𝐏𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐨 | Tom Holland

10

Y/N POV:

Not only was he surprised but I had surprised myself with my choice of words. I wasn't sure if I wanted to help him or not, but I did know that he needed it. The only thing I wanted to know was what was wrong with him, but I was afraid he would become furious over how nosey I sound. 

We were both still on the floor as he was taking deep breaths, I knew he couldn't stay down here so I showed my first move that would make him feel like I really did want to help him. 

"Thomas" I whispered hoping he would hear me, "Tommy" I whispered again, this time using his nickname and he looked up instantly with a painful look, "let's get you upstairs" I put my hand on his shoulder.

He nodded very slowly indicating that he did need rest, when we got up I got him a glass of water and he quickly chugged it in a matter of 3 seconds, "you okay?" I whispered again unsure if I even should be asking,  "thank you" he let out squeezing his eyes shut for a second and looked back at my Y/E/C obsored ones, "for what?" I tilted my head slowly to the side sitting at edge of the bed feeling the plush blanket against my palms. 

"For trying" he said putting a hand on the right side of my cheek, I brushed his hand off and that made him realise that I still wasn't comfortable with all of this.

"Tom, even though I'm trying to help, doesn't mean I don't want out" I put my head down and fiddled, "I know, I know I jus- Y/N I just really can't help being without you and if I let you go, you'd never look at me again" he spoke out and I could hear the exhaustion in his voice.

All I did was nod knowing on his perspective he was right, we sat in silence for 2 long minutes before he started talking again. "Can you lay with me?" he softly whispered, "w-what?" my head shot to him, surprised that it's the first thing he spoke out, "lay with me, please" he shut his eyes.

"Thomas, I - I don't know" I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, not knowing if I should look him in the eyes. I finally looked at him after moments of silence and saw that his eyes had a phase of sadness but he quickly turned away before I could really get a chance to see, "it's okay, I'm not going to force you into anything" he whispered out, and for a moment I felt guilty.

But I knew I was doing the right thing because I didn't want to be here in the first place, I had checked to see if he was asleep and his eyes were open just staring off into the distance of the window. 

I figured I would leave him to it and went back downstairs to get myself water and possibly something to fill me up for the day, walking down those stairs made me feel lonely, as much as I'd like to help him, I did miss my parents even though I was never that close to them.

But this taught me that even if I never took them into consideration, they were still doing every possible thing to help me off my feet.

My eyes shifted from the glass of water and I found myself looking at the door ahead of me that was beaming with the sunset, my eyes went wide as I put the cup down and took small steps to the door and all I could see was freedom ahead of me.

With my hand on the door handle, I was quick to react when I felt hands wrap around my waist making me stop my movements, I turned around slowly seeing his eyes mixed with anger and pain, I only looked down not knowing what to do.

He let go and took a step back, "I really trusted you for a moment Y/N" he didn't sound mad, just confused. I didn't know what to do as I fiddled with the hem of my shirt, "please talk to me, what do you want?" he said putting a palm of his hand on the side of his forehead.

Those words really hit my nerve as I clenched my jaw looking up from the floor, "what do I want!?" I said clenching my fist, "WHAT DO I WANT?" I said through my teeth and used all of my power to push him on the floor.

"Y/N/N-" he started, I threw my fist at the side of his face, "WHAT DO I FUCKING WANT THOMAS!?" I shouted out throwing another fist, at this point I didn't know if I wanted to help him or hate him.

He hovered over me as hot tears of anger ran down my face, what was going on with me, I feel like the more hours I'm here, the crazier I'm getting I've never seen my self act this way before and it scared me. Both of my trembling clenched hands were held down on the floor as he looked at me with a bewildered look.

He wanted to speak up but he got up and turned his back, no emotions, no anger, no sadness, nothing. He got up and walked away like nothing happened, "what are you doing?" I started getting up.

———

All he did was ignore me as he took food out of the fridge, "talk to me asshole" I stepped closer and pushed his back he's been ignoring me for the past 20 minutes after my fit and I've been getting angry just looking at him turning the stove on and making things.

"You really are crazy" I whisper-shouted hoping he would hear me. I could see that he was really sensitive and dejected at the situation and that only confused me more because you would except him to go crazy mad.

Knowing I had no hope of him talking back, I gave up and sat on the stool with my head in my hands while he was doing whatever he was doing, "eat up" he chucked out with a painful voice, and before I could say anything he sped walked upstairs, my head fell down to the table on my arms and sobbed at how fucked up this whole situation was, a man who desperately needed me and a girl who desperately wanted it to be over. 

In the darkness of the night, I had thought through the whole situation and tried to fight the feeling of my anger and hurt that were mixed while I ate the meal he had prepared for me.