EXO IMAGINES

-28- Self Harm

Member: Chen
done by admin phoeb
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Going to school with people calling you names is not a new thing to you. You are an ordinary girl, not too fat and not too skinny, just average, but because of your oversized uniform and your chubby cheeks, people started bullying you emotionally and words / sentences that you heard everyday are

'fatty'

'fat ass'

'omg why is she so fat?'

'she should lose some weight'

'she ate too much' and more. The worst part is that even your best friend make fun of your size which make you lose your confidence. Everytime when she has nothing to do, she will just talk about your size, without noticing that those things she said were offensive and was actually hurting your feelings.

None of them notice that you're hurt, emotionally, mentally and physically since you always act like you didn't hear them. What makes you disappointed is that your best friend didn't even notice how hurt you are even though she's with you almost all the time. You walked toward your locker and take out your books when someone jumped on you from behind, it's Na Eun, your best friend. "Haha saw your big butt and know you're here." there she goes again, saying offensive words without thinking of your feelings. You just smiled at her, hiding a hurt feeling behind that smile you were forced to show.

-fast forward to after school-

You tossed your bag on the floor as soon as you reached your room. You sat at your bedside table, curling yourself up in a ball. You flashed back at all the hurtful comments other made at you, uncontrollably weeping. You reached out and took out a blade which you hid underneath your pile of textbooks. You pull up your sleeve, slowly allowing the blade to cut onto your wrist, blood started to flow, but all you could do was to cry.

**they never know about the reason of me buying oversized uniform**

**they never know how their words hurt my feelings**

**they never know about the scars behind this sleeve**

**they never**

**never**

**never**

each slide represented each words / sentence that you've thought. More blood oozed out of your wounds but surprisingly it felt good...to you. You watched as the blood flowed, feeling satisfied, you went to the washroom and washed the blood away at the basin. To be honest, that's not the first time you had cut yourself with the blade. You started it months ago, due to tons of stress that you faced. And the reason behind this oversized uniform is that the sleeves will be longer and it will be able to cover up the wounds on your wrist. you splashed your face with water, uncontrollably crying. No one knew you were facing depression by yourself.

- Next Day -

'look, the fat one is here' you heard someone gossiping as you walked pass them. ** again ** you thought as you clutched onto the side of your skirt tightly. It's like a daily routine to you, going to school, hearing harsh words and go home. It's been very normal to you that you face this kind of stuff everyday, but you still have no ides why you can't just let them be and took their words as air. you tried, tried very hard to ignore them but none of the times worked. As you finally walked a torture lots of distance to your classroom, you entered, proceeding to your seat. Your seat was at the very back of the class, near a window, you're glad that your appointed to sit there, it's peacefulness, you could say, as no one sat beside you to provide you with extra "insult service". Waiting for the teacher to come, which took like a total decade, the teacher finally came. The first thing she said when she stepped into the class was something you bound not to hear at this period of time. "Ok class, you're gonna have injection and body checkup for today which I've mentioned it days ago" **shit! I've forgotten it! How am I gonna hide my wrist when they are gonna inject me?!?! I shouldn't have cut myself yesterday!** you panicked, mentally crying, facepalming at yourself. Now you're screwed, thanks to the unwanted "free topping" the nurses and teachers gave.

You lined up outside the room, waiting for your turn to inject. Each step you take make you even more nervous than before. It represents you getting nearer to the one injected. **what will they think of me???** you were anxious in your thoughts, hoping that there will be some good news leading to no injections for you. Sadly, there's none.

-fast forward-

You sat on the chair infront of the nurse and looked at her taking out the needle filled with unknowned substances. Clutching onto the ham of your skirt tightly, you began to have cold sweat. "Miss, please give me your arm." she said, slowly lifting the needle up to your arm level. You slowly place your right arm on her palm. As soon as she pulled up your sleeve, you had the urge to quickly cover your wrist with you left hand. She gasped in horror, widening her eyes, not knowing how to react. You could hear the guy beside you gasped too. You had the feeling you need to push this matter back, trying to be as calm as possible, you requested, "can you just inject me as fast as you can?" The nurse recovered from utter shock, not knowing to inject you quickly and set you free, or bring this matter up serious. Looking at you anxious expression, she hesitated if her next step was appropriate. She quickly pushed the needle into your arm and pulled it out as soon as possible.

You ran away from the room just as the nurse was about to ask you about your wounds. Running out to the garden, you turned to your hiding place and hide inside. You sat down at the corner and hug your knees while crying your heart out. You knew you were facing depression. You were hiding this all round and people noticed it. How would they think of you? All the bad, horrible memories pushed their way through into your mind. You forced them out, but more just kept coming. Moments later, the tears soon turned into soft sobs. Pushing away all the emotions, you decided to clear all at once. You stopped crying and took out your blade from your skirt's pocket and slide it across your wrist, continuously, deeper than usual, with your poker face, focusing. You heard footsteps out of the blue, and it's coming near you. ** why would people come here? I didn't even tell Na Eun about my hiding place...** you were too absorbed, you won't take a step until those thoughts went away. You thought that the person will go another way, since no one knew you here, so you continued cutting your wrist, you were at the edge losing your mind, thinking that it's the best if your whole wrist drop off. Surprisingly the footsteps became faster and it stop infront of you. Before you could even react, the person slap your blade away and pull you into a hug, bringing you in, shocked.

"JEBAL! STOP HURTING YOURSELF!" The voice of the hugging male pierced through your ears. " LET GO OFF ME!! NOBODY EVER CARES! MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS! " you yelled, struggling and punching for him to let go, the blood from your wrist smudge onto his white, clean shirt. "(Y/N)..." his voice about to crack. He pulled away, still holding onto your dear arms tightly. Your eyes widened upon seeing his face. Utterly familiar. "C-Chen?" you stuttered. Chen is the kingka from your school and he's the only person that haven't bully you, YET. "(Y/N)..." he said again, gently carressing your shoulder. "I care... jinjja..." he trailed off while looking at you with he eyes that sparkled with about-to-fall tears. "Y-you're lying." you said, firm but almost crying. His grip on your arms tightened. "I really do care...please...let me take care of you..." he said, his voice softer than before. "W-why? why would you c-" you pushed your words out while trembling, but was cut off by him. "because I like you (Y/N)....I like you.... I'm always following you here and there. I'm the one who sat beside you just now... I followed you here everytime. So please... stop hurting yourself and let me take care of you... I don't care about your scars. I don't care about your appearance. I just want you to give me a chance... the chance to love you and take care of you..." The tears that you're holding in finally fell. You hug Chen tightly, lying your head on his chest. He slowly wrapped his arms around you, nuzzled into the crook of your neck. "So...can you give me the chance?" || END ||