This Game Called Love

Chapter 9

I couldn't even move my lips to answer his passionate kiss because he's too dominant. I just close my eyes and encircled my arms into his neck to feel the sensation. I have no idea for how long we're doing it, but I can even hear the gasped of my friends as if they're watching a live show. I was trying to catch my breath when our lips parted. After that, everything went awkward. We couldn't even look in each other's eyes. What the hell was that? I know it was only a dare, and I was too drunk, but why do I feel like there's something more about that kiss? I excuse myself for a minute to get another bottle of Jack Daniels. That kiss made me sober, and so I need to drink more to hide the embarrasment I feel. They just continue with the game, but I can really feel the awkwardness between me and Lucas.

How we were able to go back to the house was still a question for me. We were so wasted, and nobody could drive for us. When I woke up, I abruptly hold my head and groaned. It's been a while since the last time I experienced a severe hangover. I feel like I'm dragging myself out of bed. My head is terribly aching and so I asked Nanay Judith to make a soup for lunch.

"Nay, sino po naguwi samin dito kagabi?" I asked still yawning and dizzy.

We didn't have a driver last night, and it was impossible that my friends drove for us. They were also wasted just like us.

"Mabuti na nga lang at tumawag ang kuya mo sayo kagabi. Nag-alala kasi at dis-oras na ng gabi pero wala pa kayo dito sa bahay."

I try to recall if I received a call from my brother last night. Usually naaalala ko naman lahat ng kagagahang ginawa ko. And speaking of, that intimate kiss suddenly flashed back to my memory. Parang nawala agad ang hangover ko!

Shit, how am I going to approach him after what happened? I'm still not in the right mind. I don't have the guts to talk to him. We only acted like that because of that damn alcohol. We were so drunk and we couldn't control our actions. There was nothing special about that kiss. But still, I feel like I must talk to him about it.

Our trip ended, but I forbear from talking to Lucas. He can probably notice that I'm distant to him. And luckily, he never talked to me about it. Gusto ko talagang kalimutan na lang 'yung nangyari pero kapag nakikita ko siya hindi ko maiwasan isipin.

He kissed me back for goodness sake.

Hanggang sa mag-start ulit ang klase, medyo umiiwas talaga ako sa kanya. I try my best to remain casual every time we see each other in school or in the house. Mabuti na nga lang at hindi n'ya ako tinatanong kung anong problema. But there's a part of me that keeps on insisting that I need to talk to him. Gusto ko naman pero pero hindi ko naman alam kung anong sasabihin ko.

Why do I make that kiss such a big deal? Baka nga hindi na rin n'ya naaalala 'yun.

A week has passed, and we're still awkward to each other. O ako lang talaga ang problema? He's been too busy ever since the finals started so I rarely get to see him. Mabuti na rin siguro 'yun. Good thing, my mind is too occupied of all the school works I need to do. At dahil na rin sa sobrang dami kong ginagawa hindi ko na magawang isipin pa 'yung nangyari. But my mind is a traitor! Sometimes I just found myself spacing out every time I recall that moment when his lips met mine. I was not in my right mind when I did that, but somehow I felt a different sensation inside me.

My day-dreaming ended when someone accidentally bumped me.

"Sorry." My things scattered on the floor. I was about to pick up my things when someone helped me.

"Hail?"

Napatingin agad ako dun sa nag-abot sakin ng gamit ko at si Elijah pala 'yun.

"Sorry. Hindi kita napansin." I sincerely apologized. Kasalanan ko naman kasi. Kung saan-saan napapadpad ang utak ko.