An Unrequited Love {Jonathan Crane x Male Reader}

How

Some weeks pass by, so far I've had a few more conversations with Jonathan. We bonded a bit over books and classical music. He said he scarcely has time to listen to it but when he does he becomes enthralled by it. When he told me this he had this spark in his eye, one I'd never seen on him before. Perhaps he was happy that he could talk with someone about things he enjoyed, without fear of getting hurt or abandoned.

I absorbed every tidbit of information he ever relayed to me. I was finally getting close to him and I wouldn't dream of ruining this by telling him how I truly felt. I was already considered an abomination in the eyes of God, I couldn't bear being seen the same in Jonathan's eyes.

Sometimes he'd talk about Sherry, he'd get this dorky smile on his face and his cheeks would flush a bright red. Every time he brought her up I'd feel my soul die just a little, why couldn't he see how awful she was? I wanted to tell him of all her faults and ugliness but I knew that would just drive him away, so I'd slap on a smile and agree with him about how pretty she was.

While I'd been able to enjoy recent times with getting close to the boy, today had started off just so awful, there was no semblance of joy for me to cling to.

Upon arriving at school, I'd heard murmurs that Bo had come earlier than usual, beelining it straight for Jonathan in particular. I had felt dread fill my entire being, wondering what the heck could be happening to him right now. Before I could decide on whether to search for him or not, the bell rang, my queue to either get to class or get in trouble. I, being so incredibly weak willed, decided to head to class.

I sat in my seat for most of the class, my nerves were shot when Jonathan hadn't shown up. When he finally did near the end of the class I wanted to cry. He had a black eye and a busted lip, an icepack held in one hand as the other handed the teacher a note from the nurse. The teacher gave him a quick 'take it easy' as Jonathan went to his seat, trying and failing to hide a limp.

I heard snickers from the back of the class, where Sherry's cheerleader friends sat. If I had the courage, I would've gone up to them and slapped them all, how dare they laugh at his misery. Jonathan hadn't so much as looked at anyone since entering, instead choosing to scribble down the notes that were on the board before the bell rang.

I tried to speak to him before he left but he just brushed me off, acting as if I didn't exist. It hurt, but I knew he was angry and in pain, and I knew he didn't like being pitied. So I waited until lunchtime, where I could take him to a safe space and he could just let loose.

Time seemed to pass by in slow motion, as it always seemed to do when you wanted it to go by quickly. After what felt like an eternity it was finally lunch time, and just like before he brushed right past me, but I followed him, not quite on his heels but close enough.

Once we were along he abruptly turned and pushed my chest, making me stumble back.

"Stop following me." His voice was somehow calm, but had a hint of anger. His furrowed brows cast shadows over his eyes, which scared me a little bit. I've never seen him like this and I don't like it.

"I j-just wanted to make sure you were alright."

"I don't need your pity! So don't look down on me! I'm not some stray animal that needs to be nursed!" He pushed me again, nearly tripping me over my own feet.

"I don't- I don't pity you, okay? We're friends, right? Friends care for each other."

He stared at me for some time, the furrow in his brow ever so slowly disappearing. A slight frown found its way to his face, he looked down at his feet, clenching and unclenching his fists.

"I guess... you're right, sorry."

"I forgive you."

His eyes found mine when they finally left the floor and I gave him the best smile I could muster. His eyes glossed over but nothing came of it.

I clasped my hands behind my back and rocked on my heels.

"If you're up for it... I know a place Bo and his goons will never find us. We can just sit and read, talk, whatever you want."

He thought about it for a moment, kicking his foot against the floor.

"Sure."

I gesture with my head for him to follow me, taking the lead. I take him outside where the sun beats down on us. Squinting my eyes at the harsh light, I follow the route I've taken since freshman year. Some 30 feet away from the football field but still within the school's perimeter, there's a large shrubbery that has been neglected by custodians for years.

I had initially found it after a month, I was searching for a spot away from the crowd and the smokers outside when I heard a cat. Following the noise led me to this shrubbery, where there was a small clearing, about 5 feet wide, where a cat had wandered in. Since then I'd made the area my little safe haven away from my peers, and luckily no one had ever found it.

Jonathan was apprehensive, being so close to the football field. I gestured to a slim opening in the shrubbery.

"It's a bit of a tight squeeze but you'll be fine. No one knows about this place, I promise."

I went in first, throwing my bag on the ground and flattening the tall grass with my feet. Jonathan followed a bit after, a hum escaping him as he surveyed the area.

"Ta-da~ It's a bit small but I like it."

"It's nice."

As awful as today had started, I felt happy seeing him at peace, even if a little. If I could see the future, I never would've believed that this spot would become our place.