Norman x Reader || SAUDADE

22-A-dversity

"All the gates are locked!" I exclaimed after trying to pry open each one of them. 

"Wait, there's one up there!" Emma pointed to a little window on the second storey. 

Ray and I immediately formed a hand-to-hand to create a 'trampoline projection' as a kind of leverage for Emma's jump. She ran to us preparing herself to be propelled into the height. She managed to land effortlessly just in front of the window. She then helped Ray and I up afterwards. We entered the palace through that passage and crept silently inside of it, trying to stay cautious of possible demons lurking around. I was surprised to see almost nobody was guarding around the palace at such times. At least that's what I thought, before Ray pointed to the demon bodies piled up along the main gate of the castle. I almost hurled up at the sight of mangled demons before my eyes. Norman's plan of getting the Geelan clan to attack the royals must have worked accordingly. This was not the casualty humans can do to demons, most of their heads were gone, probably eaten. I shivered at the thought. Emma and Ray snapped me out of it before we rushed to what seemed like the throne area. It was closed behind a huge grand door, conveniently stationed where people can bask in its glory any time. 

I gulped, "This must be the throne room." I furrowed my brows at the sight of blood seeping through the small gaps of the doors. 

Emma wasted no time and flung the doors open. There we saw the boy who orchestrated the whole eradication to no flaw, towering regally over a royalty with a huge sword pierced through her head. And what weakened my legs, were the sight of even more piles of dismantled demons scattered around in between us and Norman. The horrible stench was too overbearing for any of us to breathe in comfortably, along with the bloody coated walls and floors. I felt nauseous at all the frightening sight before me, that I needed to cover my mouth to prevent myself from hurling my stomach out. My eyes met Norman's for a split second, the glint of fear and doubt in his eyes was cracking though the iron-mask he was wearing constantly, before he looked away. 

Ray sensed my displeasure and immediately shielded me from the view, "Are you feeling okay?" He asked me worried that I might drop flat to the ground at any moment. 

"I just need time, nothing I can't manage." I answered breathlessly.

"Good, the three of you managed to come back safely. But, I'm sorry, you're a bit too late." Norman smiled at us with his iron-mask once again. 

"Norman! Let's-let's stop this okay? We succeeded in making the promise with him. Everyone can get to the human world safely!" Emma smiled while taking several steps towards Norman. 

"You don't have to fight anymore, so let's stop this eradication okay?" Emma continued. 

"The reign of the Imperial rule has collapsed, it's impossible for the demons to self-govern now. We can't make peace with them." Norman reasoned. 

"We put a crack on this world. The demons will go die off. Just a bit more time before they go extinct. We can't turn back now. Eradication is the only option, do not get in the way Emma." His expression darkened, it serves as a warning for us to not do anything reckless and test him. 

"No!" Emma's voice rang, startling everyone in the room. 

"I don't understand why we have to murder when there's no need. And I don't want you to be a killer for it. Let's find a way, even if it's impossible. No matter how difficult, we can't give up, it's never too late." She refused to back down. 

I looked at Norman's unbending resolve reflected on his face. 

"I've decided that I won't let you kill yourself anymore." Emma yelled loudly. 

I felt all of my senses spiked up throughout the whole slaughter-journey we've been through. 

"What are you talking about?" Norman smiled reassuringly at us. 

"I said I won't go anywhere anymore." He said softly. 

"You liar!" I felt myself burst at his statement. 

My ears were ringing and I could feel pulsing throughout my body, I tried to get a proper grip on myself to prevent me from collapsing. 

I laughed a little bitterly, "Who are you fooling again? We are family, we grew up together. We can see through you. You're suffering right now aren't you?" I raised my voice a little. 

Norman, Ray and Emma seemed to be taken aback at my sudden outburst. I've never really scolded anyone let alone raise my voice my whole life. 

"You have the intelligence so you chose the most certain path and you're kind, very kind, that you shouldered all the burden on your own. But, you don't want any of this... slaughtering or annihilation." I continued. 

"Norman, don't lie to us, or to yourself, tell us everything. What are you afraid of?" I clenched my fist at his adamant behaviour of masking everything away. 

He smiled a little at my words, "Afraid?" He asked me. 

"Because, to me, your mask is slipping away. Cracking gradually, and right now you look like a small child shaking in fear." With that, his eyes widened momentarily. 

"Stop it! I've come this far, and I don't intend to turn back." He said sternly. 

"This time, this time I'm not letting you go!" I felt my body move on its own, my legs took me towards him very swiftly. 

"________!" I can hear Ray's confused voice behind me. Not sure what to do, I felt all the emotions drowning myself in the spur of the moment. 

"You jerk!" I prepared my hands intending to slap some sense out of him, and for trying to harm Mujika and Sonju before me. 

He readied himself for the slap that's coming his way, but I felt myself unable to land anything on him. He's trembling, he does not want this at all too. I ended up pulling him into a tight hug and there I felt myself sob into the warmth he was giving. He was staying too still, unable to process anything I did to him. I can feel Emma and Ray closed in to the both of us, but I was too overwhelmed with the sudden reaction I was giving today. 

"You're stronger and kinder than anyone, but at the same time you're also arrogant and a coward. You're not alone anymore, believe in us more will you? Spew it all out!" I felt his arms around me as Emma took his hands. 

"Don't try and act cool and keep it all inside." Ray added. 

"We're family, siblings, and best friends. We don't want a future where you're going to suffer. No matter what the result it brings." He sighed at his best friend's idiocy. 

I can feel him trembling against me in shock of everything that happened. 

"You don't know anything about what I've done. I-I can't. I'm already at the point beyond saving. I don't deserve to walk with you." Norman bowed his head down. 

"We know about everything." Emma said as a matter of factly. 

"The poisons, Mujika and Sonju, and also that experiment underground." Ray pointed out a list he had. 

"It's not too late, we can still do something about it. It's okay if you're weak, none of us is strong, that's who we really are. But then, we'd struggle and laugh together. Let's live together Norman, this time for sure." Emma and Ray joined in the hug. 

Norman started to cry into the hug, and I can tell everyone is also getting emotional against the hug.

********Author's corner: 

Thank you for making it this far! This chapter was the most emotional one I've written so far. This part of the manga also gets me every single time :'(. Well, I hope you're enjoying it up to this point. I do apologize for any mistakes I have made throughout the series!