Healing Him || P.JM ✔

Chapter 44

A/N: This chapter take place 5 months, after the last events. I know it's a big jump in time but it is necessary for the story.

Enjoy,vote,comments

Jimin's pov

I sigh frustrated. I was mad i stop the music and glare at my dancer.

"Guys, you need to be fucking focus y'all can't keep messed up!"

I said to them. They avoid eye contact with me, we are all exhausted it's been hours we practice.

"The event is in 2 months we need to practice harder and i can't focus when you all don't take it seriously !"

The event was finally held the organiser found a new place. It's take more time but we finally have the date.

"Let's do it again"

I said and start the music again.

After what feels like an eternity the practice comes to an end.
I sit and leaned my head against the wall, im tired fucking tired. Those past few months have been the most stressful and hard of all my life.

I keep my mind busy as most as possible to not think about her, i didn't even dare to say her name since the last time i saw her. Im not gonna lie i miss her, i miss her voice, her laugh, her touch, her company.

Everything become more complicated than the begining, when i feel  like i have everything in control and i was moving forward then something come and fucked up everything. I heard the alarm of my phone that's my clue, i get up and take my phone it's time to pick Chris at school. Since Natasha become really busy with the event those days i have to pick him at school so i have to finished earlier.

I walk out of the room and go downstairs toward the employees area, i take my bag and change my sweat clothes to new ones. I finish to change when the door open, i turn around and it was Jackson. He stare deeply at me before coming and change as well, i ignore  him like i ignore everyone lately, i just don't feel like it.

I know what he's gonna say and what he have in mind and i personally don't want to hear it. I close my bag and was about to leave.

"You know, you don't need to give me your cold glare and act like an asshole with me or everyone"

He snapped at me. I shook my head not wanting to talk to him, i reach my hand to open the door but he stop me again.

"You really disappoint me Jimin...You disappointed Maze too you know"

He said and i turn around looking at him.

"You know better  to not talk about that Jackson, if you want to keep our friendship"

I said staring at him dead in the eyes. He only shrugged, like what i just said don't matter to him. That's what i hate about Jackson and admire at the same time he don't let people have a way with him and always be honest even if it hurt them.

"You need to make things right... you can again, all is not lost. you can't keep go around and act like nothing happened. For god's sake Jimin you change, you become a good person for you and your son, she makes you become a better person sh-"

"Stop fucking talking about her !"

I yell at him, i have enough of everyone telling me the same bullshit and how should i behave.

Why no one can't think about me and my feelings ?

Why it has to be only about her ?

Did nobody care about me ?

He clench his jaw clearly not happy that i yelled at him, well to bad.

"You think you are in a good position to give advice when you are lying to yourself and more messed up than me"

I said staring at him. He tilt his head in confusion.

"What are you talking about ?"

"I talk about Tracey"

I said and he instantly froze in his place.

"Surprise hun? Did you forget that you hurt her too, you hurt her because you are affraid to be with her and what you feel for her"

I said serious and he look shocked because we never talk about it. He always avoid the topic of her and him since that day.

"You are affraid to fall in love because you don't believe in love. I know you Jackson, all this time you go around slept with women because you can forget about her, and act like you don't care, when i know deep inside you, you care about her"

I chuckle slightly at the end.

"We are both screwd Jackson. So don't talk about me  when you can't fixe your own issue either"

I said. He stay there looking lost, i shook my head and finally leave the studio.

[...]

I pick up Christian and as his new habits he ignoring me. My son change his behavior with me, he don't smile at me or talk to me anymore like he used to. It's like he have something against me but he don't tell me anything even in sundays when we talk he barely say a word to me so we just walk until we comeback home.

It hurt me this sudden distance with him, those past few months.
We reached home he go out of the car and quickly enter the house, i sigh and go out too.

Christian was in his room, i knock and went inside.

"Chris can we talk ?"

I ask him softly, he looked at me.

"Im doing my homework"

He said and i sigh.

"You can do it them later. I want to talk to you...I miss you, you know"

He shrugged and continue his homework while ignoring me. I decide to let him, i don't want to force him so i go downstairs and turn the tv on.

I go through the channels and stop when i see the movie Maze and i were watching the day we have our first kiss. I sigh deeply, i can't stop myself thinking about her, it hurt me.

How can our relationship end up like that ?

Why did she told me that she was pregnant ?

Why did she have to ruin everything ?

I can't get myself go to this again. I'll not support this situation again, my was beating fast, im nervous and scared.

why everything has to go like last time ?