KamuKoma Oneshots (Complete)

I am not Izuru Kamukura (angst)

HEAVY TRIGGER WARNING:
S//cide mention

This is gonna an angst thing, I have no idea why I came up with this because I was crying while I was writing.

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Nagito's POV:
I looked out at the vast landscape of the tragedy. It was all destroyed, and I helped. Izuru was resting on the ground next to me, also looking at the destruction he caused.

"To think we could do such a thing, such despair..." I sighed. The only reason I agreed to do such a thing was to get closer to Izuru, such a selfish decision on my behalf. Izuru never responded.

I looked down at Izuru, who was holding his head in his hands and trembling. This was a normal occurrence, as he gets overwhelmed quite easily. I immediately sat down on the ground and held him close. "What's going on this time?" I asked in a caring tone, gently patting his head. I did what I usually did to help those sick kids calm down from their panic attacks, and it usually worked, but this time he looked at me directly in the eyes with a scared expression.

"What have I done. I hated Junko so much, and yet I decided to lead this tragedy. It's sickening, I can't live with all of this shit on my shoulders." Tears started rolling down his face. He's been considering ending his life since Junko died, but I'm the only one keeping him alive. "It's never too late to change. We can't do anything except keep it going, it's our only purpose right now. If you don't want to keep going, then that's alright, but I won't let you die." His eyebrows furrowed and he looked away. I stayed close to him, but I don't think he appreciated it.

I promised to stay by his side ever since he started considering suicide. The other remnants didn't care, in fact, they encouraged it. They wanted to feel the despair of losing their second leader, but I loved him too much to let him do that. "Izuru?" I tapped on his shoulder. He looked at me and I smiled. His expression softened as I smiled at him, but he still looked sad, despite lacking the ability to show his emotions.

"Izuru, I love you so much..."

Right as I said that, Izuru rested his head on my shoulder. The soft breeze surrounding us blew some of his hair into my face, but I didn't mind.

"Thank you..." He answered simply. I assumed he was lost in thought. I wondered what he was thinking about, he isn't easy to read. I started spacing out, thinking of Izuru, of course

"Nagito?" I immediately snapped back into reality. I didn't even know he knew my name, he always called me "Servant" which was a dumb nickname the kids gave me. "Yeah?"

"I love you too," Izuru said quietly.

He finally calmed down. I wiped the remaining tears from his face. "I'm not sure what I would do without you..." He said looking up at the sky, which was colored with shades of orange and red. It wasn't sunset, it always looked like that now. I forgot what the blue sky looked like, I missed it. It probably looked so beautiful. With the fluffy white clouds covering the blue of the sky, I missed looking up at that beauty. But I have Izuru, and he's enough beauty for me. I knew Izuru felt the same way.

"Let's get up, nothing is gonna get done if we sit here forever," I said, struggling to get up with the wounds Syo gave me a while back. When I finally got up, I helped up Izuru, even though he was just fine. We started walking towards Towa Hills, as it was the only place I knew was fine. The kids have vanished, so I knew it was safe to go in.

While we were walking, Izuru stopped and stared at the ground for a moment. He proceeded to say something I didn't expect.

"I can't feel anything."

The soft breeze turned into full-on wind. The wind made Izuru's hair flow around him, it didn't even look real. I stopped admiring Izuru's beauty and ran over to comfort him before he collapsed. I held him in my arms and waited for him to say something.

I heard him mumble something, I could only make out the words "Izuru Kamukura." He started mumbling again, this time I could only hear "Hajime Hinata."

"Izuru, who is Hajime?"

He pushed me away and fell to the ground. It looked like he remembered something he wished he didn't remember.

"I am not Izuru Kamukura, I am Hajime Hinata" He mumbled under his breath, repeating it over and over again.

I gripped his shoulders and yelled, "IZURU!"

He shut up and looked at me, terrified.

"What did they do to me, Hopes Peak Academy."

It's been years since I heard that name. I tried not to shiver at the name, as I admired it so much.

"I can't feel anything." He said again

I cupped his cheek with my hand and brought my face close.

"How do you feel when I touch you?" I asked calmly.

He hesitated. It seemed like he was brought back into reality.

"Safe"

--

this is all over the place holy shit-

this doesn't really make sense but here we go, some  a n g s t

it's kinda short but whatever, I just wanted a quick thing to publish while I try to come up with more fluff shit

if you want more angst just let me know, even though I am kinda bad at writing it

heh