Catfish and the Bottlemen Imagines

First Time (Van McCann)

Warnings: Some smut but not too explicit...

Even though you're expecting it, the shrill sound of the doorbell chiming makes you practically jump out of your skin. You take a deep breath, willing your racing heart to slow, then you walk slowly to the door. You can see your boyfriend's silhouette through the frosted glass.

"Hey Y/N!" Van greets you in his usual cheerful manner, pulling you into a warm embrace as soon as you open the door.

"Hi Van," you reply quietly, burying your face in his chest, wrapping your arms around his waist.

"Are you okay?" He asks when after a moment he goes to pull away and you're still clinging to him. You feel him plant a kiss in your hair.

"Mmm... yeah I'm good," you say, finally stepping back, wondering how you're going to approach the subject of what's on your mind.

Van cocks his head to the side, scrunching up his face a little. "You sure? You look a bit..."

"A bit what?"

"Errr... I dunno. Like nervous or something?" His voice raises at the end of his sentence, questioningly.

You feel your cheeks warm a little. You've only been with Van for a few months but he seems to be able to work you out.

"Why would I be nervous about seeing you?" You laugh, trying to hide the fact that you are, in actual fact, so nervous your heart's thudding in your chest and your legs feel like jelly. Van's not laughing along with you though. In fact he looks serious, his face etched with concern, his eyes scanning your face. You look down.

"C'mon Y/N, you know you can't hide anything from me," Van says, reaching forward to place two fingers under your chin, gently tipping your face upwards so you can't hide from him.

You realise you're chewing your bottom lip, a habit of yours when you're anxious. He actually looks quite concerned now, so you decide you'll have to take the plunge to assuage his worries.

"I've just been thinking... about you and me..." you start, trailing off when Van's brow furrows, making you realise that he's probably thinking something's seriously wrong now.

"Oh, don't worry it's nothing bad," you hurriedly say. "It's actually... errr... something good."

He exhales loudly, relieved. "Phew! Thought you were gonna break up with me or something!"

"God no!" You blurt out, shocked he would think such a thing. Then you take his hand, urging him to follow you to the bottom of your stairs, and when you place your foot on the first step you turn to face him.

"I think it's time we... you know..."

Van's eyes go wide, his mouth falling slightly agape. "You mean...?"

Neither of you have actually said the words but you don't need to. The tension has been building between you both for weeks. Kisses have gotten deeper, hands have wandered further, heartbeats have pounded quicker.

At first you'd felt awkward when Van's hands had gone to the fastening on your jeans when you'd been kissing and you'd stopped him. The truth was you were still a virgin. Most girls your age had lost their virginity years before, an awkward fumble with a first boyfriend just for the experience or a drunken mistake at a party, but not you. You wanted it to mean something. You wanted it to be special with someone you loved. And you loved Van. You were sure of it.

"I'm ready," you say, pulling him forward and then turning to walk up the stairs whilst he trails after you.

"Wow..." Van breathes as you both walk into your bedroom. You've lit countless candles and they stand on every available surface, giving off a warm, muted glow.