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'They promised that dreams can come true but forget to mention that nightmares are dreams, too.' - Oscar Wilde

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My eyes are plastered on the ground as I sit opposite my father in Aurélien's office. Richard allowed us to use the office for privacy.

I can feel my anger for Matthias simmering, trying my best not to look at him. I can tell he's uncomfortable with the situation even though he asked for this. He doesn't know how to speak to me, his own daughter because he never watched me grow up. He doesn't know me.

We're strangers.

I only peak up through my eyelashes when Matthias clears his throat, his eyes meeting mine when he comments, "You look just like your mother."

I want to scoff but I hold back, weighing him up through my eyelashes, taking note of how anxious he looks. After twenty years, the first thing he says is that I look like my mother? Is that all he can think to say?

We have five minutes alone and I'm going to use it to get answers. I'm not here for small talk.

"Why?" I ask accusingly, my hands balling the fabric of my dress as I try to keep my features steady, "Why did you give me up?"

Matthias' features are noticeably stiff, uncomfortable with the question. I'm sure being a king, he's never had to justify his decisions before but here he is not a king, he is a father and I am not one of his subjects, I'm a daughter who wants to know why her father abandoned her.

It's a moment before he finally speaks, my eyes locked onto him, "I never wanted to, believe me..." He trails off a moment, finding this difficult but he soon picks back up with, "But it was my choice. Your mother wanted to keep you, to change history but I convinced her that was foolish, that it was too risky for all of us." Matthias pauses, his voice becoming watery when he breathes, "We weren't prepared to make them choices. We never thought you'd be a valerian."

"But yet you were prepared to give me away, to lie to Aldéric and give my place to Adeline." I remark, not buying into his act. "You were selfish." I say it how it is, the one thing he doesn't want to hear.

"And afraid!" Matthias snaps forward, his small outburst taking me off guard as he exhales heavily, "I won't lie and say I didn't have something to gain from sending you away but those weren't the fundamental reasons. We were afraid for you and any retaliation that came with your birth."

My features soften for a moment, just a moment before I'm angry again, demanding, "Didn't you ever think about how your decision would affect me? Did you not once think to check up on me?"

For twenty fucking years I believed my parents were dead. How could he go that long without even making sure I was safe?

"I-I wanted to," He admits softly, his eyes pained with guilt, "There were so many moments where I was tempted to just get on a jet and go visit you, even just to have a look..." He trails off, running his hand over his face before his brown eyes lock onto me once again, "But I couldn't risk anyone connecting me to you. I knew Paul and his brothers would look after you, they've been loyal to me for years and I trusted them with you completely. That was the one thing that gave me comfort for all these years."

I want to believe him, to forgive him even, but I don't think I have the ability to let go of the anger and blame I have towards him.

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