Faded Heart

XXIX. Down At The Pawn Shop

The midday heat was beginning to set over the empty Chateau. JJ and I laid silently, each of us lost in our own train of thought following our devious actions in bed for the last hour and a half.

My head rested on his bare chest as I listened to the sound of his steady heart beat. The boy's fingers run through my hair, calming me down with each gentle movement. Occasionally, he would glance down at me, a soft smile crossing his face. One simple look caused my heart to flutter uncontrollably.

"What are you thinking about?" I ask, when I notice his blue eyes begin to drift away. I knew the events from this morning had left him on edge. Although his emotions were momentarily filled, I knew that I couldn't distract him from his thoughts forever.

"Nothing." He replied softly, but his voice broke momentarily. Just enough to alert me of the lie leaving his lips.

I run my fingers gently over the fading cut on his lips, "Something. You're usually never this quiet unless something's up."

"Are you okay?" He shifts, his eyes meeting mine one again. The blue specs filled with concern. "You don't seem the least bit dazed by what happened this morning? Ever since we got back to the house, you've acted like nothing happened."

"Everything is fine." I mumble, trying to focus on his heart beat instead of my thoughts. It was best that I'd just forget about it all. Better to bury it deep than feel any more pain.

But he didn't give up, "You're not the least bit fazed by this? The way you were screaming, fuck, I thought you were going to die."

I didn't need my emotions projecting to his, but I could tell he was slowly letting my pain mix with his own. He never meant it, but his concern was making up for my lack of emotion towards the situation.

There were bigger things to worry about right now. Eventually, we'd all have time to process our own emotional trauma. Now was not the time. I could worry about my friend, but I could never bring myself to let them worry about me.

"Lets hope Peterkin will arrest him and this will be over with." I say, trying to give him something to change the subject.

"How'd she know something was up?" He asks.

"She knows how my family is involved with the gold. I didn't tell her about what happened earlier, but I think she knew something was up. She could tell you were on edge, but not the usual amount. The kind that says something is up."

"That woman's a goddamn mind reader." He chuckles at the thought of Peterkin's perceptiveness of him. " How'd she get stuck being sheriff on this damn island? She's good enough to go work for the FBI."

"She is doing some FBI level investigation work with the Merchant gold." I agree, however, Peterkin was missing some things. She was too focused on her own negative opinions on JJ that she couldn't understand our relationship. Peterkin may be able to see the worst in people, but she blatantly misses that fact that not all criminals are horrible people. "Peterkin didn't miss the chance to give her own thoughts about our relationship though. She may have suggested that you are using me because you owe the Thronton's 30k."

The blonde is quick to defend himself. His voice growing hoarse in the process, "Em, you know I wouldn't have asked you for money. I'm gonna pay that back on my own. I swear, I will pay every single cent back myself."

"I know." I reply, entangling my fingers with his. "As soon as you pay off your restitution and I get my trust fund, we're getting as far away from here as possible."

"Emerson, I promise you no more of this bullshit." He says, his eyes growing big as he listens closely to his own words. I couldn't tell if he was trying to convince me or convince himself of what he was saying. "Next place we settle, the cops won't know me by name. I will not have the Maybank reputation follow me around any longer."