Chapter 9

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I wake to see Helena's concerned face hovering above me.

Groggily, I ask her what on Earth is the matter and she replies that she has been trying to wake me for some time. Looking towards the windows, the drapes have been pulled back and the morning sun is well established in the sky. It's well past dawn. Sitting up, I rub the sleep from my eyes and assure her I'm alright, that I probably took a drop too many of Morgan's sleeping draught before I went to bed.

"You still have the nightmares? But Rion is..." she starts, not sure where she is going with the line of conversation.

"Dead? Yes, he is but I had another nightmare the night after his execution. I don't know why, but the draught is allowing me some peace at night."

That was a lie; I haven't stopped taking the medicine to find out if I would still have nightmares. I was afraid that my residual feelings of anger and unease would not let me sleep, so I have continued to take it. I also like how it sends me to sleep in the most delightfully deep sleep and how serene I am the following morning.

Helena still looks concerned but withdraws, "If it makes you feel better and allows you sleep, Your Grace. Please do be careful, I have heard stories of others who take a few drops too much and never awaken."

I am touched by her worry for me, and I know that the draught can be dangerous if not used correctly (as Morgan warned before), "I will, Helena. Now, I should probably get out of bed as the morning is clearly wearing on."

The morning involves a meeting of the knights and wider castle staff to iron out the final plans for the upcoming tournament. The schedule of events, who we were expecting, who might turn up unannounced, the set up of living arrangements, food, winner's prizes... It just goes on and on. I'm glad that Arthur has taken the lead on the planning of this event! The initiation of the fledgeling knights-to-be was scheduled ahead of the event itself, so that those who succeeded may take part in the event if they wished.

On a similar theme, a feast was also due to take place the day after tomorrow as a farewell to my Father, who would be returning to Cameliard that following morning. My heart sinks a little; knowing he has been here with me while I transitioned from Cameliard to Camelot, Princess to Queen, and from girl to woman has been of great comfort and a source of courage. Always there for advice and encouragement in the last couple of weeks when I needed his counsel and his company. And dearest Enid, who has enjoyed the change of scenery and with whom I have spent many a day arm-in-arm with, giggling together on our garden walks. I am dreaded their leaving. I had tried not to dwell on this inevitable event so that I could make the most of every moment with them, which I feel I have. But now there are only a few days until they leave, I feel sad and anxious. I already feel a little more alone.

After the meeting, I accompany Arthur to his Solarium where we plan to make the final detailed arrangements to Cameliard's leaving feast. On our way, Arthur asks how my impromptu training session went with Mordred. He seemed to be more amused than rattled that I had been swinging a sword at one of his prospective knights.

"It was such fun, I've never had the opportunity to really train like that before. Although, I think Mordred was holding back."

Arthur laughs, "Can you blame the poor boy, love? Being coerced into training with his Queen, after all. Though, if it helps, they hold back with me a little too... I know they feel they must, because of who we are, but it is frustrating. They don't seem to realise we won't simply shatter like glass if they hit too hard, but if I were in their shoes I suppose I would understand their caution."

"I suppose. It was a good test of skill and I enjoyed it."

"I am glad you are, maybe when I have a free afternoon we can have at it."

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