The art of love (Oikawa x suicidal reader)

Chapter 5

'What the hell am I doing here?' I think to myself as I stand nervously outside the school gates. I look at my phone for the fifth time.

8:53 pm, Saturday

With each second that passes by, I get more and more anxious. What if I got the time or place wrong? What if it was all a prank and he wasn't coming?

I start taking deep breaths, and try to distract myself with the surroundings. It's a pretty normal autumn evening, the sky is cloudy with spots of blue sky peeking through. There is a slight breeze which carries red leaves through the air. The sun is pretty close to setting already.

I chew anxiously on the sleeve of my oversized sweater. I made sure to wear one that covers my deep scarlet cuts, which haven't healed yet. They look like they could start bleeding again at any moment.

I wonder if Oikawa really had seen the blood on my school shirt that day...

Just then, I feel a shadow lean over me, and there, as if he'd been summoned by my thoughts, was Oikawa. I gasp suddenly at the sight of him.

"Jeez, shittykawa, can you approach me without giving me a heart attack for once?"

He simply laughs it off.

"We giving each other nicknames already? Things are going quicker than I expected!"

I turn away from him at this, flustered. Something about his presence doesn't seem real.

I'm here. Alone. With Oikawa.

He was wearing a brown jacket over a grey hoodie and jeans. It felt strange seeing him in casual clothes, but even I had to admit he does look good...

I realise that I'm staring I look away suddenly.
"So, uh, where exactly are we going?" I ask, trying to break the awkward tension.

"That's a surprise! Although, we may be gone for a few hours, I hope your parents wont mind."

I hadn't told dad that i was going out. It's not like he even cares that i exist anymore.

"Yeah, they'll be fine." I lie.

"In that case," Oikawa announced loudly. "Let the quest begin!"

I roll my eyes at him.
"Don't call it a quest, that's cringe as fuck."

Oikawas just rubs off my comment with a childish smile, like he doesnt care what anyone thinks of him, and begins to walk off down the road.

I quickly catch up to his side and walk next to him, looking down at my feet as I do so.

What do I say? What do I do? Why am I here, with freaking Oikawa of all people?!

"By the way, did you bring your camera?" Oikawa asks, breaking the silence.

"Oh, yeah, course I did." I grab by bag from my shoulders and pull out my camera. It's the most expensive thing I own.

"Oh wow, that's like a proper camera, with a strap and everything." He looks at it amazed, and I cant help but giggle at how easily pleased he is, surprising even myself.

I haven't laughed in so long, I'd forgotten how it felt.

"It was a gift from my Mom." I say, putting the camera back into my bag and pulling my rucksack onto my back.

"Your Mom sounds cool!" He says happily, but my smile shrinks slightly.

"Yeah... she was." I try to think of something else to say, but I cant, and we're left in yet another awkward silence. Oikawa turns to look at me with a guilty expression.

"Hey, I'm sorry. I really am."

"Dont worry about it. Your right, she really was great." I smile softly at him, and our eyes meet for the second time.

That face, the one I've memorized every inch of, the one I've drawn so many times. But he isnt a drawing. He's real.

The real Oikawa is here with me.

We make small talk about school as we walk, and eventually we make it out of town and up a grassy hill. We had only been walking for about ten minutes Tues when we reached a small forest of trees at the top of the hill.

Oikawa stops and turns to face me.
"We're here." He gives me that mischievous grin he always makes.

I look around me at the surrounding trees, slightly confused. There was just... trees.

"No, not over there silly." Oikawa says as he grabs my shoulder with one hand, and points up into the treetops with the other.
"Up there."

I follow his finger until my eyes lay upon what looks to be a treehouse. It looks worn but still good quality, with a small balcony and a ladder leading up to it.

"Come on then!" Oikawa says, rushing towards the tree trunk where the ladder is nailed into. He rushed over to it excitedly, like a little kid. Part of me wanted to start acting childish with him, and eventually I gave in and ran up behind him.

I follow him up the ladder, almost falling at one point (luckily he doesnt see that) and when I get to the top he pulls me to the balcony with his hand.

"This is so nice." I say, as I step inside and look around the interior. Its kitted out with blankets and bean bags, and there are fairy lights strung all around the room. The walls are covered with what looks to be drawings made by a kid.

I take out my camera and take a photo of the small place. It's really the definition of cosy. Oikawa looks over at me, with a proud expression on his face.

"Did you build this?" I continue looking around as he begins to explain.

"Me and Iwaizumi did when we were kids, although he doesn't come here anymore. It's sorta my private space where I come when I want to be apart from the world. I've never shown it to anyone before."

When he says this, I look over to see he is blushing. I've never seen him like this, at school hes always so cool and popular.

I feel special, like I'm seeing a part of him that no one else knows about.

"Oh, it's time! Come with me." He says, and takes me by the wrist. It hurts because hes grabbed me where there are cuts, but I try my hardest not to let the pain show.

He brings me back out to the balcony, and I freeze as I look out onto the view.

It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

From up atop the hill, we overlook our hometown below, which glows golden in the sunset. The entire sky is streaked with soft orange and pink. It's the kind of view you only see in photographs.

That reminds me to take out my camera, and take a photo of the incredible view. I already know this one would go in the book.

We end up standing there, for what seems like forever, until the sun hides away, leaving only the dark sky.

I suddenly yawn, not realising how late it's got, but I dont want to go home. Not ever.

"Hey, Y/N" The sound of his voice is much quieter, I had been so captivated my the sunset that I had almost forgotten he was there.
"There's one more thing I want to show you."

We go back inside and he sits me on a pile of blankets, before crouching down at the corner of the room.

Just then, the fairy lights blink awake, and begin dancing across the ceiling and walls of the treehouse.

It feels like I'm floating through the stars.

Instinctively, I pull the camera to my eye and capture this magical moment.

Oikawa comes over to me, and to my complete surprise, sits down next to me and puts his arm around me. It's unexpectedly comforting, and I sink into his shoulder. His scent is warm like summer and slightly sweet.

We sit together, and the rest of the world simply fades away. Right then, it's just me, him and the stars. I want it to stay like this forvever.

And in that moment, I felt something which I hadn't felt in a long time.

I felt, very much, alive.