Don't You Want Me? ✵ Steve Harrington

Chapter 7

That night, Kim heard a knock on her window and immediately tensed up, wondering if it was the faceless monster Nancy had seen. Realizing a monster probably wouldn't be polite enough to knock, she opened her blinds. Kim narrowed her eyes when she saw that it was Steve.

"You're at the wrong house, dumb ass," she said as he climbed into her room like he had done when they were in middle school.

"What do you mean?" he asked, totally clueless as always.

She rolled her eyes. "Nancy's house is on the other side of town."

"Why do you think I'd want to talk to Nancy?" he asked her. He took a seat on her bed, part of his old comfort around her returning.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe because she's your girlfriend," she scoffed, refusing to sit down next to Steve.

He sighed, hating how hostile she could be when she didn't like someone. He didn't like being on the receiving end of her rage. "I-I just came here to talk to you, Kimmy."

The stupid nick name made her heart race. "What do you want to talk to me about?"

"I hate fighting with you," Steve said, looking into her brown, angry eyes. "I miss you, Kim."

She laughed and ran a hand through her hair. "That's funny, because if I remember correctly, you were the one who stopped being friends with me."

"I'm sorry, okay?" he said, frustrated that she didn't immediately agree like every other girl would have. "Can you just stop hating me?"

The sadness in his voice made her soften a bit. "I've never hated you, Steve. I was pissed at you, for sure. But I don't think I could ever hate you."

He studied her, trying to find the lie in the face he had once known so well. "So we can be normal again, you know, for Nance," he added the last part as a bit of an afterthought.

She seemed to consider his offer for a minute, but she had already made up her mind. "Fine. But it's not all going to be peachy right away. You really hurt me, Steve. You were my best friend and you just ditched me out of the blue without any explanation."

He bit his lip nervously, hating that he had made her feel like shit just so he could look popular in front of people like Tommy and Carol. "I'm really sorry, Kimmy. I just-" he tried to come up with something to justify it, but he couldn't think of anything good enough. "I'm really sorry."

"Okay, don't go all soft on me now, Harrington," Kim joked, finally sitting down next to him and nudging him with her shoulder.

He smiled, seeing a glimpse of the first girl he had ever had a crush on. "Wouldn't dream of it, Henderson." There was a pause while both of them tried to figure out the right thing to say. "How are you and Dustin doing?"

"Do you mean in general or with them finding Will's body?" she asked. Never able to sit still, Kim got up again, cross to the window Steve had entered through and making herself comfortable in the window seat. She pulled a pack of cigs and a lighter out from behind one of the blue pillows, lighting up. After taking a drag and blowing it out the open window, she held it out to Steve as an after thought. He took the extended cigarette like an olive branch, sitting down next to her. 

"Whichever one you want to talk about," Steve said, his voice kinder than she had heard it in over a year.

"Dustin doesn't think he's really dead," Kim said, not wanting to lie to Steve. "It must be really hard for him. I can't imagine having to process all of that. W-We were there, you know? When they pulled Will's body out of the water, we were there. The boys — Dustin, Lucas, Mike — they saw the whole thing. I shouldn't have let them see that."

"What?" Steve's features scrunched confusion as he took a drag. "What were you guys doing at the quarry?"

Kim let out a sad little laugh, taking the cigarette back from him. "Looking for Will. While we were out looking we saw all the ambulances and police cars just zoom right past us. Like an idiot I let us follow them."

"You shouldn't have had to see that either, Kim," Steve said, desperately wanting to reach out and wrap his arms around her. When she looked at him with a confused expression he elaborated. "Yeah, the kids shouldn't have had to see them pull Will out of the water, but neither should you."

She let out a small huff, nodding. "Yeah, guess you're right." She let another ring of smoke float out the window before handing the cig back to the Harrington boy. 

"H-How are you doing with the whole Barb thing?" he asked hesitantly. "Any news from the cops?"

"No," Kim sighed, still feeling guilty about that whole situation as well. "They think she ran away after the party at your place, but I think something seriously wrong happened. I'm just waiting for them to find her the same way they found Will," Kim said, again not lying but not telling him exactly what she felt.

"I feel terrible that she went missing after my party," he said. "It was so stupid. I can't believe that's what I was so concerned with after the Byers boy had just gone missing."

"Yeah, well, but I shouldn't have left her," Kim muttered. "I went to the bathroom for, like, a minute and she was gone."

"Kimmy," he said. With his cigarette free hand, he took her hand in his, making both of their hearts beat faster. "You can't blame yourself for that. There's no way you could have known."

She looked up from their intertwined hands and into his eyes. "You should take some of your own advice, Harrington," she said, trying to force a smile.

He smiled back, squeezing her much smaller hand.

"I'll stop blaming myself when they find her and she's safe," Kim said, thinking of how she had planned to go find the faceless monster with Nancy and Jonathan after Will's funeral. She reached for the cigarette again, Steve quickly handing it over, sure not to get any ash on the cushions of the window seat. 

He let go of her hand, wondering if she could hear how fast his heart was pounding. "I should go. If you need anything, whether it's about the funeral tomorrow or breaking into a gas station for some smokes, just call me."

Cigarette between her lips, she grinned at the memory of a few summers ago when they had been closest. "Thanks, Harrington." They both smirked at each other before Steve expertly climbed back out of her window.

She sat there, finishing her smoke. That stupid, stupid boy, Kim thought to herself. He was too charming and charismatic for his own good. Every time she thought she never wanted to see his ridiculous face again, there he was, showing up in her window to make sure she was okay. Even when she threw hostile attitude at him, he didn't seem deterred. Nancy, she reminded herself, pressing her forehead against the cool glass. He was Nancy's.