If Only

Chapter 12

"Stop!" I exclaimed as Taehyung tried to get up off the couch for the 100th time.

He groaned, frowning at me, "I'm fine, Y/N! I'm not sick."

I shook my head at him before grabbing the thermometer off the coffee table.

"Open." I commanded and Taehyung reluctantly opened his mouth. I slid it under his tongue and held it there til it beeped. I took it out carefully and checked the number.

"95°." I told him, placing it on the table again, "You aren't sick."

"I told you I wasn't." He mumbled, sitting up and ruffling his hair.

I rolled my eyes at him, "I'll make you dinner before I go."

I walked over to the kitchen and lifted my hair up, putting it into a ponytail. I glanced over at Taehyung who sat there, staring at me. I stuck my tongue out at him and he grinned at me playfully. I turned away from him and began pulling out ingredients. 

"Wanna spend the night again, Y/N?"

I froze in my place, not daring to look back at him. I cleared my throat and hastily pulled out an onion.

"I don't think-"
I started but stopped when I felt Taehyung's hands slide around my waist. I exhaled shakily as I felt his breath hit my ear.

"You don't think what." He whispered, sending chills down my spine.

"I-I don't think that we um- that we should do that again." I replied quietly, cursing myself for stammering so much.

I could practically feel his grin as he slowly pulled me closer, pressing his body against my back. My heartbeat quickened as a blush crept up my face.

"Really?" Taehyung murmured, lightly licking my ear, "You don't sound so sure about that."

I shivered and gasped softly. My hands were shaking as I tried to cut the onion in front of me. I placed the knife back back once I realized I would probably cut my finger off if I even tried. I could feel his heartbeat against my back. Thump... thump... thump. And with every 'thump', my face heated up even more.

"I-" I paused, thinking.

'Do I really not want this?' I asked myself, biting my lip. I knew the answer of course, but I also knew about Jia. And she was the one that at the end of the day, made the decision.

"No Taehyung." I whispered, pushing his hands away and turning to face him, "I'm not going to be a distraction for you."

He looked at me, his eyes narrowing quickly, "What."

I continued, "I refuse to be this- this whore, that just waits for you to be upset so you can have sex with me!" My voice began to rise in volume, "And- and I hate how you think that it's ok to just toy with my feelings because, it's not! And I REFUSE to be treated like a fucking doll that you can just throw away when you're done!" I yelled.

I shoved past Taehyung and grabbed my purse. I hastily put on my shoes as he started walking towards me. He grabbed my arm and tried to pull me back.

"Y/N... That's not it at all." He started, his eyes soft.

"No!" I exclaimed, whipping my arm away from him, "Let go of me." I snarled, walking out the door of his apartment, "I'm never to be that girl, Taehyung. Never."

And with that, I slammed the door on his face and stomped out to the street. I called over a taxi and hopped in it. As I did so, I saw Taehyung run out of his apartment building, looking for me.