[ Lost Love ]

~1~

"Thor!"

He was too late.
He knew she couldn't catch herself.
He had failed her.

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Thor woke up in a cold sweat. Every day he would wake up without her by his side. It was too lonely and he couldn't take it. The first thing he would always do when he woke up, was write a note to her, and stick it on the wall. That way she would see it when she came back from the hospital.

If she would come back...

He hated that he had such intrusive thoughts. She would survive, she was too stubborn to die.

Right?

With a sigh he got out of bed, opening a new pack of blue sticky notes. Her favourite colour. Today he wrote down a quote from one of her favourite movies.

May the force be with you.

He put it next to her bedside table. If someone would come in, they might think he went mad. But this was one of the few things that kept him sane.

6 months and 15 days without her. It pained him to think about it all. She was in a coma, only kept alive with all the machines. Every day when he visited her, he would recognize her less and less.

She had gotten skinnier, paler. Lost all muscles she had. She seemed so small in that bed. He had cried so much there, holding her cold hand against his cheek, his back to the door so no one could see.

Thor hadn't gone on missions since the accident. He couldn't bring himself to protect his teammates anymore, not since he failed to protect the most important one.

Everyone was dealing with it in their own way. Thor, however, definitely was the most affected. Fury would sometimes visit Carol as well, as they were long time friends, bringing flowers, or even comfort food for Thor.

The two of them weren't really close, but they were both close to Carol, and she often invited them to parties and such, causing them to bond more.

Carol really was a social butterfly, and everyone in the complex loved her. She had gotten so many card and letters from employees. Thor wouldn't be surprised if she knew every single person by name.

Thor went through the rest of his morning routine; shower, brushing his teeth, getting dressed, breakfast consisting out of two slices of toast and a cup of coffee.

Immediately when he was done, he locked the door to their room and left to the medical wing. It was one of those mornings where he would miss her more than usual.

He missed everything about her. Her smile, her laugh, the frustrated sounds she would make when he pinned her down the sparring mats, the touch of her lips, her comforting hugs...

He greeted the night nurse, who was finishing up her shift, before entering her room. Nothing changed, nothing ever changed. And it filled him with a feeling of loneliness he had never felt before. Not even when he had lost his brother the first time.

He sat down in his chair. The chair always stood in the exact same spot, no one dared to move it. It was almost as if it was bolted into the floor. It stood close to the bed where Carol was laying.

He looked at her, and the event started flashing before his eyes again.

Carol fell off the edge off the building. He couldn't break free from the Kree's grip in time to go after her. The Kree had managed to suppress her powers earlier, and she couldn't fly. She would fall to her death.

Time seemed to slow down as he head-butted the Kree before kneeing him in the stomach. Leaving him on the ground as Thor ran towards the edge, ready to jump off.

But he was too late...

Carol's body had already hit the pavement. In that moment Thor was convinced she had died already, but he jumped off anyway, dashing towards her and landing next to her. Her blonde hair moved a little due to the impact of him landing.

He carefully grabbed her wrist, feverishly searching for a pulse. He found a very faint one, almost non-existent. But she was alive. Later he would find out that it was the Kree blood in her veins that had saved her life.

Thor contacted the compound immediately, and within half an hour Carol was brought into surgery.

Thor buried his face in his hands. He felt like giving up. No one knew when she would wake up, if she would wake up. And the only thought that kept him sane was the fact that she wasn't dead.

The Kree had been taken into custody, though, Thor had never faced him again. Knowing the Kree Empire had technology strong enough to suppress the powers of and infinity stone that were flowing through her body, it scared him.

He has loathed the Kree all his life, but he couldn't even begin to understand the hatred Carol must feel for them.

She was very vocal about her hatred for the Kree, but she rarely told anyone about what happened to her. Thor, however, knew what happened.

One evening when they were sitting on the living room couch together, and everyone had gone off to home or to bed, so it was just the two of them there. They had been watching a movie Carol had recommended, but Thor only had eyes on her. They hadn't been dating back then, but Thor just knew the two of them would be husband and wife one day.

She had been complaining about how inaccurate the movie was, or something, he hadn't been paying attention. Nevertheless, the two started talking, and the later it got, the more personal the stories they told became.

Eventually Carol told him that she had been kidnapped by the Kree after getting her powers on accident. Thor had patiently listened to her story, and he had felt awful afterwards, the he wanted to fly up into space and go on a murder rampage kind of awful.

He could barely believe that the strong and beautiful woman sitting in front of him had gone through something like that. She had noticed his change of mood and hugged him, continuously assuring him that it all was okay, and that she was fine.

Thor refused to leave her alone that night, and took her to his bedroom. They had cuddled and fallen asleep together.

In the middle of the night, however, Carol had woken up in distress. He had woken up from the noise and held her close. He didn't let go until her ragged breathing had calmed and her body relaxed. She had demanded that he would come and spar with her, and he couldn't say no to her.

All of that seemed so long ago now, but it wasn't that long ago for either of them. Just a few years, and that's nothing in the life of a Kree or Asgardian.

He hadn't particularly been paying attention to his current surrounding, but a near deafening sound made his mind return to reality. What was happening?

He looked at Carol, who clawed desperately at the tube in her mouth that kept hee breathing, but she was slowly turning purple and seemed to not be able to breathe.

Bruce had told Thor over and over again what he should do in case she ever woke up, but right now his mind was completely blank with shock. He knew he should be doing something, but he couldn't find the right thing to do. So, he stood up and tried to grab her arms.

Instead of succeeding in calming her down, she stared at him with bug, fearful eyes. And she still couldn't breathe. Eventually medics rushed in and escorted thor out of the room, so they could help her.

From that moment Thor realized something was horribly wrong, as he had never seen his wife look at him which such terror in her eyes.