Tainted

4

My breath is lodged in my throat as I see the change in his eyes.

From joy, I suppose at finally meeting his mate, to sorrow and finally it rests in disgust at realising my scent isn't pure. I knew this would happen but seeing it play out hurts more than anything I could ever imagine.

I'm finally able to drag my eyes from his and I lower them to my skirt as they all gather into the room making the hospital room feel smaller than it really it.

"Bonnie, it's good to have you back with us" the alpha speaks as his Luna crosses the room to sit beside me on the bench and rests her hand on mine.

"Thank you alpha and thank you for making sure I was rescued" I offer my gratitude to him. I try and ignore the feel of eyes boring into the side of my face. I didn't want to see anymore of what he thinks of me.

"I trust you'll be fit to be integrated back into pack life in no time" he says, his tone light.

"I hope ..." I start to say but I'm interrupted by a deep and very captivating voice that makes my wolf want to just curl.

"I'd like to speak to her alone please" he says leaving the room in silence. I pray against all hope that my alpha declines but I know it's wishful thinking.

"Of course Alpha Hall" my alpha answers even has he looks slightly puzzled at the request. "Get better soon Bonnie" and with that he heads for the door.

The Luna gives my hand a reassuring squeeze even as I look up at her, her eyes filled with understanding and sympathy. And then we were alone.

He's quiet, just looking at me and then something clicks. My alpha said alpha Hall that means he's the son of Nicholas Hall and from the Tikkana pack. I inwardly groan as I connect the dots. Of course I'm just that unlucky.

The Tikkana pack is known for their pureness. They don't accept a tainted mate, ever, no matter what. Rumors have it that they instead pray for a new mate at the first new full moon and that their prayers are always usually answered.

"You've been with another" he says, breaking me from my thoughts. His eyes on my even if I refuse to look at him. I nod, silent as I continue to look down. "Why"? He utters with so much pain lacing his words that I'm forced to look up at him.

His face blank but his set jaw betrays it. He's angry and I can understand that anger. I'd be angry too if I was in his position. Why is he asking I think as I look back down unable to continue staring at what I know I'll never have.

How do I answer that? I didn't have a choice in the matter, Novu didn't care about my future? In the end, I know no answer would sate him. No answer can tamper the unjust he feels has been done to him and his wolf.

It would have been better if we had never met. If he had continued his life but that's selfish. What's left now is to settle for the next best thing. Rejection.

Even as I think it I feel my wolf's pain. I don't know how hard it'll be to actually go through with it. I know it'll be hard and I'll probably loose my wolf but I will survive, for my pup. I'll make sure we pull through together.

"The answer to that question will only cause more pain than you're feeling right now" I reply instead. He's still standing there, looking at me but I can't make myself look up yet. "It would be better if you just reject me. That way you and your wolf won't suffer any longer"

I say, half expecting him to reject me almost immediately but he remains quiet. He moves closer, closer until I could see his shoes in my vision. The air becomes so tense around me as his scents invades me even more, almost choking me.

"Look at me" he commands and months of conditioning under Novu has me snapping up my face to his instantly before I even realize what I'm doing. He stares deep into my eyes, as if boring my soul while I try my best not to be sucked into the memories that hunt me.

"That would be nice for you wouldn't it. For me to reject you, so you could continue with your ways, the rejected already tainted female, free to be with whomever she pleases" his words do the trick as they feel life knives plunging into my heart. He smirks as my eyes fill up with tears in my pain.

In a way, I feel better. He hurts me with words the way I've no doubt hurt him with my being tainted.

"No, no. I don't think I'm gonna reject you yet mate. No not yet. I'm not going to give you that freedom to do whatever it is you think you're going to do" he says as he moves away from me as if thinking to himself.

I fill up with dread as my mind registers what he is saying exactly. Why would he want to prolong this? To make us suffer more? Am I really that unlucky to be mated to a sadistic bastard?

He stops suddenly, half way across the room and looks at me. "You are my mate, whether I want you to be or not". Ouch. "I'm going to talk to your Alpha, let him know that we're mates and when I return to my park tomorrow, you'll be coming with me" he says with an air of finality.

Panic blooms inside of me at his words knowing it would only end up badly for me.

"But you don't want me as your mate, you can't" I grasp at straws moving towards him and falling on the floor, hoping to make him see reason so I could escape the heartache I know this would cause. "Please, just reject me. I'm sorry please" I end up sobbing as I lay at his feet, not beyond begging for a bit of reprieve.

"Know this now mate" he says as he stands tall, not even showing a bit of sympathy. "Your wish is not my command. I don't have any inclination to do what will make life better for you since you didn't have any consideration for me when you soiled yourself". And with that, he strode out. Leaving me a sobbing mess on the floor.

I can't help but think again, who I've offended to be dealt the hand that fate has dealt me with repeatedly. I pick myself from up the floor back to my seat by the window.

Shortly after he leaves, my parents come back into the room, elated. The alpha just spoke to them. I'm the mate of alpha Hall and he isn't rejecting me. My father's face is pulled in a smile so big. His daughter won't be disgraced by the community, she won't be ridiculed or cast out, instead she's to be a Luna.

Alpha Hall returns with the other man I hadn't recognized. He's introduced to my parents as Beta Daniel. I notice he didn't even look in my direction as he tells my parents his plan to leave the next day.

My mother's face fall. She's not too eager to see me go after she's just got me back but agrees nevertheless as she can actually communicate with me this time. My father asks that I leave later on so I could see my brother and best friends and I inwardly cheer him on.

Alpha Hall remains adamant and soon, all the arrangements were made.

When they leave, I'm discharged to go home with my parents, so alpha Hall can pick me up in the morning for the journey. My old room feels foreign but I don't show as my mother fuss over me.

When they all go to bed that night all I could think about was I had escaped or more like being rescued from one person only to be held captive by another and this time, her brother wasn't going to be able to save me. No one was.

The next morning was a blur. I felt overwhelmed with so much emotions as I said good bye to my parents and get on the car and the next thing I know, we were on the road to my mate's pack.

Neither of them spoke to me and in a way, I preferred it. I don't know how my new life would be. If it's anything like my old life then I know I'm doomed but somehow, because it's my mate, whatever he does to me, I know it's going to feel worse.

He's behaving this way now. I can only imagine how he'd react when he finds out that I'm not only tainted or soiled like he called me but I'm also carrying a pup that's not his.

*Thanks for reading 😘
Please vote and comment*