☾𝑙𝑖𝑓𝑒𝑙𝑒𝑠𝑠☾ ☾𝚢𝚊𝚖𝚊𝚐𝚞𝚌𝚑𝚒☾

Chapter 2

let me remind you guys to vote....🤔  Yamaguchi woke to the blaring sound of his alarm. It felt like his head was pounding. It was 5:40 am. He didn't want to get up and go to morning practice. Not after what had happened last night. He stared at the ceiling while thinking up an excuse for the bruises incase anyone saw.        He forced himself out of bed and walked to the bathroom. He didn't wanna look at himself in the mirror knowing he couldn't handle it. He slowly took  his clothes off and filled up the tub. He sat there with his arms over his legs. It took a while to wash off all the dried up blood on him. When he got out of the tub he dried himself carefully with a towel while wincing  at the stinging pain in his chest.      He tried to put bandages around his chest and torso as best as he could. He looked up at the mirror disgusted at his face. All he could see was dark bags under his eyes and his sickly pale skin. He looked down at his body. It was disgusting. He was fat. Any normal person could see that Yamguchi was not fat at all but underweight. Not that he could see it. It didn't look like Tadashi anymore. He looked like a stranger. He tried to hold in his tears but he couldn't. They slowly started running down his cheeks. He wiped his tears and slowly mutters "pathetic". He put a towel around his waist and quietly ran to his room to not wake up his dad.     Yamaguchi put on his school uniform and stuffed his practice clothes and shoes in his bag. He looked at his arms where you could still see the self inflicted scars that were healing. He grabbed his bag and went downstairs. He didn't wanna eat food knowing if his dad found out he wasted the small amount of food there was he would be in trouble. He shouldn't eat it anyway. He was fat and food made him that way. He went over his calorie count yesterday so he decided he wouldn't eat for a couple days. Yamaguchi wasn't poor but middle class. It was that his dad didn't care about buying food. He only got as much as they needed or so he thought. But it was always little. He wasted most of his money on alcohol and drugs. His dad reeked of it every night he came home from practice. Yamaguchi ran out of the door and grabbed his bike. He hopped on and rode to tsuki's house. He would always wanna walk to school with tsuki. When he got to tsuki's house he saw him about to walk off and put on a fake smile before riding up to him. "Hey tsuki!" Yamaguchi said as he got off his bike. "Hey" replies Tsukishima. "What's wrong you look tired" Tsukishima said. "Nothing I just didn't get enough sleep that's all" Yamaguchi said. They remained silent while walking the rest of the way to school. When they got there they saw Hinata and Kageyama racing to school as they always did. Kageyama won this time. When we got inside the club room. Ennoshita, Daichi and suga were in there changing. They all gave him glances when they saw how different he looked. Yamaguchi pretended not to notice. Tsukishima went to his locker and started to change.  P.O.V -yamaguchi  I sat in the corner of the room waiting for everyone to leave before I changed. Daichi seemed like he noticed and said "aren't you gonna change yamaguchi" "Yea sorry" I said. I open my bag as slowly as I could without being too suspicious and grab my clothes and volleyball shoes out. They all left as soon as they finished changing so I quickly took off my shirt and put my long sleeve shirt on. I wore long sleeved shirts these days to cover the scars on my wrists. I should probably do them somewhere else like my thighs so I won't have to worry about anyone seeing them as much.  I changed into my pants and walked out of the club room and down to the  gym. I put on my extra bright fake smile then opened the door the the gym. When I walked in I saw Tanaka and Noya running up to Kiyoko. I quietly giggled. Hinata and Kageyama were practicing their quick attack like usual. I ran up to tsuki. "Hi tsuki do we have a practice game today?" Tsuki turned and stared at me. "No we don't why?" I looked at my feet. "No reason!".          We just started practice. I could feel the stinging on my back from when my dad threw a beer bottle at me last night. We were going to split the team up to play. I was on a team with Suga, Daichi, Nishanoya and Tsuki. We were playing against Hinata, Kageyama, Asahi, Tanaka and Ennoshita. I missed most of the receives that were tossed at me. Tsuki looked pissed and the others looked slightly annoyed but tried to hide it. It hurt. It hurt my heart and made me feel like I wasn't good enough. I wasn't anyway. I felt tears bottling up in my eyes. I held them back and tried to focus on practice. It was my turn to serve and I knew I had to make it. I held the ball in my hand jumped and hit it. It was out of bounds and the other players got a point. Thoughts started filling up his head. (Bold texts are thoughts)  So pathetic no one likes you  that's not true  Yes it is they all hate you, everyone does  No...  You should just cut yourself it will make you fell better  but I can't your lying they don't hate me  Do it you no you want to come on  .....  Do it you pathetic piece of shit  no.  I spaced off for a bit and suga noticed. "Hey yamaguchi focus you ok?" I turned to suga with tears running down my cheeks. " yea sorry Suga" I quickly wiped my tears hoping he didn't notice them. But he did.       When practice ended I ran to the club room to get there ahead of everyone and quickly changed my shirt into my school shirt. Everyone started to walk in. Suga was heading my way "hey yamaguchi are you ok it looked like you were crying earlier" I looked around to see if anyone heard but no one did " no I'm fine sorry for bothering you"  "Don't say sorry it's ok yamaguchi". Suga was always smiling. I admired him for that and all I could do was fake smile. It was pathetic. I changed into my pants and walked out to go to class.       I had class with kageyama first. He sat in the first seat on the 5th row. I sat on the 3 seat in the 4th row so we were kinda close. We didn't talk much though. He wouldn't really talk with anyone anyway. I put my head down and started to doze of to sleep.  Dream: "NO, get out leave me alone he left because of you" "mom, I'm sorry please forgive me" "you little bitch did you not hear me! HUH DID YOU NOT I SAID GET OUT YOU FUCKING WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT"  I ran out with tears running down my cheeks. End of dream  I shot my head up and my breath quickened. I look around to see if anyone saw me and saw kageyama staring at me with a confused and worried look. I look away embarrassed and notice their were tears running down my face. Class ended and my other classes went by quickly with only a few people glancing at me.      It was time for practice but I didn't wanna go. I wouldn't be of much help even if I did go. I can't receive or serve good anyway. They won't care. Right?      I think I should just go home. I walked past the gym and grabbed my bike hanging on the rack. I hopped on and started to ride home. When I got home I put my bike in the garage and slowly opened the door. It spelled like cigarettes and beer. I knew my dad was home. I was just hoping he didn't have to much beer like he usually does. I walked in and quietly went towards the stairs.  "Your not gonna say i'm home Tadashi?" I turned and faced my dad. "I'm home" There was a couple of beer bottles on the ground. "Your home earlier than usual" I looked at my feet. "There wasn't any practice today" "Really" he said in a weird tone. He walked up to me and I slowly backed away a few steps. He grabbed by arm and kissed me shoving his way in. I reacted to quickly and bit on his tongue. He screamed. "OW that really hurt Tadashi and here I was gonna go easy on you" "guess that won't be happening". He balled his hand into a fist and at that moment I knew I had fucked up. --------------------------- Sorry to leave you on a cliff hanger kinda.... Anyway I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and PLEASE tell me if you guys have any suggestions I'll be happy to take any!! Oh and tell me who you want to be the first person who starts to find out about yamaguchi! Tell me if this chapter is too long or too short please:)  Word Count: 1,548