I Was One Of Them (Virgil's Past)

Chapter 1

A/N: It's probably obvious but this is set before Accepting Anxiety, just so no one is confused

edit: i made some changes to the future story line so the main ship is Analogical

TW: hateful speech, slapping, cussing, mention of bruises (there will probably be cussing in every chapter tbh, sorry patton)

I bolted upright in my bed, breathing heavily from my nightmare. I hugged myself, trying to relax and even out my breathing, only succeeding after a few minutes. I hesitantly got out of bed, flinching in pain from the bruises I had gotten from the day prior. I snapped my fingers to change into my regular black hoodie, and quietly left my room. I stepped out into the dimly lit hallway and shut my door silently behind me. Holding my breath, I made my way down the hall.

As I entered the kitchen that was in the middle of the Lights and Darks, I noticed the room was empty and let out a sigh of relief. I padded across the kitchen tile and quietly opened the fridge, taking out the milk. I grabbed a bowl and poured myself a small amount of cereal. Sitting quietly in the dining room eating my cereal, I was thankful I was the only one awake this early.

As if some higher being that hated me was reading my mind, I flinched at the sudden sound of a door opening on the Light side. I froze, trying to be as quiet as possible from my spot in the dining room. From where I sat I saw Princy walk tiredly to the fridge, pulling out the milk to make himself a cup of coffee.

Shit, I thought, It just had to be that asshole this early in the morning. I looked down at my bowl, seeing that I had finished the last of the cereal and sighed quietly. Well I'm gonna have to get up eventually anyways.

I rose from my seat and made my way slowly into the kitchen, holding my finished bowl of cereal. Roman turned around to see who it was and immediately looked disgusted upon seeing that it was me. "Oh," he said with a glare, "It's the embodiment of a dark and stormy night." I ignored him and began washing my bowl and spoon in the sink next to him.

Seemingly annoyed at my ignorance, he quickly reached over, slamming his hand down on the sink faucet to turn it off, causing me to flinch. "I was talking to you, Marilyn Morose."

I sighed and reached over to turn the water back on, not wanting to deal with him at the moment. I gasped and dropped my bowl into the sink as his hand clamped down onto my extended arm, and I turned to my right to see him with a pissed-off expression on his face.

"W-what?" I stuttered out.

"Oh so now you can fuckin' speak."

I stood quietly, unsure of what he even wanted from me. I was just trying to wash my dishes for fuck sake.

"You know what," he said through clenched teeth, "I'm tired of putting up with a damn disorder!" Suddenly I'm met with a hand as I get slapped hard enough to make me fall painfully to the ground infront of Roman. I look up at him with wide eyes and he glares down at me angrily.

"I don't understand why you even exist! All you do is cause Thomas unneeded worry, which hinders him from doing any of my ideas!" I shook from where I was frozen on the ground, unsure of what I should do.

"W--" I started to attempt to calm him down, but was interrupted as he exclaimed, "No, you shut it and listen to me, Anxiety. Before you came around we got along just fine, but then as soon as you popped up, Thomas suddenly has more problems! And I'm pretty damn sure that isn't some coincidence. All you are is a disorder, you aren't an important side like me, Logic, or Morality. Hell, at least the other dark sides aren't disorders. Why do you even exist? Do you just enjoy stopping Thomas from doing anything he enjoys? Huh?!"

By this point I had silent tears streaming down my face as I hugged my arms protectively. I didn't even have anything to say. He was right after all. What good am I? They're better off without me even existing. De and Remus constantly remind me of what a mistake I am, but I held on solely because I had some small hope that the Lights might see at least some good in me. Guess I was wrong to even let that thought cross my mind.

As I sat there in silence crying, Roman scoffed and said, "That's what I thought." He then grabbed his coffee and walked back to the Light side. I remained on the ground quietly, afraid to even move for fear that something would happen. After a few minutes, though, I rose shakily from the ground and wiped my tears with the sleeves of my black jacket. I sighed, holding back the sea of tears that I had yet to cry, and finished washing my dishes in silence.