Identifying Sara

Chapter Nine

Hey guys! Thanks for reading ;))) give feedback on what you think? Anyway hope you enjoy the chapter and I don't have much to say so lets just get on with the story :P....

I was finally dragged out of the gymnasium by two random guys dressed in black outfits with fine white letters printed on it, and whose muscles are the size of Jupiter, with my mother following behind of course. Yup, that's right, my mom hired guards of some sort to drag me out of a gym in front of my friends. Friends? Did I seriously just call them my friends? In more accurate words: Rina and people I despise less witnessed the whole thing. And Carson. They all were still as we watched the men approach me, but once I started to struggle in their grip, Carson was the first to snap from his daze and lunge at the men without thinking twice. The rest tried to fight the guards thinking I was in trouble, yelling at them to let go of me, but that only resulted to worse things. I could still see it, so clear that it was like it kept happening over and over again. Like I kept reliving the moment.

Two guards stand beside my mom at the doorway. Kristy is also there, shaking her head in disappointment. They come towards me each grabbing one of my arms. I drop the ball and gasp, fear trickling through my entire body. What was happening? Carson snapped out of a daze that he was in and jumped on one of the guards, wide-eyed. "Let go of her!" He shouted. He tried to punch a guard but the guard beat him to it. The impact sent him to the ground and I was dragged away.

"Do you know how mad I am at you?!" My mother screams as she paces around the small living room. I focus my eyes to what's in front of me; I sit on the couch with my hands folded on my lap keeping the emotion from my face, the last thing I want is for anyone to see how I really feel about the whole situation, it's just easier to keep quiet. Kristy is beside her completely silent, she hasn't said a word at all today. Her eyes are fixed on the carpet, slightly wide, but mostly her expression is so blank that it's hard to read.

"Yeah, I have a vague idea," I reply shrugging my shoulders and keeping in the laughter trying to expose itself.

"This is no time for sarcasm Annalise! You lied to me and we have a big problem now, all of those stupid kids in the gymnasium saw everything Annalise! Do you not understand that, or do I have to sound it out for you like your five? You clearly can't get anything through your head." She pinches the bridge of her nose and closes her eyes sighing. Well that was harsh. I feel my eyes sting and fill with water but I refuse to let the tears fall. The things my mother says to my face only makes me think more about rebelling against her rules.

"You're some parent you know that? Basically telling their child that they're stupid. And just so we're clear, I understand everything perfectly, but I think it's you who needs to get things through your head. I know you think I'm some sort of toy, but no matter how much you think I am, I never will be. And one last thing: I will find my dad weather you like it or not!" I yell. My mother opens her eyes and stares at me in disbelief, anger raging in her eyes. She points to the staircase.

"Room. Now."

I huff and stomp up the stairs, slamming the door so hard, the noise makes the small ache in my head, grow.. But no matter what my mother says, I don't regret anything I said. It's true, I will find my dad no matter what it takes. 

+++

After being in my room for 3 hours doodling a constellation on the back of an old notepad, I decided that being locked up similar to like i've been my whole life wasn't going to fix matters. I needed to get out of here before the air gets too hard to breathe.

I grabbed a maroon colored jacket that I chose because one of the little memories I have of my father, is of him leaving for work in a maroon colored sweater vest. The depressing thing is, his face never made an appearance in any of my memories. I climb out the window, jumping to the ground from the tree sitting outside my window. I ended up walking to a park that was about a five minute walk away.

There was tons of green grass which was covered by a light blanket of snow where dogs ran free, children chased each other through the snow occasionally tossing snowballs at each other, couples walked along the pathway bundled up in their winter gear, and then there was me, pouting and only seeing skies of gray. I sat on a boulder near of what looks like the entrance to a deep, dark, forest. My breathing calmed for the first time in a few hours. It was steady as if the small breeze the trees gave made everything disappear into thin air taking all my worries with it. Well, all until Carson showed up.

"Sara?" I look up and see Carson standing there, now in jeans and a winter coat. His hands in his pockets shifting on one foot to another. He looks cold because of the light pink making an appearance on the tip of his nose and on his cheeks; but as the same time his face looked in pain.

I looked down at my lap feeling embarrassed because of what happened earlier. "Um, hey," I say quietly. He climbs up onto the rock and sits next to me, not too close, but a safe distance. The silence is awkward, making me consider leaving, but only god knows where I would go.

"Hey, I didn't think I'd see you again. Are you alright?" He asks softly. I look at him trying to tell weather he is actually being serious or not.  Should I even trust him? He probably doesn't even care, maybe he is one of those people who does these type things to help their reputation but no matter what it's all fake. "Why do you even care?" I ask putting as much disgust in my voice as I can handle.

"Hey, don't get all defensive, I'm trying to help you. And why am I not aloud to care?" He asks. I watch the moister from his mouth make a tiny cloud in the freezing air that disappears in seconds as he speaks.

"Well, you shouldn't care. I should be the least of your worries," I spit at him, still keeping my voice a little to harsh for my liking, but he seems to completely ignore the tone in my voice.

"Sara, you can believe what you want, but I am telling you now, and I will tell you as many times as it takes you to believe this, but I care," he says in a calm voice. I look at him unsure, and he stares back. How can I believe someone like him? How can he really think I will just easily fall into his trap? Suddenly he takes his hand out of his pocket and places it above mine that is resting on the rock. I move it quickly but he takes my hand in both of his and looks me in the eye. My throat becomes dry making it hard to concentrate. The nerves are already more than I can control and he continues to stare right into my eyes, making me feel extremely exposed.

"Listen, I'm not trying to scare you, but I need you to know that you can't avoid me forever, okay? I am trying so hard to be a friend to you, but. . . but-"

"But what?!"

"But I don't know how," he admits slightly lowering his head as if he is ashamed, I don't see why he has a reason to be ashamed though, if anything I should be the one ashamed. He is doing everything he can to try to be my friend and I'm just pushing him away.  "I don't really know how to act or what to do, I guess you could say i've forgotten, but i'm trying for you, " I feel myself turn pink at his words, but this all seems to good to be true. He almost had me actually believe him, for a split second.

"Yeah, and I'm a unicorn," I roll my eyes and take my hand away from his grip forcefully. I can't believe I almost fell for his trick. I jump off the rock and start heading towards home again. But before I leave I say:

"No one can make me talk to you."

"We'll see," he replies. I turn and raise an eyebrow, but continue walking, this is something I do not want to be apart of, I may be able to trust other people like Rina, but there's something about him that makes me want to jump into his arms asking where he has been all my life, But I don't like that part of me.