𝐒𝐄𝐗 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐌𝐘 𝐄𝐗, ˢᵃʳᵃʰ ᶜᵃᵐᵉʳᵒⁿ

i. don't kiss and tell

EMMA ROUTLEDGE HAD done everything in her power to help find her father. She wasn't at all convinced that he was dead, not after what Big John had told her and her little brother the day before he disappeared. It had been nine months, everyone kept telling her that it was okay to move on, that she should be grieving, but who was to mourn if there wasn't proof of death?

The brunette sat in the middle of her father's office, her eyes closed, fingers pinching the brigde of her nose in deep thought. It felt like she had gone through everything in this room a few dozen times and there was nothing helping her figure out where the hell her dad was. Emma obviously hadn't heard the front door open since she nearly jumped out of her skin when a light knock sounded on the other side of the office door. "Em? You in there?"

A sigh of relief left the girl's lips as she stood and walked out to see JJ with a smile on his face. "You scared the shit out of me, J."

"Well maybe if you weren't so invested in your little history project you would've heard us come in."

Emma rolled her eyes, walking away from the boy and into the living room where she found the rest of her friends. She snatched a bottle of cold beer from her brother's hand with a laugh then plopped down between him and Kie on the couch. "What the hell, Em?" He rolled his eyes then, lightly shoving her closer to Kie.

"Get over it JB, there's plenty in the fridge." John B groaned, pushing himself to his feet and trudging into the kitchen. "So, what'd I miss today?" She questioned, propping her feet up on the coffee table.

Pope smiled widely at the girl. "Trespassing, almost got caught. You should've been there, E." Pope had always had a small crush on Emma, he was planning on telling her soon, he hoped the beer in his hand would give him the confidence boost he needed.

"Sounds great, P. I'll be sure to tag along next time."

JJ strolled into the room with a bottle of whiskey in his hand. "Who says my old man's good for nothin' huh?" Emma patted the spot next her with a grin.

JJ sat down, slinging an arm around her before setting the expensive looking bottle of alcohol in the girl's lap. She cracked it and took a swig then handed it to Kie who passed it to JJ. "He sure does know how to pick a good bottle." The girl said, Emma nodded in agreement.

After some drinking and smoking a blunt JJ rolled, Emma was in her room, Mac Demarco streaming from the record player on her desk.  She was at peace, fucked up in her own space. The weight of the world lifted from her shoulders for the time being. Then her door opened and John B stumbled in with tears in his eyes. Emma sat up, immediately worried. "Hey, Bub." She opened her arms and let her brother cry on her shoulder. "What's going on? I thought you were having a good time out there?"

"I miss him, Em." John B sniffled, pulling away to see the soft, sad smile on Emma's lips.

"I know JB, I miss him too. I spend hours on end holed up in his office trying to figure out where the hell he went. It's been nine months, he should've reached out by now-"

"Emma I know that." He said, standing up and wiping his cheeks. "Haven't you ever thought you're just making it worse? Everyday that you're in there is a constant reminder that he isn't!"

"Oh I'm so fucking sorry that I want to find our father John B! At least I'm trying, you just sit around partying with your friends just hoping that one day he'll be in that office again!" Emma felt her hands shake in anger. "Who knows? Maybe it's time to face the music.. Maybe he's just gone."

"Don't say that!" John B shouted as Emma tried to move past him and out of her room. "He's not dead, Emma! You know that!" He grabbed her arm to stop her. "How could you?"

"Let go of me!" She yanked her arm from his grip. "You're drunk. Take your ass to bed."

Emma didn't look at any of the Pouges as she stormed outside, anger boiling her blood as she sat at the end of the dock. She held her head in her hands as she started to cry. "I'm trying. Dad-" She choked on a sob, things weren't supposed to be this hard, she was only sixteen, how could she let it get this bad. "I can't do this without you."

"E?" Pope's calm voice called to the girl. She didn't look up, only continued looking out at the water, silent tears rolling down her face. "We heard you and JB-"

"I don't- I don't care. Okay, Pope? I don't."

He sat next to her, wrapping his arms around her. "It's okay."

"No it's not. It's not okay. John B, he wants nothing more than for our dad to come home, I- I'm doing so fucking much. I'm trying so hard to do the right thing, keep on the right path-"

"So let us help you Em. We're your friends, we're here for a reason." Pope tucked a finger under her chin lifting her face so she would look at him. "Let me help you." He cupped her cheek, running his thumb back and fourth lightly then he kissed her.

Emma was the first to pull away, keeping her hand planted on Pope's chest. "P, I didn't know you-"

"I like you." He tried to move in again but Emma softly pushed him away.

"Pope, I'm-" A quiet laugh escaped her lips. "I uh, well. I like girls."

"What? But you flirt with JJ all the time."

"No I don't. JJ is my best friend, P. That's all. So if I'm gonna be hooking up with anyone in the group it's gonna be Kie."

He stood up. "Don't tell anyone I kissed you." With that he walked away, leaving Emma to think about everything that just happened.