The Protection

Thirty-Seven

My crippled, exhausted mind finally relented moments later, giving way to a haunted, restless sleep. Full of dreams that were dark and awash with terror, full of images I didn't understand.

My father at my fifth birthday party, smiling at me, his gray eyes matching mine, but filled with something my young mind couldn't comprehend. Loss, sacrifice? I wasn't sure. As I blew out my five colorful candles, I watched him out of our small kitchen window. My father joined a man and woman I had never seen before, climbing into the back of a simple black van. My mother smiled at me, unaware, with her back to the window. I tried to tell her what was happening, but she was too busy cutting my pink strawberry cake. The dream flipped, like pictures in a kaleidoscope, to my mother now standing on Cannon Beach in Oregon, separated from me by the large iconic rock. I tried to reach her, but the further I extended my arm the further away she became. The picture flipped again to Kyler. He was standing in a classic black tuxedo, fighting tears as a stunning Alana walked down the aisle dressed in all white.

I rolled frantically side to side before hitting something hard against my back. My eyes snapped open, and I turned to find a large box sitting on my bed, digging directly into my back. I scrambled to flip on my bedside lamp looking at the intricate white and silver wrapping and the large gold bow. Something about the presentation of this box was familiar, but I couldn't place where or how. All I knew is that this present certainly hadn't been in my bed when I fell asleep last night. The thought was overwhelmingly alarming. Something deep inside of me screamed not to touch the box, not to open it, but my own morbid curiosity got the best of me.

I slowly unwrapped the bow, pulling on its edges, still not fully wanting to touch it. I removed the heavy lid slowly, my heart in my throat, and gasped. A dead white rabbit lay inside, its black lifeless eyes staring up at me atop its slit white throat. I tried not to gag as I reached my shaking hand inside of the box to grab a photo that lay beneath the rabbit, shocked to realize it was a picture of me. They all were. At least twenty of them. I pulled out more at a frantic pace. Pictures of me from around campus in various positions, unaware I was being photographed. I pulled out the last of the photos, careful not to touch the rabbit's head. I studied each one individually spreading them around my comforter like a terrifying landscape, trying to understand what any of this meant. After each one was laid out, looking at me, I realized the photos had one common theme: Kyler. Kyler with me in the stacks of the library. Kyler and me in the courtyard. Kyler with me by the river after my run. There was even a picture of us sitting on his couch, through the window in his house. I gingerly picked up a note that had been hidden under the photos and was positioned beneath where part of the rabbit's leg was missing:

Gentle as a bunny. White as snow. You're beautiful now, but continue on with The Protector and you will be buried below...

My mind reeled. Someone had been following me. Someone other than Kyler. The dread I had felt in the pit of my stomach had been real. The person had snuck into my room while I was asleep and planted this box in my bed. I just laid here sleeping with my nightmares as the intruder stared at me. I felt so violated. I flipped the card over, my hands now shaking so hard I could barely make out the perfect cursive handwriting. Scrawled on the back right corner was something else. I used my free hand to steady the other so I could read it:

All the best to your father.

The words taunted me in the same way as the awful man in the alley had as he held the knife to my neck. Tell Daddy I said hello. I never mentioned what happened to Kyler, thinking that comment was something so small in the grand scheme of things. What could my deadbeat dad have to do with anything? I had a feeling I had made a grave mistake. I pulled on an old pair of gray shorts and my black volleyball sweatshirt and hugged myself tightly. I had to get out of here. I shoved the photos back into the box and walked into the living room. I reached for Beth's keys on the entry table, but they were gone. I panicked briefly thinking the intruder had taken them until I spotted her Mercedes still in the driveway. That was strange. I must have put the keys elsewhere.

I shook my head and shoved open my front door. I knew it wasn't the smartest idea to wander around by myself while the stalker who visited me in the night roamed free, but I was without a car and I had to talk to Kyler. I had to know why my absentee father was now the topic of very violent conversation. I breathed in the early morning air, trying to calm my emotions, as I followed Kyler's tremendous pull. He was close. I walked around the side of the apartment complex and over to the small children's playground. The sun was turning the sky shades of red and pink as it rose. Kyler sat humorously large on one of the swings, texting on a cell phone. He looked more like a delinquent teen than a massive, unforgiving Protector.

