Weeping Her Lost Desires (Baby Daddy Series #1)

Simula

Simula

The whiff of grass soothed my poor atmosphere in the cold rainy time of September.

Like any other day, I always remembered what it felt like to be abandoned. I was not only deserted with a clue or trace. I had a purpose to believe that all was real and none of it could be something that I made up.

Sadly, I couldn't cure my heart with ways of forgetting.

"Marami pang kabayo riyan, Crescent," ani Guillermo.

I sighed heavily as I brushed the long, silky, and soft hair of the white horse I preferred for my intended wedding.

My mother did not agree with my selection, and that was a big thing for me. They always liked my decisions.

However, I really couldn't blame them for not liking everything there was to offer when I didn't even think I could handle what I once wanted for me. And now, everything could not be ignored easily. Everybody had to stick with what was brought to us, by me.

"Ito ang gusto ko, Guillermo..." I whispered warmly while my hands were still trailing the horse's back.

I'm engaged. One thing I did not expect, now that we are risking something big.

Magandang lalaki ang pakakasalan ko. Mayaman, gwapo, matalino, mabait, lahat na. Ilang taon lang ang tanda niya sa akin, pero hindi naman naging hadlang sa akin 'yon para hindi siya magustuhan. Kung iisipin, siya pa nga ang huwaran ko sa isang lalaki.

Sino ba naman ang tatanggi sa isang kagaya niya? Kung pag-uusapan ang nakaraan, masasabi kong kahit ako ay hindi nakalaya sa lubos niyang katauhan. Nagustuhan ko rin siya noon. Ngunit ngayong ganito ang nangyari, saka ko lang masasabi na ako 'yon. Ako na ngayon ang may gustong tumanggi sa kaniya.

I think of him as someone who is very chivalrous and brilliant. He was the guy most readers looked up to in fiction. He was idyllic. It only had to be little words from him to make a young woman like me, jump out of joy.

Subalit habang papalapit naman ang naturingang kasal na matagal niyang sinuway. Saka naglaho ang paningin ko sa kaniya. Nagbago ang isip ko na hindi niya naman kasalanan. He had to do what he had to do. I was the one to blame... And I guess, I just had to accept the end of it.

Without a visible lump, I still looked at my stomach like the baby was already kicking.

"He deserves to know, Crescent," seryosong sabi ni Tevaughn.

Si Tevaughn ang numero unong tumututol sa pag-uugnay sa aming dalawa. Dati pa man, siya na ang pinipilit ng mga magulang ko sa akin. I didn't mind in the past. I liked him.

Matagal ko nang alam na hindi sang-ayon si Tevaughn sa aming dalawa. Hindi niya kailanman ginamit ang mga katangian ko, at pagsabihan ako ng masama para malaman kong hindi ako ang gusto niya. Ramdam ko ito kahit hindi niya naman sa akin sinabi ng harap harapan.

I must admit that I didn't really care. He would always dodge the topic about us. About how our parents tied our lives to be together in the end.

I felt a bit guilty especially when I let everybody around me dictate what I wanted with Tevaughn. His free will was pinned whilst I only thought selfishly about myself. Because they knew that I liked him. They didn't care about him.

And, I feel even more guilty. Now that he's stuck with me and doesn't have a say on anything. I couldn't say he wanted us to be together now though...

I smiled bitterly. "I don't need someone like him," sagot ko.

Totoo ang sinabi ko. Hindi ko kailangan ng lalaking duwag. Ayoko ng kagaya niya. At mas lalong ayaw ko sa kaniya.

"If I found out that a girl is pregnant with my child..." Tumigil siya at suminghap. "Nobody's going to stop me from fighting... Kahit ano pa ang sabihin ng magulang niya..."