Reputation

17,520,000 Hours

Spinel

I made my way to the warp pad, feeling like a shell of who I was only days ago.

If only there was another way. But communication is down, the poison is already prepped to come down. All that we need is the Diamonds to stop it. But only they know how to. They are the only ones that could put a stop to all of this.

Would this even have been an issue if I ever left?

If I was here, if I didn't cause the Diamonds to have entrusted Aquamarine to find me. It was the access to all those old ships that allowed her to get this poison. It was my fault that made all of this happen. I am the reason why Earth is slowly being poisoned...again. I am the reason why Homeworld is now facing such a catastrophic future. I am the reason why I have to go back to the garden.

It is my fault that Steven is hurt.

All this guilt doesn't just hurt me. It powers my determination. I made all of these mistakes, all because I tried to run away from my fears that I have to face now. I won't ever be able to run away. I will have to face them eventually. It is inevitable.

I don't know if that makes me feel better or just fuels the machine that is pounding down my only defense. The only defense that is keeping me from finally giving up falling to the floor in tears. It's almost like fate has lined this up. It's destiny that I have to go back.

It's like I can't ever really get out of that garden, cause the way I felt in that garden won't ever get out of me.

I suck a sharp breath in, every muscle tense at the realization. Fueled with determination I take a shaky step forward. If only I could plan what I needed to say, but my mind is running at 100 miles a second. I just need to get it over with.

But before I do a sharp pain goes through my gem, more painful than any of the other times before. I double over, my hand over the crystal heart in hopes that it will stop. But it doesn't. Hot tears roll down my face, unnoticed over the numbness that begins to take over my body. I need to go before I can't go any more.

I hop on the warp pad without a second thought.

It only takes a second to be transported to the truly undesired desired location. I keep my eyes closed, not really knowing how to react to going back. But when I feel that I have made it to my destination it takes me a second of hesitation before opening my eyes.

And when I do, they are there, all looking at me. The pain doubled and this time I can't stop myself from falling forward, collapsing onto the warp pad. I hear the cacophony of shouts from all the diamonds and I can't properly address any of it. All I can do is deliver my message before giving into the darkness.

"Aquamarine is going to set off the injector on Homeworld."