

"Fuck doody, I'm sorry." He patted my shoulder. 

"I ain't even give a fuck 'bout the cheque now. I just can't believe she would go that far." 

He nodded. "I know, it's fucked up." 

"She definitely gonna try and kill ya." Biz laughed again and I shot him the middle finger. 

"Whatever. I fuckin' deserve it anyway." I slumped down further in my seat.

All of a sudden the plane started to take off and I was no longer interested in talking to anybody. I just put my seat back and closed my eyes. I tried to sleep but Angel's smile kept flashing through my brain. I could hear her laugh so perfectly that I swore at one point she was actually beside me. 

I honestly had no idea if I would ever be able to completely lose feelings for her. She had this fuckin' hold on me and I was totally engulfed in her. I missed her so much. I loved her so much. I hated that this was how we had to end, but I promised myself I would never forget about her, and how she made me feel. I could never forget that even if I wanted too. Those memories were far too powerful.