I can throw myself away
spend all my time working and learning
but there will still be days like this
ones without the overlap of shifts and classes
days where I'm left with nothing to busy me
it's days like these when my body shuts down
and my mind turns the volume up to ten
my thoughts begin to scream and I am all alone
left to my own self-hatred and doubt that pull the plug and i
feel my small worth and will to live slip away from me
the urge to sob swells in my throat
tears burn my eyelids and I think like three am
and I am the only one I can vent to now
when my chest throbs and splits apart
revealing my heart and soul for the broken things they are
I am all but empty except for the dark recesses inside me
where spider-like thoughts spin their sticky webs on my ribcage
back and forth they weave self-doubt over my heart
and fill my head with self-hatred and uselessness
before slipping into the furthest, darkest reaches of my soul
And, oh, how I wish that I too could slip away.
-11:11 pm
YOU ARE READING
Sweet Nothing
PoetryA small collection of poems written from a dark place in my head.. From the deepest reaches of my soul to the hollow of my heart, on your screen is everything I found the words to express, whether or not it makes any sense at all.
