Chapter Eight

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Finnwolfhardofficial:Hey, can we talk

I stared at the text for a good ten minutes, frozen in my spot. My thumb hovered over a letter while I bit my nails on my green hand. Talk? What is there to talk about? I don't want to talk. I let put a breath I was holding, replying.

Y/u/n: Uh sure

Finnwolfhardofficial: Can we meet
up?

Y/u/n: I'm busy, just text me

Finnwolfhardofficial: Can I call you?

Shit.

Y/u/n: Yeah

His name popped up, I answered it hesitantly. "Uh...hey." I heard his hoarse voice say.

"What do you need to talk about?" I asked, sitting down on my come chair. "Make it quick, I'm a little busy." I lied, actually I began playing Roblox, keeping my anxiety from rising. It wasn't working.

"I just...I just wanted to see how you're hanging in there..." He sounded like he wasn't sure on what to say. I could imagine him pacing back and forth in his room. "And why you lied."

"Finn, I'm doing well and I don't want to talk about it. I'm sorry but all I can say is that I lied because I like keeping my life private. I gotta go." I hang up, biting my nails. I wasn't able to speak, actually I wanted to bury myself underground until no one could hear my screams.

My hands began to shake violently, resting my hands on my face. "Fuck." I yelled, throwing my sketchbook across the room. I slowly breath in and out, looking at my palm. There were small scars from when I would press my nails so deep blood was drawn. I did that so I wouldn't attack. It hardly ever worked. I should have kept my distance, but I only talked to him because I thought I was going to play with him. But it ran much deeper than that, however I was mistaken. I wasn't prepared. Whilst I turned off my lamp, darkness engulfing me, my phone lit up. Finn's Instagram name popped up, asking me if I'm alright. I didn't respond, instead I walked to my window, opening it. I stuck one foot out the window, gazing at the stars. There were a few shooting stars, but I made no wish. Always be careful what you wish for, and in order for me to be careful, I didn't make any. I'm not ready to face my demons, I'm not ready to face Finn. Yet he pops up everywhere, it's like god is punishing me for my acts, wanting me to have a taste of my own medicine. Are you happy now? I feel dead. My grandmother once told me that if I'm having a bad time, I'll always figure a way out. Everything happens for a reason. Just be patient and star at the stars, wish for something meaningful. Here's the problem though, there's nothing meaningful for me in this world. Even my dreams aren't meaningful, truth be told I have nightmares. No one hears me cry out in my sleep, whenever I wake up, I end up crying myself to back to sleep. Take my pain wherever I go, and people will now not to mess with someone as fucked up as you.

I scrapped my nails against the outside wall, finding myself texting him back.

Y/u/n: I'm good, just have a headache.

He left me on read, and it hurt. I just stared at the black screen, wanting to type more. Instead I held back. I walk back to my bed, lying down.

Just call him, you want too. You want to tell him everything, you need someone to talk too.

I do, yet I don't. I hate opening up, I don't know how. I've never opened up to anyone, never crying, never begging for help. I talk when I want to talk but my demons stay locked up.

"Hey." Finn says through the phone. I never realized I just video called him on IG. His face was appeared, his hair a mess.

"H-Hey." I stuttered.

"Why did you call?"

"I didn't know I was until you answered. I'm dumb. I guess I just want to see how you've been doing. I mean, we haven't seen and talked in a year."

It looked like he was in his kitchen, I heard Nick's voice in the background. "Yeah, we just dropped. School's been really good, including the band."

"You guys are really good. Been listening to the burn CD nonstop, I love The Pixies. I listen to Where Is My Mind nonstop, it's a good song to listen too when I'm out skating."

"Oh shit." He laughs. "I never knew you skated. How long?"

"Since I was ten, I'm self taught. I was at Zumiez and randomly got one. My board is PRod."

"Oh lucky. I've been meaning to get a Paul Rodriguez skateboard. What does yours look like?" I walked over to my closet, finding the skateboard I thought my mom sold. "Right here." I shown him the pink roses, hearing him ooh.

"That is beautiful." He says with awe. I smiled with pride, happy he's talking to me like we're normal friends.

Finn's P.O.V

After video chatting Y/n I hang up, seeing Nick, Cole and Quincy watching me with interest. "What?"

"Who's the lucky girl you were speaking too? You could not make the smile leave even if you tried." Nick teases.

I licked my lips nervously. "I was talking to Y/n."He spits out his drink, coughing like hell.

"Y/N! Isn't she at that mental place?" Cole and Quincy looks at me in shock. "W-When-What?"

"She got out not that long ago. I ran into her at the park and then today at Joe Muggs. It was unexpected but we're just friends...sort of."

"So you guys just randomly become friends after what she did? She stabbed more than person with a pair of scissors and she...she was attacking everyone that came to her."

"She was protecting herself. She was scared."

Nick raised his eyebrow. "Oh now you're defending her? When that happened you told me you didn't want anything to do with that freak, you were a wreck. She broke your heart by lying to you."

"You don't know her like I do."

"Really? She lied to you. She's dangerous."

"No she isn't! She's human just like the rest of us." I yelled. "Nick, she's better. Why is would she be out? And she has not once harmed me when I was with her. "

"Don't you think you're rushing into this too fast?" Cole said, getting between us.

"What do you mean? It's not like I'm asking her to date me."

"I know but don't you think you're rushing into this friendship? You guys haven't seen each other in a year and you just ran into her the other day. You just-"

"Just what? Just ignore her forever? I would but I can't."

Nick shakes his head at me. "You still have feelings for her."

I denied it. "No I don't."

"Yes you do, in fact you had the world's biggest heart eyes when you spoke to her. Finn, she's going to hurt you. Physically and emotionally. Whether you like it or not. I'd suggest you stop seeing her. Even as 'friends', it's not going to end well."

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