Fervent Love / Reece Bibby (stereo kicks)

Chapter 10 - how i was unsure

I woke up the sound of someone restling pans downstairs. Probably chris making breakfast. I grab my phone and check the lock screen. There was a text from jack,

Jack: miss u already xx

All the memories from yesterday came flooding back. I had sex with Jack. I didn't regret it, but I felt bad, not sure why. I got up and hoped into the shower. I slipped into grey sweats and a white tank top. I let my hair down and walked down stairs. 

'Good morning' I said walking into kitchen. I was right, chris was cooking up a storm. I sat down next to Jake, who was sitting next to tom. 

'where did you disappear to yesterday?' he asked

'i.. dunno can't really remember' I lied giving him a weak smile, I didn't really want everyone to know. Chris shot me a look and smiled. Well, he obviously remembered. 

Chris handed me a plate with everything on it. As we started eating Reece walked in hungover as ever. I felt nervous to talk to him. Nervous, guilty & mad. 

'Well well if it isn't the boy who got lucky yesterday' Tom said laughing

'Oh shutup' Reece said punching his arm

I guess that meant he did have sex with Olivia then. I wondered if he knew about me & Jack. He looked at me softly, I could tell he felt guilty as well. 

'I'm not really hungry, I'm gonna go for a walk' I said getting up

'but wait, i haven't even given you my special eggs yet!!' chris said whining

'I'll eat them later yeah?' i replied quickly

I walked out and grabbed my jacket. I put on my beanie and slipped into my vans. I heard someone coming out to the door, and because I didnt want to talk to anyone I quickly slipped out of the door into the cold morning air. It was so cold, but it felt so nice. I started down the road and reached the park where me and reece first talked. I sat down on the bench and sighed. We've really fucked it up now. 

I heard footsteps and I half wished, half dreaded it was Reece. I turned to see him coming over, he was wearing a big white jumper and grey sweats, like me. He sat next to me on the bench without saying anything.

I looked over at him and he looked back. 

'Listen, about yesterday, I'm really sorry, I dunno what I was thinking I shouldn't have hit him'

I broke our gaze and looked at the ground in front of me. Was I meant to forgive him now? or stay mad at him?

'It's okay' I said, not sure if i meant it

He slid closer to and put his arm around me pulling me in.

I could feel his heartbeat, I could hear his breathing. I felt so close to him and I liked it. 

'Come on lets go back before chris cries because we haven't eaten his breakfast' he laughed grabbing my hands 

I laughed and got up, We held hands the whole way back. 

'did you clean jack up yesterday?' Reece asked as we turned reaching our street

'Yeah i did' I said starting to feel awkward

'Why did it take you so long to come down then? I was waiting for you' 

I didn't know what to say, should I tell him?

'We um we did things' I said quietly

He let go of my hand. 'What things?' He asked getting angry

I looked at him, he knew the answer. I continued walking hoping he'd instantly forget about it. He grabbed my arm 'Rae what things?' He asked looking deep into my eyes

'Everything reece' I said taking his hands

'Are you fucking joking?' he said suddenly getting angry, ripping his hands from mine

I got angry as well. 'Are you kidding me? you're one to talk, you had sex with olivia as well???' I asked

'Thats different' He said bluntly starting to walk off

'What do you mean different? it's the same fucking thing.' I said

he turned 'It didn't mean anything, thats why its different i know you like jack' 

I felt bad now, because me and Jack did mean something. I did genuinely like him. 

Reece had put his head in his hands. I really hurt him. I walked up behind him and hugged him. 

'reece i'm sorry' I said 

He turned and hugged me. I heard him sniffle a bit, he was crying oh god.

He pulled away from the hug and looked at me, puffy eyed. 

'Listen I just really like you okay'

'If you liked me why did you get with olivia?' I asked

'I didn't want you to think I was being clingy or anything' 

I raised my eyebrows 'Reece..I like you, I'm not going to think you're clingy okay?' he nodded and pulled me back into a hug. He pulled back and gently kissed me. Lightly because his lip was little cut from yesterday.

'So are we okay now or??' I said asking him

'Yeah we are but what do we do now? we both get mad when we see other people..'

I didn't really understand if he was asking me to exclusive so I wasn't sure what to say. 'Do you only want to see each other then?' I asked sounding hopeful

'What about jack?' he spat back which kind of annoyed me

'I mean it's not like we're in love' I replied, I really wasn't too sure on what to say

He grabbed my shoulders and looked me dead in the eyes, 'let's only see each other then yeah?' without waiting for a reply he leaned forward and kissed my forehead. I did like him and I want to be exclusive but I thought about Jack and how I liked him as well. I was horrible at boys.