Keira's Life

Keira: Chapter 18

Manic Episode;

I picked up my things as Ricardo came back into the room and he looked at me, I screwed him and he frowned.

'What's happened?'

'Like you don't know! You PROMISED you would come with me on friday!' He looked at me weirdly as if he didn't know.

'You're gonna go to Bianca's stupid party, what happened to 'I don't know her' you liar!' I said and walked out of his bedroom, he followed me downstairs and stood infront of the front door.

'You're blowing this way out of proportion I only said I would go because she won't stop bothering me! She's dick hungry!'

'She can have yours! It ain't nothing much anyway!' His face dropped and he looked at me.

'Now you and I both know that's a lie. You know I would drop my plans for you, of course I'm gonna come and I told you, you can stay the night!'

'You said you didn't know her and I was blowing this way out of proportion, I trusted you!' He rolled his eyes and I opened the front door. I started walking down the road and I got the bus home, I unlocked the front door and the house was silent. I went into the front room and my auntie was sitting on the sofa with a letter in her hand. I put my bag down and sat on the other sofa, her eyes were glued to the letter and she turned her attention to me. The look in her eyes were just filled with pure envy.

'Is this some sick twisted joke?' She asked and I blinked hard. She threw the letter at me and it landed in my lap, I looked at it for a moment and then read it myself. It was from Trevor, I wrote back to him when he first wrote telling him to leave me alone.

'HE LOVES YOU? MY HUSBAND LOVES YOU? A LITTLE GIRL? WHAT YOU CAN YOU OFFER HIM KEIRA?!' I could feel sick rising in my throat and my eyes scanned through the letter, words stuck out to me. Love, missing you, I want to be with you. I wiped a tear from my eye and threw the letter onto the floor.

'You planned this didn't you?!' She said and I looked at her in disbelief.

'I planned for him to do this to me?! He's ruined me!'

'You're pathetic Keira, you're making everyone feel sorry for you when you knew what was going on all along, attention seeking, the drugs, the crying, everything.'

'You think I'd ask for a life like this?' I said standing up and she shook her head at me.

'I'm sick! EVERYONE in my school knows what's happened to me and they look at me like I'm a freak, I'm constantly on edge because of YOUR husband. He fucking tortured me and you're blaming me?! WHO WOULD ASK FOR THAT?' I said and she looked at me, I picked up my things and went up to my room, locking the door I threw my things onto the floor and slid down the door. I needed to relieve my stress on something. Something caught my eye. The scars on my wrists, they were becoming more faint but they were still slightly visible. It made me relive how I felt when I cut myself. It was a way to escape from the stress and problems I had just for a moment of peace, anything for me to stop thinking about Trevor. I looked at my scars and swallowed hard.

I stood up and sat infront of my dressing table, I stared in the mirror looking at my reflection. Everything I saw didn't satisfy me, how could Ricardo be happy with me? I looked at the bottle of pills sat right next to my hand, I poured four out onto the table and looked at them. If I took one too many it could easily end my life; I wouldn't have to suffer any longer with lack of sleep, my auntie hating me for something that was out of my control and my greiving. I tied my hair up and took off my school uniform, I went to shower and wrapped my towel around myself. I put my underwear on and I ran the comb through my wet hair as I looked at my reflection and I could see the cuts on my arms in the corner of my eye. I dried my hair and put my nightdress on.