52. I Hate You, You Suck, Never Again

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You need to remember that while you're in labour, you can control what happens and you can even enjoy it. Those were the words that they had told us at my birthing class, and the ones that I was trying to remember as that first contraction pulsed my body.

"Just breathe, okay Ash. Take deep breathes. Spencer's calling your mum and Isabelle now, and Alex has run to get Ben," Kate whispers, and Miss Fabray ushers everybody out of the classroom. I feel the second contraction coming through, and I grit my teeth, and scream through the pain, which feels like shaking in every bone in my body, praying that this baby won't take forever to come out. The classroom door bangs open, and Spencer comes back in, followed by Mrs Jones, Mr Jones' wife who is a midwife, who, lucky for me, happened to be on school grounds today. She rushes to my side, and whispers a couple of words to Kate, and then she runs out of the room. Spencer paces the floor nervously, and keeps checking his phone. I feel another contraction seize my body, and I scream, not bothering to grit my teeth.

"I hate him. Never. Going. To. Have. Sex. Again" I scream. Spencer snaps out of his trance and comes to take my hand. I squeeze at tight as I can go, and Miss Jones whispers something else to Spencer.

"Honey, you have to get up and walk around to the couch." She says.

"Are you kidding me. Walk?" I scream through my pain.

"Well, this young man can pick you up if he can." She glances at Spencer, and I give him a pleading look, as the tears stream down my side, and I squeeze again. He picks me up, careful of my bump, and lays me down on my side, on the squashy couch at the front of the classroom. I give him a thankful look.

"It hurts so bad. Make it stop. Please. I'll do anything. Please, make it stop." I cry through my screams, pushing my sweaty hair out of the way. Kate runs back into the room, with a dressing gown, a pillow and a hair tie.

"You have to stand up, and we are going to get you into the dressing gown. The ambulance is stuck in traffic. You might deliver here."

I pant, and close my eyes, and get to my feet. Spencer walks out of the room, and Kate helps me change into the dressing gown. I collapse on the side again, and feel my bones shake again. Mrs Jones checks my dilation and nods.

"You're at 6 centimetres. You can't start to pushing yet honey. Keep going through those contractions."

"I don't want to. I hate him. Hate him." I scream, yelling at nobody in particular. The door swings open again, and I scream through my pain.

"YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, I HATE YOU, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK!", I scream at Ben, feeling the pain.

"Babe, you're doing great, just keep going." He pants sliding down next to me and taking my hand.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP." I howl. The contraction stops, and I pant, catching air.

"Nine centimetres, nearly there Ash," Mrs Jones says.

"It hurts. Please, just make it stop. I'll do anything. Please, make it stop," I whimper through my pain, looking at Ben.

"Please. I'm begging you." I whisper.

"10 centimetres, next contraction you have to push."

Kate wipes my face down, and then her, Alex and Miss Fabray leave the room, with Miss shutting the door behind them. I feel the contraction come and I scream as I push like my life depends on it, holding my breath and screaming.

"YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK!" I scream.

"NEVER HAVING SEX EVER AGAIN!" I yell as the pain stops and I catch my breath.

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"Ash, I can see the head, give this next one a big push, you're nearly there!", Mrs Jones yells, over my screams.

"You can do it Ash," Ben yells.

"I can do it. I can do it," I scream, trying to make myself muster the energy to push further. Isabelle wipes the sweat off my face, and as I yell again, she pulls my loose hair of my sweat covered face.

"HOW THE FUCK DID YOU DO THIS TWICE?" I scream as the energy from me pushes out, and hear an ambulance siren approaching. Isabelle runs from the room.

"You can do it babe. I believe in you." Ben says, squeezing my hand.

"No. I can't," I cry through my pain, hoping that God will see this as a sign that i'm done, but another comes, just as painful. I squeeze and push, feeling the pain come, and not leave.

"Few more pushes and you'll have your baby," Mrs Jones calls from down the end of the couch. Isabelle returns with the stretcher and two ambulance crew members. I scream as Ben lifts me up like a baby and lays me down on the stretcher. They roll the door, and wheel me out pass the gawking faces of the students pressing their faces up against the classroom windows trying to have a look. They roll me into the ambulance, and zoom away through the traffic.

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"One more push, and she'll be here." The new midwife yells, and Ben squeezes me hand.

"Come on babe. One more push and we'll get to meet our baby." The contraction hurts the most out of the last 3 hours. I yell and scream. And then it stops. And a little baby's cries fill the room.

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