IN THE MATTER OF MONTHS

11. Just a little bit of your heart

"I know I am not your only, but at least I am one"

"Nong, are you alright? you have been very distracted today, we are on the beach, you love beach shooting. Going on and on about how you love the natural lighting, how great the hosts look because of the lighting" Luke asked the beautiful Cinematographer, He had been acting a little strange from the moment he walked out of his room, the usual excitement he projects during the shooting was missing today and Luke was curious because nothing distracted Tine from work, he had always been a very professional and focussed man. But today seemed to be an exception.

"Damien made a joke about how you look depressed, uh-Ross-depressed today"

"ugh, can he stop with the Friends references?"

"The man is obsessed with the show, it's in his blood now"

Tine rolled his eyes and focussed on setting the camera right.

"The director gave us an early lunch break, you can set it up after lunch"

He dragged a reluctant Tine to one of the beach shacks,

"What's bothering you Teepakorn? You know you can always talk to me, right?" Luke asked softly, trying to figure out why his friend was having a hard time.

Tine stared at him for a moment, contemplating whether telling him would be a good idea, he had never really talked about his and sarawat's relationship with anyone, Fong had been there from the start and Type had found out on his own when he one day found Tine crying on his bed. He decided against it, smiling a bit.

"I am stressed about the shoot"

Luke looked pointedly at him, waving the waiter off who brought their food to the table.

"Why won't you tell me?" Luke asked softly, he looked hurt. Tine stiffened. Not knowing how to handle the situation, he wanted to open up to Luke about it, but Sarawat had always been such an intimate part of him that talking about him was like a taboo. He had always bottled his feelings regarding Sarawat to himself only spilling occasionally when things got too hard, too overwhelming. And that too strictly in front of Fong, but from the last two years he had rarely talked about Sarawat to anyone so this was very hard.

"Is this about the man you have been in love with?"

Tine was shocked, he stared at Luke.

"Don't look so shocked, I am good at reading people, and I have been with you for two years"

"P'Luke.."

"You don't need to worry nong, I am okay, I have known for a long time now"

"How?"

"Um, when you stared at a particular dish of food so longingly even when it was right in front of you, or some of the songs which distracted you so much that you wouldn't even listen to people calling you out, or maybe when you stared at the horizon like you were reminiscing valuable times, or maybe from the fact that none of your dates ever reached to second meetings" "there were plenty N'Tine, you weren't trying to keep it a secret"

"Uh, it happened in college"

"You tell me, when you feel like telling me. I don't want to pressurise you into a confession, i am just letting you know that you have me, i am there for you, as a friend"

"I know P'Luke, trust me, I know.. It is just so hard" Tine's voice trembled, heart soaring because of such wonderful people he filled his life with, he felt so grateful for Luke to say that. Even when the man had some feelings for him that could never be returned he was still willing to be there for him. Tine had run away. the first chance he got, Sarawat had pointed out the same last night.