1| Today Tonight Tomorrow

11| Lorn

11

lorn

lost, ruined, or undone.

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Dancing With Your Ghost by Sasha Sloan

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A lot has passed over the two months of me only lazing around my own hospital bed in the house. Luca called me the other day to let me know that he and Bree were way done with midterms, Heaven is still the two-faced girl that she is, and Brayden... Well, is still with his French girlfriend, always caught making-out in almost every hallway, empty classrooms, football field, canteen... In short, as Luca would say, "Almost everywhere he goes."

"... What should I say?"

I heaved a sigh as I threw my phone on the bed as I stood against the wall, staring out the window. It was almost midnight and I was home alone. To be honest, it was too good to be true. Uncle or anybody in the house always made sure that I am never alone.

One year. 365 days and probably lesser than that if God wants it to be. Then, here I am doing nothing as time is not getting longer.

"What in the world am I doing?" I muttered to myself as I am trying to think of what better to do than just sitting idly, waiting for death to get me.

I took the pillow lying beside me peacefully, put it on my face and screamed my frustrations out on it.

How must a girl act if she knows she is dying before she could even say that she has a life?

"Probably--" I started.

I was about close to getting an answer on my head when out of a sudden I hear a tap on my window...

And another...

Then, another...

As my anxiety reaches to the critical level, I jumped and I screamed running out of my room. The scaredy-cat side of me taking over. I did not mind that I was practically just wearing a hoodie on with no bottoms underneath, the fact that some ghost might be on the other side of my room's window must be taken seriously.

"Oh God! What was that? Should I call the cops? Should I get a frying pan just in case?"

I ran as much as my feet can take me until I hit someone, knocking both of us down to the ground.

"What the hell?!" Brayden exclaimed as I realized that I might've spilled his orange juice to the ground and on his sweater.

Way to go, Irene! Way to go! You just made a fool out of yourself once more.

Wait.

I thought no one was supposed to be here today but me.

"What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be out like the others?" I asked.

He did not answer.

He continued to slowly took the broken shards of glass on the ground with his bare hands as he muttered curses continuously, not forgetting to point out how miserable his life around me.

I stayed quiet as I looked at him with my ego kind of bruised. Is this really how he feels around me?

With all the courage I have left in me from all the embarrassment I feel that moment, I turned my back on him and decided to go back to my room, until I heard him hissed in pain.

"Shit!"

Of course, he hurt himself. Who cleans that mess with no gloves on? That's common sense.

Without trying to make any conversation, I quickly grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the kitchen. I hurriedly took the first aid kit and stared at his bleeding finger, trying to remember what I learned from my being a student volunteer back two years ago.

I was surprised once again when he pushed me out of the way and went towards the sink.

"You're suppose to soak it on water first." He said as he let the water run on his hurt finger.

"What?"

"I do not understand why you are trying to care now."

I was silent. I could hear the whispers trying to get the best of me once again.

"Told you he would never forget about what you did."

"It's all your fault."

"You rejected him."

"You should've just left like I did. Why did you stay?"

"He could've never left if you said something different."

"You should've never run away."

"You rejected him..."

"Why do you keep showing up in my life when I am doing all the best I can to stay away from you?"

"You rejected him..."

"You rejected him..."

"You rejected him..."

"YOU REJECTED HIM!"

I could feel my heart racing. It was getting hard to breathe.

"It's all my fault." I whispered.

"Is it because I—"

"I'm going back to my room. If you need anything, just knock on my door." I interrupted as I immediately left.

***

I spent the rest of the night swallowed by my bed, crying and acting like some crazy maniac, even my 3AM Sad Songs playlist isn't helping my case. Who would've thought I was back over this?

"He hates the hell out of me. Why am I still surprised?" I muttered to myself as I took a tissue and blow my nose on it.

As I continued to wallow in self-deprecation and regrets, the smoke alarm suddenly turns on.

What in the world is going on?

I was about to stand up and go out of my room to check, when out of a sudden, I feel someone hitting me on the back as I black out to be swallowed by the darkness of my slumber.

Last thing I could remember was the screams of Brayden calling out my name.

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Serenity_hearts

A/N: Really sorry for not updating. I was too caught up with online classes and modules. I hope you understand and I am really really sorry for the inconvenience.