random oneshots

Isn't Kokichi a Tsundere in the Canon Already?

A/N I mean, he's like 'hey shuichi guess what I like you' and Shuichi is like 'what?' and Kokichi is just like 'HA jkjk I'm not gay god you're an idiot'. So this is just going to be Kokichi thinking way too f*cking hard to get Shuichi to confess first. Also, this one may have some of my worst writing ever, and nothing is serious this time already. It's not really a crack fic, it's just that it's not as coherent as my other oneshots. There's still a story though.

(Also, Tenko and Kokichi is my favorite BroTP.)

Kokichi slammed his head onto the table, a low groan coming from him. Tenko sipped at her water, waiting for Kokichi to stop so she could actually say something. Kokichi lifted his head, finally going silent. Tenko sighed. "So. Degenerate problems?"

Kokichi groaned. "Shuichi's such an idiot!" He declared. "I literally, walked straight up to his face, and said 'I love you'." Kokichi was shaking a little from anger. 'And you wanna take a guess as to what he said?"

Tenko grinned slightly. "What~?"

"He said, 'that's cool'." Kokichi hit the table, Tenko grabbing her drink so it wouldn't spill. "Are you FUCKING serious?! That's it?! I literally confessed, and you didn't realize?" Kokichi leaned back, as if he was going to slam his head back down on the table, when Tenko stretched her hand out and placed it on his chest.

"Bro, stop. You're going to get more brain damage than Shuichi already has." She told him. Kokichi sat down, pouting slightly. Tenko thought for a moment, before an idea hit her. "Wait! I've got it! Let's get your boyfriend to confess first!"

Kokichi blinked. "How so? He's as shy as a god damn octopus."

"How does that correlate?"

"Y'know what, it doesn't." Kokichi responded. "I'm the one with octopus hair, I just know that people don't see octopi often." He waved his hand dismissively. "Anyways! My point is is that there's like, no conceivable way we could get him to confess."

Tenko grinned. "Well, let me just tell you have I have a fantastic idea."

Kokichi looked at her with a blank expression. "Don't tell me this plan is like that one other plan you had which involved me getting hit with a car."

"No...." Tenko looked away, avoiding eye contact. "It involves me instead."

Kokichi's eyes widened. "Please tell me we're doing a jealousy plan, and not what I'm thinking you're thinking of." Tenko raised her eyebrows, a smug smile on her face. Kokichi put a hand to his forehead. "Okay then. I'll be right back. I need to grab some pain killers before we do this."

Tenko smiled. "Okay then! See you soon, Kokichi!"

Kokichi turned away, and started running, slightly fearing for his life. What the HELL DOES TENKO WANT TO DO. His mind was running through almost every single idea, his imagination running wild. He contemplated calling Rantaro to bail him out, but he decided not to. The last time, Rantaro has been like 'I'm sorry but Tenko'd probably kill me. You're like, the only guy who's capable of hanging out with her and not dying'. And, that's fair. The main reason Kokichi and Tenko were friends was because they both had someone they wanted to date, but of course, their love interests was too dense to see their completely obvious hints. Because of this, the two of them somehow became friends. And, well, now they're here. Both of them had made elaborate plans for the other to try and help them get their love interests attention.

Some of them had kinda worked, but not that great. Tenko's plans tended to end with Kokichi falling down a staircase, getting clocked in the head with a floorboard, and this one would most likely end up with him in pain. Kokichi sighed. Why does Tenko have to be this way? This friendship is so weird.