The Class Game

Chapter 12-What Now

He's gone. He is really gone.

I wake up to pure pain on my head like someone has smacked me with a plate. I can barely sit myself up. I touch my head as i sit up onto my elbows. It stings as i barely touch it.

I look around. Im still in my gown. Im still in the same stiff bed. Im wrapped in nothing but chords. Im still in the hospital.

I look over to my left to find my mom staring at me and sniffing. She has a tissue in her hand.

To her right is Tucker. He looks scared and worried. He looks like he is about to explode with tears of the unknown.

"Mom?" i ask confused.

"Oh honey!" she gasps as she jumps up from the chair and wraps her arms around me. She holds on to me and just sobs into my shoulder. Shouldnt i be the one who needs comfort? Instead, i rub my mothers back as if she were my child. She finally leans away and sits back down. She takes a deep breath.

I can feel my eyes almost popping out of my skull. They must be as big as saucers. My whole body shakes. Not because im cold, but because i feel.. dead.

"Mom?" i question again.

My lower lip begins to wobble and quiver. I know what my answer will be. So why should i even ask? I need to make sure this all isnt just my imagination i guess.

She shakes her head slowly in a yes motion. She begins to cry as her face turns blood red. I sit there and begin to breath rapidly like im trapped. There is absolutely no way out of this.

My eyes look over at Tucker. My sweet annoying little brother who at this moment looks like hes crushed. But why?

So many questions run through my mind.

"He was having major problems Samantha. His spinal cord was fractured, he had tissue damage, and he also had a broken collar bone. He had a blood clot in his heart. His body stopped producing platelets so he bled from a wound in his shoulder." she paused. "They said his body was trying to heal so fast that it was becoming worn out. They said there was alot more going on inside of his body that we didnt know about. And lastly, they said he wouldnt have made it anyway."

I cant find words to say.

"Im so sorry. Im sure he was a nice young man. He seemed sweet enough to bring you home from school and take you out." she added to help me smile. It didnt work. Nothing will.

"Can you just leave me alone?" i asked as i stared off at the wall straight ahead.

Tucker and her shuffled out of my hospital room and closed the door.

I let my elbows relax under me, causing me to lay flat on my back and look up at the ceiling.

I drift off to sleep. Which is the only place i can find peace if the nightmares decide not to come along.

I wake to the same beeping sound of the heart monitor. My racing heart has subsided to a slow pulse. Ive seemed to calm down, but i dont know for sure if i have. My brain steams with a billion thoughts that overwhelm me. Why couldnt i have died? Why did he have to? Im the one who deserves to.

The doctor comes in. I havent seen his face. If i have, i mustve not cared to much to remember it.

"How you feeling, Samantha?" he asked with a touch of nervousness in his voice. He looks at me like im a fierce cat who might pounce and claw his eyes out.

I shift on my very uncomfortable bed.

"Fine i guess." i say sternly.

"We did a checkup while you were asleep and it looks like your going to be able to go on home today." he said way to blissfully.

Home? i wonder. Where is home now that Chris is gone?

It is no where.