Stockholm Syndrome //Adam Driver

fifteen

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Two Weeks Later

After the apology, and Adam's confession you spent a couple of weeks getting to know Adam without provoking him. You decided that it wasn't helping to keep forcing him into creating distance between you when you both knew it wasn't what you wanted. This short two week time period you gave yourself time to treat him like a normal human being. Reinstating the life your relationship had before, but still keeping that additional mental block to keep yourself in one piece. You kept reminding yourself of your situation to guarantee you wouldn't lose yourself tangled up in too many emotions at one time. You didn't want to put everything in the past but you were tired of having the same conversation with Adam over and over again. In the beginning, all you wanted was answers but you couldn't think of anymore. It sort of saddened you how you've already stopped fighting. It made you feel like you gave up. So to satisfy yourself you played nice with Adam but not too nice. There hasn't been a kiss threat after disclosing to you why he did what he did. You thought it was all too overwhelming. Nothing made sense but yet it made perfect sense. 

Get it together!

Swimming back into the real world you focus on what Adam's doing. Which is installing a miniature fridge in the basement for you. It was just one of the many things he would add to the room. If you'd get hungry and he wasn't around you could get some refrigerated snacks. He already kept other things for you to eat down here this was just the next step. You watched him effortlessly carry the box down the stairs, leaving the door open because he had to use both arms to carry it. You stared at the exit, but you resisted making a run for it. Confused as to why you were so hesitant, your brain filled itself with thoughts. As much as you wanted to get out of there, your feet felt like they were glued to the floor. Adam looked at you and then to the door. 

"Now don't do something you're gonna regret." Adam's voice echos in your brain. You heard his voice but you kept your eyes on the open door. Adam sat the box down by the side of the staircase and stepped over to you. You ignored him and thought about your options. It was already too late. Adam was right in front of you. He would catch up instantly. There had already been so much chemistry built between you these past months. Even if you were to blow past him, he would be hurt and you might have to start from square one all over again. You were puzzled by your previous thought. Why would you care about how he felt? You had a valid reason to want to escape. What is wrong with you? 

Adam then stood in your line of sight, "Hey, could you give me a hand?"

"Uh sure." You reluctantly followed him over the box, and he watched you carefully. You try to snap out of your own mind. The two of you sit on the floor. You watch Adam as he's cutting the box open with scissors. You follow his hands with your eyes and try not to think about the door. 

"You're such a good girl," Adam says and you refuse to meet his eyes, looking down. You don't think so. You wanted to leave. You wanted to run straight up those stairs and leave this basement forever. You swallow hard. Adam hands you the scissors, and you felt your hands shake a bit. He just gave you a weapon. It would be so easy to stab him and hightail out of there. In fact, it would more than easy. Adam was deep in concentration preparing the gift for you. You are absorbed in the thoughts of bringing your arm back and sinking the blades into his neck. You heard little footsteps come down the stairs and Moose comes and joins you two. You put the scissors on the concert basement floor. What the fuck is wrong with you? There's no way you were going to stab him, you weren't a killer. If you stabbed him he could die. Or he might survive and then he'd go to jail. Either way, his life was on your hands. If you did go through with it, Moose wouldn't have anyone to take care of him. You didn't want to hurt either of them. But this wasn't about Moose, was it? You didn't want to ruin things with Adam. Killing him wouldn't solve anything. Fine, you thought, if you escaped, you wouldn't tell anyone. He hasn't hurt you or anything. If you were to escape you would just say you ran away. It's what they all thought up there anyway. No one waited for your return. Just your parents. Thinking about it harder you came up with another outcome if you left and didn't tell anyone Adam could probably leave town and you'd never see him again. You didn't want that. You would leave later. You just couldn't leave now. Refocusing on reality, you looked to the man in front of you.