Melissa

Chapter 48 - At Peace.

Melissa's POV

Eversince I was brought back home, I mean Rogan's penthouse, everything was calm and steady. This place felt safe but something always felt unsettling. There were new maids and bodyguards. My brother and friends visited frequently.

The doctor said I need to get on a healthy diet, I had lost weight. I met my psychiatrist every second day. Rogan was always by my side. I had nothing to complain about.

Rogan gave me everything that a woman could ever ask for, but nothing made me happy. I looked out of the window from my room, there was the clear sky with no birds, just the sun blazing nakedly and the clouds covering it from time to time.

"Melissa, may I come in?"

I turned around to see Dr. Matthews. The psychiatrist. It was good whatever he did, he made me want to talk to him. After Rogan, he is one person I like to talk to.

"Please come, take a seat." I said.

"You look radiant." He smiled. Matthews took his seat on the settee and took out his notepad from the bag.

"Shall we begin?" He asked again and I nodded. "How was your day yesterday?"

"The usual, ate and slept. Friends called in to check. Rogan doesn't leave my side except when he get a call from work. Nothing interesting, doc." I replied. Smiling slightly.

"Your friends are calling in to check with you, why don't you go out to meet them? It's been 2 months you are in here. Don't you want to go out?"

I thought about what to answer. Whatever I say will go back on that report and then reported to Rogan.

"They come here to meet me." I said. "Its not like I don't want to go out, I just don't want to meet my friends or family."

"Why is that so?" He looked at me intently, as if he is close to solving a mystery.

"They know too much about me. Things I wouldn't want them to know." I paused, he looked at me as if telling me to continue. "These people have always judged me for the life that was chosen for me, they thought I chose it myself. Now they only show sympathy. I have only got judgements before instead of care from my friends and family."

"I see..." He said. "Did you try to reach out to them when you were facing those problems?"

I gave a brief thought to that question and I realized that I was being selfish here. "No." I replied honestly. "I always thought they would judge me so I never reached out and they did..." I paused again. "... Judge me."

"I think Melissa, you are angry at everyone. You expected more from them and they couldn't stand up to it, is that it?"

"I'm selfish, aren't I? They have a life, why would they worry about me who had the perfect life of luxuries." My eyes were pooling with tears. "Be honest, doc."

"No, Mel." He took a breath. "this is what I'm here for, to make you face your feelings. Coming out of this will only be possible if you face the issue head-on." Matthews advised. "Have you thought about going back to work?"

He changed the topic, I guess it was getting too heavy. "I don't want to go back. And before you ask why, I'll tell you." I took a look at him. "My job is to help people come out of these type of issues that I was facing each day. It kept me sane that time, I thought if I could help them then I was helping myself indirectly. But now, I'm not more than a laughing stock or some good people with look at me with sympathy. I'm not sure if I can handle either of that."

"That's pretty descriptive and.... Understandable, actually." He said, scrunching his eyebrows in deep thoughts, I knew what was coming next. " How are you feeling about Rogan these days. I have been told that you have lost appetite and getting more and more unresponsive to human contact. Rogan is the only one you talk to on your own."