Hatred // Muke

✎ « fourteen »

for karen bc ily ♥♥♥

AND PLEASE CHECK OUT MY NEW MUKE FANFIC 'RENDEZ-VOUS' IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH ♥

♡

monday morning, a new day in hell -- also known as school -- for michael.

english is probably the worst you can have on a monday morning, because you just woke up and then you immediately need to pay attention when all you really want to do is nothing but sleep.

he got up at quarter to seven and had choosen his clothes for the day in hell; his black leather jacket combined with his metallica t-shirt, black skinny jeans and black converse. a perfect match with his striking red hair.

he took a shower, pulled on his clothes, brushed his hair and went downstairs where his mum --to his surprise-- sat on a chair next to the kitchen table.

'hi mom what are you doing here?', he asked her curiously. 'I only need to work this afternoon today', she smiled. 'that's great mum', michael said.

'I made pancakes by the way, they still lie on the pan', she said and continued to read her magazine. 'thanks mom!', michael said happily. she almost never makes pancakes, because she never has the time to make them in the morning.

maybe this day wasn't as terrible as michael had thought at first.

but boy was he wrong . . .

;;

'hey michael!', calum yelled in the school hall. michael had made it to school at five to eight, just in time to grab his books from his locker and to meet up with cal and ash.

'hi cal, how are you?', he asked him. 'I'm not fine, it's english in', he looked at the clock on his phone, 'exactly one minute.'

'hey guys! where's luke?', ashton asked when he had joined their group. 'I don't know, he's probably again with his barbie doll', calum rolled his eyes.

at exactly that moment luke and meghan walked next to them, probably on their way to their next classes. luke had english with the three other boys, but fortunately meghan only had two classes together with them.

the bell rang and everybody hurried towards their class, including luke and meghan who were full on snogging next to luke's locker. delicious.

they entered the classroom where miss smith was already sitting on her chair in the front of the class.

more people began to enter the class and at the end only luke was missing.

'does somebody know where mister hemmings is?', she asked. 'yeah, he's standing outside the class with meghan', some guy said behind ashton, calum and michael.

at exactly that moment luke entered the classroom with his blonde black hair not in it's normal style. he took the only seat that wasn't occupied, the one next to michael.

'hey freak', he hissed. michael just looked down and didn't said a thing. 'you said that all of the dye would be out of my hair today. and meghan told me that it looked ugly as hell, so maybe you could give me a little explanation why it's still in there?', he pointed to a strand of hair.

'I don't know', michael said, almost silent. 'you do know that this was going to happen, and you know what? it's fucking ugly', luke hissed. michael shrugged and tried to concentrate again.

'look at me you freak', luke hissed. 'it's not because you're ugly as fuck that you need to look down and have a reason to look away from me', luke whisper yelled.

'you're so disgusting, I bet your mum had a postnatal depression when she first saw your face. probably also the reason why your dad left you; he couldn't look at your ugly ass face anymore', luke said.

'stop please', michael pleaded and tried not to look at luke.

'why should I?', luke shrugged. 'you're dumb as hell, you annoy me and everybody. even calum and ashton told me that they thought you were annoying, they just didn't have the guts to tell you', luke whispered.

michael felt like all the air was smacked out of him and suddenly he felt a single tear roll down his cheek. even ashton and calum said that he was annoying? but weren't they his friends?

he felt that feeling again, the urge. everything was just too much and his life was fucked up, so what was the reason to exist anymore?

'can I please use the bathroom?', michael asked his teacher. 'I'm not feeling really well.' he grabbed his backpack and slammed the door behind him. the tears were coming and he ran to the closest bathroom.

he sat in a stall, locked up and searching like a maniac for that special thing that could make everything better, but to be honest, it doesn't help a thing.

•! trigger warning !•

michael took the little razor in his hand and hesitated for a moment. was it worth it, should he do it?

do it, you're worthless.

he cried even harder and his vision became slightly blurried so he used his sleeves of his sweater to dry his tears.

'you're nothing more than a disgusting fag'

he couldn't help it, so he just cut.

'you're ugly'

and then a second cut.

'nobody will love you. even calum and ashton hate you'

and the third.

it went on like that until he couldn't handle the pain anymore, he had cut himself without knowing it more than thirty times. the stinging felt painful but at the same time it was pleasurable; having that feeling for a few seconds made michael happy, even if he had to make himself feel pain to have it.

he took a few tissues from his pocket and tried to make the blood go away, but it just kept coming and coming. he had cut way too much, again.

he leaved the stall and used some water to fresh up his cuts, enjoying the feeling of the stinging and the blood on his wrist.

'are you okay?', a voice suddenly asked. michael dropped his tissues and was scared to look to his right were the guy stood.

'my god! what have you done!', the boy gaped and took one of michael's hands in his.

michael just started to cry again, because of his feelings and his fucked up life.

michael finally looked the boy in the eyes and stayed silent.

'I'm jack, and the person that made you do this is a dick.'

》

12k what ?!

yes jack ((thank you anne))

vote / comment thanks for making me smile