"I didn't know you had a cell phone. Is that allowed?" I growled kicking some rocks outside of the swing set pit. He smiled broadly and shoved the phone into his pocket. He was probably texting Alana.

"Of course. I'm a Protector, not an alien," he joked, referencing the first time we spoke in my room. All those months ago - a lifetime ago. I tried to smile, but I couldn't make myself. I was relieved he hadn't seen me earlier tonight, making a fool of myself, confessing my undying love to someone who didn't deserve or even want it from me.

"What's that?" he asked, motioning towards the box I held in my hands. Back to the terrifying task at hand. I walked wordlessly over to the park bench beneath the closest street lamp and tossed the box aside. His entrancing eyes remained glued to mine as he walked over slowly, his golden eyebrow raised, sensing something was amiss. His eyes finally broke away from mine as he lifted the lid of the box and peered inside. I could see the color drain from his face as he looked at each picture, one by one. "Where did you get this?" He whispered.

"It was in my bed when I woke up this morning." I spat. "Someone broke into my apartment overnight and placed this horrible thing next to me. While I slept. Someone else has been watching me this entire time."

"That's impossible. I've been here all night, and no one has come in or out since you got home!" He said, his voice rich with disbelief. Does that mean he saw me come home? Saw the tears that littered my face and the sobs that overtook my chest - all at his expense. I felt my cheeks glow, ashamed now of my public breakdown, regardless of how much my heart still ached as I looked over at his stunning chiseled profile. Stop staring, he is engaged you stupid stupid girl! My mind taunted and I tried my best to put all thoughts of him and last night aside. This box and the immediate threat was what was important.

"What does all this mean?" I asked quietly. The wind picked up and rustled some leaves, causing me to glance over my shoulder. Nothing. My eyes traveled back to Kyler and the way the sunrise made his hair glow impossibly more gold. Angelic. "What, um what does the part of the note about my father mean..." I muttered, crossing one leg behind the other, watching as his handsome face contorted into a series of different masks. "I remembered the guy in the alley mentioned my dad, and now this..." I whispered again, barely over the sound of the wind, but I knew he could hear me. "Why are they talking about him? What does he have to do with me now? I haven't seen him in over fifteen years." Kyler remained silent. A coyote howled in the distance, and I shivered, hugging my sweatshirt tight to my chest.

"I shouldn't be the one to tell you. I can't." He shook his head and wouldn't make eye contact with me.

"What're you talking about?! Kyler, why is this about my father?" I growled, anger rising in my voice. I clenched my teeth. He stood perfectly still, not looking in my direction. Stoic. "Fine," I shrugged, picking up the box. "If you can't be honest with me, that's one thing, but be honest with yourself. I saw you last night with Alana. I know you weren't watching over me. Protecting me. You could've easily missed someone breaking into my apartment, staring at me as I slept, and leaving mutilated animals and stalkerazzi photos of me in my bed." He shifted slightly, a crack in the exterior.

"I'm sorry, I thought you would have stayed at Ben's after the party." He admitted, his eyes looking somber at the thought.

"Save the sad eyes Kyler, I know you're still in love with her. I know that whatever we had between us was all just a lie, that I was a job for you. You are allowed to spend time with your fiancée and be happy. Really. It just makes you more human than I thought, but lying about it makes you just like every other insincere guy I've ever met." His brown eyes were wide, and I swear they looked glassy with fresh tears in the rising sun, but I wouldn't allow myself to believe they were genuine tears. I wasn't sure anything about this man was genuine anymore. "I was getting by okay before you came into my life, and I think I can manage from here on out and protect myself. Thank you for everything, but you can move on now to a new assignment. To someone else's life to destroy." I spun on my heel, not bothering to look back as I walked the path to my apartment. He didn't come after me that night.